By Crescent Light
by Kathrine
Summary: G1, crack. Talking mascots, pretty skirts and sparkles abound: Prowl and the Pretty Sailor-Suited Autobots are here to protect and serve. Earth will never be the same. Just stay right there and we'll show you!
1. Crescent Moon

**Crescent Moon**

_6 of 13 in the ProwlxJazz LJ Community Halloween '09 Challenge_

"This is highly illogical." Prowl was adamant, his doorwings held stiffly behind him as he regarded his fellow officer and now…_partner_. Jazz was looking far too amused about their situation for his own good, fairly dancing on his pedes as he hummed quietly. "Can't you take this seriously for once?"

"Aw, c'mon Prowler," Jazz grinned, elbowing him in the side. Prowl grunted, eyeing him distrustfully. "Ain't that bad. And you gotta admit, this' got some perks to it. Didja see the look on ol' Bucket-head's face?"

"I think the look on Megatron's face will follow me to the Matrix." Prowl replied dryly. "I didn't think he was capable of squeaking like that." Jazz guffawed and Prowl shot him a glare. "But that still doesn't change the fact that we don't have any rational explanation for why we've had these…upgrades, if you could call them that."

"Sure we do!"

"I do not include _that_ as a rational explanation. More like an overenergized-induced hallucination."

"Hey now, I don't think the nice winged lady woulda appreciated you callin' her a hallucination." Jazz said easily. "And I thought she explained pretty nicely. She had pictures an' everything!"

"The mere idea that the light of a natural satellite in a certain phase could even possibly grant a major increase in power via a small jeweled accessory – which also includes certain changes to one's plating to grant the full effect – is ridiculous." Prowl frowned, crossing his arms over his chest. The new additions made this awkward, but Prowl stoically endured it. "Particularly when the self-proclaimed guardian of this ability claims that two members of an alien species are the ones chosen specifically for this power, in order to protect a planet that's not even their own."

"Yeah, but we'd protect Earth anyways."

"That's not the point!"

Jazz put a friendly hand on Prowl's shoulder, and Prowl flinched, his gaze locked on the hand. It sparkled faintly in the moonlight. "Cool it, Prowler. Logical or not, we've been given these upgrades, so let's get out there and do what we do best. Just think of it as a new invention of Wheeljack's!" Jazz paused as Prowl shuddered. "Okay, maybe that's a bad analogy."

"No, I think it's fairly apt." Prowl's tone was acerbic, and Jazz just grinned at him.

"Ya gotta admit, some of it comes in handy though." Jazz' grin turned feral, twirling a stylized wand in his free hand. "Now let's go scare some 'cons."

Prowl sighed, shuttering his optics briefly. "_Scare_ is a good word." He muttered. "All right, let's get this over with." With that, he straightened, shoulders back and chestplate out, garishly bright bow shining a brilliant red in the moonlight. Jazz' equally brilliant blue miniskirt flared as he twirled to face the barrier between them and the unsuspecting Decepticons raiding yet another human facility.

As he put his hands on top of the barrier, ready to heft himself up, Jazz sent Prowl a fleeting smirk. "Just think," he purred, "at least we don't need to worry 'bout a Halloween costume this year." And then he was over, with Prowl close behind, growling faintly. Jazz _grinned_, and raised his voice as he posed as dramatically as possible. "In the name of love and justice, Sailor Jazz is here! By the light of the Crescent Moon, we'll punish you!"

Prowl just glared at the gawking Decepticons, leveled a sparkling staff at them, and ground out, "Moon Shadow Sickle Revelation." The purple and black beam that erupted blasted satisfyingly in to the crowd, almost enough to make up for the sparkles. Almost.

Prowl decided that when it was his time to return to the Matrix, he and Primus were going to have a _long_ talk.

A/N: My first attempt at Transformers fic, and it turns out to be crack. Who would've thought?

This is a response to the Prowl/Jazz LJ community's Halloween '09 challenge. There'll be twelve more parts coming, though not all connected to this 'verse. The challenge was thus: complete thirteen drabbles/sketches/photos/photo comics, one for each of the prompts. 'Crescent Moon' was 6th on the list, but I didn't think the order was all that important. You can lay the blame for this little piece of crack directly on Vejiraziel – known as Plantman-exe on Deviantart. She came up with the picture of Jazz and Prowl in sailor outfits, and the bunny just bit. (Search plantman-exe on Deviantart to find her work; the pic I'm referring to is in the Prowl/Jazz folder. Then go check out the rest of her stuff. She's got some serious skill.)

I'm a horrible person, I know. Magical Girl!Jazz doesn't seem to mind that much, though.


	2. Black Cat

**Black Cat**

_2 of 13 -- follows "Crescent Moon"_

"I don't think either of you quite understands what this entails."

Jazz regarded their current guest with a slight grin. "What's t' understand?" He asked. "We go out there, kick 'con aft, save the earth, an' go back t' base. All seems pretty straight-forward t' me."

"Well, yes, but…" She huffed, features screwing up in a grimace. Prowl, in a distant part of his processor, mused that that human-like gesture made the whole situation just that much more surreal. "You're so blasé about it! Why aren't you complaining? Kicking up a fuss? Throwing a…a pity party!" She shook her head in frustration.

"We're soldiers." Prowl said sharply, his optics focusing once more on their guest's diminutive form. "And officers, as well. We're well versed in both combat and protecting innocents. Moaning and bewailing our fates would hardly help the situation, and is unprofessional."

"'xactly." Jazz grinned, nudging his partner gently with his free arm. Prowl bore it with a long-suffering expression. "Ain't nothin' confusing about it."

"Conversing with a feline about the entire situation, however, is somewhat bizarre." Prowl admitted, regarding the black cat sitting daintily in Jazz's outstretched hand.

"Well," the cat said, offended dignity somewhat mollified, "at least _that's_ normal."

**A/N:** You know how in every Magical Girl series, the main character starts whining about how she doesn't have time to go save the world, or how she doesn't want to fight, etc etc?

It may be the acceptable way for Magical Girls to act, but it doesn't mean our mechs have to act like that. Even if it does throw their mascot off. Er. _Advisor._

And conversing with an earth cat is totally different than talking to Ravage or Steeljaw. Since earth cats aren't supposed to be sentient.


	3. Orange

**Orange**

_7 of 13_

_Follows 'Crescent Moon' and 'Black Cat'_

"Naw, really, Sunny. The orange, s'good look on ya. It…uh…"

"It _clashes_ with my _paint job_." The golden front liner seethed, yanking futilely at the bright orange miniskirt seemingly attached to his hip plates.

"But it's so _cute_ on you, bro!" Sideswipe tweaked the golden bow attached above Sunstreaker's aft, dancing out of the way of his twin's reach as Sunstreaker swiped at him with a growl. His own dark maroon skirt flared becomingly as he did so, and Jazz chuckled softly at the sight.

"Regardless, the…uniforms…are remarkably resistant to damage, so any attempts at destruction are in vain." Prowl said, his expression blank. Sunstreaker snorted, folding his arms over his chest. Sideswipe grinned cheekily.

"Already tested that, Prowl?" He asked with innocent optics.

"Yes." Prowl replied blandly, as Jazz snickered. Prowl had tested it repeatedly. (Jazz had helped. He'd had a bit more fun with it than Prowl had had by himself – and he was fairly sure Prowl had enjoyed it more when he helped, too. Not that Prowl would admit it, the slagger.) It seemed that the only way to remove any of the cosmetic changes the transformation created was to transform back to normal.

The twins wandered off by themselves shortly after, bickering amiably between themselves, and Jazz leaned against Prowl's side, still grinning. "Admit it," he murmured in to Prowl's audial, "ya were just as amused with Sunny as 'Sides an' me."

The corner of Prowl's lip plates twitched up. "Perhaps." He murmured back. Jazz snickered softly. "Misery does love company, after all."

__________________________________________________________________________________________________________

A/N: I swear I'm done with the Magical Girl!AU. Really. .;; Originally, I was picking my brains over this prompt, and then 'orange skirt' popped up. I was _going_ to do someone with orange in his paint job (ie: Blaster), but then Sunstreaker started whining about how the stupid skirt was clashing with his paint job, and, well, it kinda snowballed from there.

Repeat to self, I will not turn the Autobots in to a magical girl team, I will not turn the Autobots in to a magical girl team… *shot*

Lucretzia: Somehow I don't think this is what you had in mind when you were thinking of the Twins' reactions. XD;

I suppose I ought to have some sort of disclaimer in here, huh. Transformers does not belong to me, I'm just borrowing the characters for a bit. I swear I'll give them back when I'm done...


	4. Pumpkin

Pumpkin

_4 of 13_

_Warnings: Mech/mech innuendo_

The Ark had been transformed in to a giant pumpkin. (Sunstreaker, of all bots, came up with the solution to the awkward problem of converting an ovoid starship in to a bulbous organic plant – he ordered orange rope to be gathered up to the top from the ground at regular intervals, mimicking the sections of an organic pumpkin. At the top, the ropes met and tied around the 'stem' – the outcropping antenna at the top – which had been painted brown. Sideswipe had called it stupid, but his brother just clocked him over the head. Their human friends had been loud in their appreciation, which seemed to have somewhat appeased Sunstreaker's vanity, so all was well.)

That wasn't the surprising thing.

All the minibots had acquired brown mouse ears. This wasn't really the surprising thing either – all though it was somewhat surprising that certain victims hadn't managed to get them removed. (Huffer had been heard grumbling that the twins shouldn't be allowed anywhere near bonding agents created by the humans. Ratchet had managed to confiscate Sideswipe's Crazy Glue after the fact; however, he had the feeling the hellion still had some remaining stashed elsewhere.)

Not even the fact that Prowl had acquired a faint sheen of sparkles to his doorwings, and was conspicuously carrying around a white stick topped with a golden star with ribbons trailing was even quite as surprising. (Everyone knew Jazz had somehow talked him in to it, but no one knew quite _how_. Prowl wasn't talking, and neither was Jazz. The expression on Jazz's face when asked about it, however, would make anyone wary. He could outdo Megatron when it came to crazed evil grins.)

No, the surprising thing had been Jazz entering battle with the Decepticons wearing a sheer ball gown and plastic heels. (He had wanted glass, but they hadn't been able to get them strong enough in time. All of Wheeljack's prototypes had crushed under Jazz's pedes. Jazz had been understandably upset, but the plastic looked almost as good.) In the stunned silence the followed his arrival, Jazz launched himself at Megatron, grabbing his hands and twirling him in to a rocky outcropping with a gleeful "Mah Prince!" The silence was broken by the distinct sound of laughter, as Starscream nearly fell out of the sky, cackling loudly.

"Starscream! Stop that infernal racket and get that Autobot!" Megatron was wedged firmly in to the rocks, and either his fusion cannon had been knocked offline or he'd simply forgotten about it, since he made no effort to fire it. The rest of the army watched in stunned horror as Starscream just laughed louder. Jazz affected mock outrage, and he whipped off one of his heels and chucked it at the flailing warlord.

"Fragger! You promised me f'rever!"

"I promised you nothing, you imbecilic Autobot! When I get my hands on you –"

From some distance away, the remaining officers of the Ark that had been on the battlefield watched the ensuing pandemonium. Prowl covered his optics with one hand, cycling quietly through his vents.

"That's it. I'm banning Disney movies from the Ark." He said firmly.

"That's…probably a good idea." Optimus agreed mildly.

"Aw, c'mon Prowl. Halloween's jus' once a year. An' ya can't deny this ain't workin'. Ol' Megs is too busy yellin' an' makin' a fuss to cause any real damage. An' the cons are too busy laughin' or starin' in horror."

Prowl reluctantly conceded Ironhide's point, before ordering the rest of the army to attack while the enemy was distracted. Then he opened a private link to Jazz's comm. _::Jazz, retreat.::_

_::Aw, but Prowl…::_

_::Now, Jazz. Or I'm reneging on our agreement.::_

_::Harsh, Prowler. Alright, I'm movin'. Tonight better be worth it.::_ His tone was more affectionate than anything, laced with anticipation. Prowl nearly chuckled aloud, but restrained himself. He had an image to maintain, after all.

_::Oh, I think you'll find it satisfactory.::_ Prowl replied confidently, a less than innocent edge to his words. _::Don't forget the handcuffs.::_

Jazz had to work hard to keep his engine from revving as he retreated from a still shouting Megatron. Wouldn't do to give anyone the wrong idea.

_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

**A/N: **Apparently I have a thing for sticking Jazz in women's clothing. Uh. Well, it wouldn't happen if he didn't go so _willingly_…yeah, this is complete crack, and not to be taken seriously at all.


	5. Ghost

**Ghost  
**_3 of 13_

No one was quite certain _where_ Sideswipe had found the giant parachute. (Red Alert had made a sound that was remarkably similar to 'Swindle', but everyone ignored him. Even if there was a somewhat decent chance he was right, it wasn't really _that_ important. The Decepticons weren't going to invade with a large piece of cloth. And it was a nice parachute.) Halloween was coming up quickly, and once the concept of the holiday had been explained to him, he had embraced it whole-heartedly. Prowl was of the opinion that the red front liner was simply looking for an excuse to plan even more outrageous pranks, and had been keeping a wary optic on him. Whatever the parachute was for, he was sure it wasn't good. So when Sideswipe had flung it over a surprised Fireflight's head, he had been ready to intervene.

"There!" Sideswipe grinned, stepping back to admire his handiwork. "You're all ready for Halloween."

Slingshot, who had been about ready to storm forward on Sideswipe in defense of his brother, stopped abruptly. "What do you mean?" He demanded. Fireflight turned towards the sound of his voice, but with the parachute covering him so completely, he couldn't see anything.

"He needed a costume." Sideswipe explained innocently. "And now he has one!"

"And what's he supposed to be?" Prowl asked dryly from his place among the small crowd of mechs who had gathered to watch the spectacle.

"Why Prowl, I'm surprised you don't recognize it!" Sideswipe grinned. "He's a ghost, of course. Humans throw sheets over their kids and call them spirits. A sheet wouldn't work for us, but hey, I'm creative like that."

"A ghost?" Fireflight said thoughtfully. "You mean like that movie we watched last week?"

"Yup."

Fireflight stood still for a moment, and then abruptly lurched in to Slingshot. "Boo!" He said, as they fell to the ground with a clatter. Slingshot cursed and grumbled, but helped his brother up. Fireflight immediately struck out towards the crowd of mechs, giggling madly as he bumped in one after another.

"You forgot the eyeholes, Sideswipe." Prowl observed.

Sideswipe smirked. "Oops. Imagine that."

Jazz came up beside Prowl, deftly sidestepping the bumbling Aerialbot. He grinned at his friend, and started singing softly, "Fireflight, the Friendly Ghost, the friendliest ghost you know…"

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

**A/N:** Fireflight is one of my favourite characters, thanks to fandom -- specifically Akisawana's "I Think It's Going to Rain Today" and Thing With No Talent's "Wing Nuts". He's just so _cute_! Also, Sideswipe apparently likes to take over my stories. *bats him away*

Casper the Friendly Ghost does not belong to me (and if you are unaware of what it is, you are either very young, or very deprived). And yes, it was around during this time frame -- just not it's live action incarnation.


	6. Costumes

**Costumes**_  
5 of 13_  
_Follows "Crescent Moon"_

"Nice costume." Carly grinned, her smile sharp. "The blue really brings out your visor, Jazz."

Twirling in place, Jazz returned her smile, striking a saucy pose. "Ya think? 'M kinda fond of it m'self. The collar felt a bit weird at first, but once ya get used to it, s'not that bad. Kinda classy."

The blonde laughed. "You look like a sailor's wet dream come to life. It's very fetishlike."

Jazz wiggled his hips at her, and then twisted around to get a glance at his aft. "Be honest. Are th' bows too much?" Carly giggled, and then clapped her hands over a snort. Her eyes danced as she tried valiantly to hold further laughter back.

"My eyes! _My eyes!_" Spike wasn't doing nearly as well, and was covering his eyes with both hands. "Jazz, buddy, _why_, for the love of God!"

"We-ell," Jazz drawled, "'s a funny story…"

"Jazz, I _know_ you know the meaning of discretion." Spike peeked between his fingers at the new voice, and then yelped. Prowl was standing in the doorway, regarding his fellow officer with a flat look. Carly choked.

"N-nice skirt." She gasped. Prowl inclined his head at her, and then looked back at Jazz, his entire being radiating a Not Pleased vibe.

"Jazz." He warned. The mech in question just grinned at him, unrepentant.

"C'mon Prowler. If ya got it, flaunt it!"

Spike whimpered, and Carly, regaining her equilibrium, patted his shoulder. Obviously Jazz had somehow talked Prowl in to this whole thing. Of course, just _how_ he had talked him in to a miniskirt…Carly bit her lip. Bad girl. Don't go there. Take care of the boyfriend first, _then_ have inappropriate thoughts about the mechs. "There, there." She soothed Spike, shooting Jazz and Prowl a wry grin as she gently steered the young man away. "Let's get you something to take the edge off."

"My brain is broken." Spike moaned.

_____________________________________________________________________________________

**A/N: **Aaaand it's the return of the Magical Bots! I really do enjoy them too much to be entirely healthy. So does Carly, apparently.


	7. Thirteen

**Thirteen**_  
13 of 13  
Follows "Crescent Moon"_

Thirteen. There were _thirteen_ mechs infected by this…upgrade. Thankfully, Prime seemed to have escaped the insanity – Prowl wasn't entirely certain his processor could handle seeing his superior in the uniform they had all acquired. Besides which, who knew how the Matrix would react to the energy (he refused to use the term 'magic'; this entire situation may be illogical, but slag if he'd start giving in to local superstitions) their transformations produced. Even still, thirteen upgraded bots made things around the Ark interesting. As the most senior officer amongst the bots upgraded, Prowl found himself taking charge of the ragtag group. Jazz was always there to lend a helping hand, of course, but sometimes it seemed he went along too easily with the shenanigans the skirted crew got in to. Sometimes, Prowl felt he was the only sane one amongst them all, and sometimes he wondered if any of them could be considered sane at all, himself included. Taking another datapad from the stack in front of him, Prowl attempted to pull his scattered thoughts together and focus on his reports. Who knew when the next crises would occur.

Sooner rather than later, Prowl decided wryly as a blue-skirted mech whirled in to the room.

"Prowl! I'm sorry to disturb you, I know you're really busy and all, you've got tons of extra duties now that we've got this extra team and it seemed like you were busy enough _before_ this—"

"Bluestreak." Prowl interrupted gently. Bluestreak stopped talking abruptly, his expression sheepish.

"Um. It's Bumblebee. He was practicing, and you know his upgrade doesn't do a lot of damage, it's more of a distraction-tactic, not that it's not really useful, like that time he used it against Thundercracker and—" Bluestreak cut off his vocalizer again at the quiet sound Prowl made – almost like how the humans cleared their throats – and cycled through his vents quickly. "Sunstreaker got in the way of a blast – it wasn't Bee's fault, honest! He wasn't expecting him there and then suddenly there Sunny was and you know how Sunny gets about his paint job and Bumblebee's upgrade does make an awful mess—"

Prowl held up his hand, and Bluestreak stopped obligingly. ::Bumblebee, what's your status?::

There was a long moment before Prowl's comm pinged back. ::Oh, I'm kind of just…hanging around.:: Bumblebee's tone was fairly sheepish, but he didn't sound damaged.

::And Sunstreaker?::

::…well…he's a little…upset right now. I didn't actually mean to hit him, but…well, you know Sunny.::

Prowl indulged himself for a brief moment to shutter his optics before replying. ::Indeed. What is your location?::

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Prowl took in the tableau before him and resisted the urge to turn around and go back to the Ark. Beside him, Bluestreak's shoulders slumped in relief. "We made it in time. You'll fix things, right Prowl? I mean, of course you will, you always do, I just hope Sunny doesn't have to spend time in the brig, because he didn't actually hurt 'Bee, and everyone's okay, well except maybe Sunny's paint job, but that's easily fixed, and…"

::Inferno,:: Prowl commed, tuning out the gunner, ::Could you please meet me at these coordinates? We require your services.::

::Sure thing, Prowl.:: Inferno's voice was inquisitive. ::'s'it regardin' th' _special_ team?::

::Yes, I'm afraid so.::

::Alright, jus' lemme ditch Red. He still gets a little jumpy aroun' that.::

::Thank you, Inferno.:: Prowl cut the link, and glanced back at the skirted mechs in the clearing. Sunstreaker was liberally doused with sparkles. The light caught on the individual specks of glitter splattered across his frame in a way that would be almost pretty, if it wasn't so jarring. He was currently prowling the clearing, murder in his optics. Sideswipe was no help at all; he was leaning against a tree trunk and giggling hysterically at his twin. Obviously, he was finding far too much amusement with the situation, as usual. Bumblebee was nowhere in sight, and Prowl wasn't entirely certain if this was comforting or alarming. Bluestreak was still cheerfully nattering on, and Hound was seated on a rock, his normally blue optics flashing the bright green that signaled he was using his upgrade. Prowl sent a private comm to the holograph specialist, wary of Sunstreaker still storming around the clearing. ::Hound. Where is Bumblebee?::

Hound's gaze flickered up to him briefly, before going back to their task. ::Up in the tree. I'm keeping him hidden just in case.::

The _tree_? Well, Prowl supposed that staying out of reach made a lot of sense, but how did the minibot manage to get up there in the first place…?

Just then, Inferno pulled in to the clearing, transforming as he did so. Sunstreaker spun around and growled at him, but Inferno just grinned easily at him. "Time to cool off, Sunny!" He drawled cheerfully, and leveled his hose at him.

As Prowl moved forward to help restrain the now soaking wet (and obviously angry) Lamborghini, a stray thought crossed his processor. Thirteen. Primus, could the Ark _handle_ any more?

_______________________________________________________________________________

**A/N:** This came about from a conversation with chili_dance on the PxJ comm, regarding Bumblebee and sparkles. Granted, her original comment was how Bumblebee was the sparkly one, but...this popped up instead. And uh...yeah, I guess I turned the Autobots in to a Magical Girl team. I'm going to hell, I know. Poor Prowl.

I named eight of the thirteen magical!bots. Anyone want to guess who the rest are?


	8. Fog

**Fog**  
_10 of 13  
Follows "Crescent Moon"_

Smoke hung about the room in a thick fog. Jazz waved it away as he stepped inside, coughing to clear his intakes. "'Jack? Y'alright there?"

"Oh, hey Jazz." An arm waved haphazardly from the smoke, and Jazz made his way towards it, carefully stepping over stray shrapnel. He sounded all right, but then, Wheeljack also tended to sound cheerful even when missing an arm. Now _that_ had been an interesting cycle; Ratchet's curses had been heard from the other side of the Ark. Wheeljack had borne it with his usual good humor, while almost all of the other members of their crew had stayed clear of the medic. Even Prime had tiptoed around Ratchet with amused resignation.

Hopefully Wheeljack hadn't lost a limb this time around. Ratchet in that bad of a mood was as scary as the Pit.

"I'm fine, I'm fine." An arm waved again, dispersing some of the smoke. Jazz finally reached the inventor, who was looking a little worse for the wear, but thankfully didn't seem to be missing any parts. "Just miscalculated a bit."

Jazz chuckled. "A bit, huh?" He asked, glancing around the lab. There were pieces of something metallic all over the floor, and the walls were definitely more singed than normal. Wheeljack grinned ruefully, his headfins flashing.

"I'm still in one piece, aren't I?" He said cheerfully. Laughing outright, Jazz hauled him up to his feet. Wheeljack wobbled a little, one hand on Jazz's forearm. Ratchet chose that moment to come barreling in through the open door.

Relief flashed across his faceplates only briefly before Ratchet turned the full force of his glare on Wheeljack. "Primus, 'Jack, I can't let you out of my sight for a nanoclick!" He snarled, stomping forward. Jazz prudently stepped out of range as Ratchet grabbed the inventor by one of his headfins and started scanning him. Wheeljack winced slightly at the yank, but otherwise continued to smile as he took the abuse.

"C'mon, Ratch, it's not that bad." Wheeljack said. Ratchet made a rude sound, but continued to scan. "It's nothing a quick trip to the washracks and a quick recharge won't cure."

"I'll be the judge of that." Ratchet returned icily. "Who's the medic here, you or me?"

"You, of course."

"Glad _someone_ thinks so. Of course, it's not like you bots ever listen to me, always finding new and exciting ways to blow yourselves up. Oh wait, that's just _you_!"

"I was perfectly safe." Wheeljack told him. "I was transformed to minimize any possible damage."

"Yes, I see that." Ratchet replied, his optics narrowed as he took in the battered green skirt still clinging to Wheeljack's hip plates. The red piping was just barely visible through all the soot stains and scorch marks, and yet the material was still remarkably resilient. He poked hard at the bright blue bow clinging haphazardly to Wheeljack's chest. "And despite the near miraculous properties of those upgrades, we _still_ don't know much about them. For all you know, it could've caused that explosion in the first place! Blindly putting your faith in to something we have so little information on is a good way to get yourself slagged, and I don't want to have to be the one to put together your sorry carcass! Again!"

Jazz slipped towards the door as Ratchet continued on in the same vein, opening a comm link as he went. ::Jazz to Prowl.::

::Prowl here.::

::What do ya think th' chances are of gettin' Ratch in to the whole upgrade thing?::

There was a long pause before Prowl replied. ::Incalculable. We still don't know precisely what causes certain mechs to gain the upgrade.:: Prowl's voice turned dry. ::And I wouldn't advise it, in any case. Ratchet tends to put enough fear in to our bots as it stands right now, never mind if he was upgraded.::

::Yeah, but just think.:: Jazz was grinning widely now as he palmed the lab door shut behind him, Ratchet's rant fading behind him. ::We could throw him at the 'cons, and the war'd be over within the joor!::

::Yes, but would we survive afterwards?:: Prowl retorted, amusement thick in his voice.

**A/N:** This is for MarySuofYay on (who caused me to laugh hysterically at her PM for nearly two minutes straight; it was all I could do to not reply in the affirmative, I swear), and **hecate_19** on the PxJ comm, who both guessed Wheeljack as one of the bots to be upgraded. I guess he just makes too much sense as a Magical!Bot XD;


	9. OMAKE

OMAKE_  
Shattered Glass AU-verse in which Rumble doesn't die. Because I said so. Also, for those unaware, SG has heroic Decepticons and evil Autobots, and one very confused G1 Cliffjumper caught in the middle. Yeah, it's kinda filled of awesome._

The battle was getting fiercer, and Cliffjumper swore as he dodged an incoming spray of laser fire at the last astrosecond. He dove behind some cover, returning fire as he went. Fighting against the Autobots still fragged up his processor a bit, and this was no time for that. Things were going downhill, fast; even without any tactical programming, the time-lost Autobot could see it.

Soundwave shot him a harried look from a few meters away. His once gleaming white paint was looking decidedly worse for the wear, scuffed and scorched. "We gotta pull out, fast!" He shouted to Cliffjumper. Only two of the cassettes were with him; Rumble and Frenzy were working overtime to provide cover fire, with Rumble shouting insults at the bots as his twin stayed quiet and focused.

"Tell them that!" Cliffjumper retorted, sending out another volley of fire.

A stray shot slammed through their defense, spinning Rumble half way out of their cover with a shot to his side. Frenzy grabbed him and yanked his offlining brother back under cover, his hands plunging in to circuitry as he tried to fix the damage. Cliffjumper cursed loudly and fired off another quick round, risking a glance at the cassettes. Rumble was out for the count, his frame sparking something fierce. If they didn't get out of here fast, they'd all be going down. Keeping up a steady stream of curses, Cliffjumper pulled back out of sight of the enemy, reaching up to his faction symbol. He really didn't want to do it, but it looked there was no choice, now…

Frenzy, his hands full of his twin, shot Cliffjumper a quick distracted look. The red minibot seemed to be fumbling with something on his chest. He returned his attention to Rumble and finished rigging a quick patch job as Soundwave covered them both from increasingly persistent enemy fire. Rumble's optics onlined and he nearly shot up before leaning heavily against his fellow cassette.

"Anyone get the number of that skimmer?" He mumbled. Frenzy was just about to reply when there was a brief flash of red light. Rumble winced, shuttering his optics again as Frenzy and Soundwave shot alarmed looks towards Cliffjumper's location…only to nearly reboot their optics at the appearance of a very angry minibot emerging from the sudden fog of some sort of reflective substance.

It looked like Cliffjumper – that is, if Cliffjumper's frame was a lot more streamlined and sleek, and had gained additional thin black armor that flapped over his plating (it didn't really look all that strong, but it was almost pretty, with a definite sheen. But why would anyone want additional armor covering only their collar and hip plates? And what were the strange white pieces over his chestplate? They looked rather soft and flimsy; almost organic).

Cliffjumper-who-was-not stomped out in to the open, laser fire reflecting harmlessly off his (her?) chestplate. With a snarl, he (she?) raised his—her—a gun and fired off a potent blast of something red, shimmery, and very explosive at the now gawking Autobots. "Go!" The voice was very definitely feminine, and Soundwave pushed his confused thoughts out of the way as he gathered his cassettes and took the opening provided, retreating as fast as he could. The minibot covered them all, firing off a couple more shots before turning tailpipe and heading for safety.

Once they were out of range, Soundwave slowed down to get a good luck at their savior. "Cliffjumper?" He asked uncertainly.

"Yeah." The red minibot looked very disgruntled, her arms folding uncomfortably over her chassis.

Rumble, who had been drifting in and out of coherency, chose that moment to focus on the situation. "Hey," he slurred, peering out from Soundwave's arms, "who's the femme?" Frenzy shushed him, and Rumble gave him a half-hearted shove. "Whassa pretty femme like you doin' in a place like this?"

Cliffjumper visibly tensed, but ignored him. "I don't really want to talk about it." He said to Soundwave's unspoken question. "Let's just get back to base for now." Soundwave nodded agreement, trying to keep his curiosity under control. Eventually, some of it leaked out.

"…there's some weird kinda organic material tied around your chassis."

"Yeah, I know. It's called 'leather'. Apparently it's made of the skins of dead non-sentient organics."

"That's totally disgusting!"

"Hey, you think I haven't tried to get rid of it? The stuff won't come off!"

"I can help you out, if you'd like, pretty femme." Frenzy offered woozily with a sad attempt at a leer.

Cliffjumper looked at Soundwave. "Are you sure I can't shoot him?"

"I'd rather you didn't, mech." Soundwave paused, looking embarrassed. "Uh, I mean, femme. No, uh…"

Cliffjumper growled and stomped ahead. Why, of all the bots with those pit-spawned fragging upgrades, did he have to have the one that changed his frame? Primus hated him, that's why.

__________________________________________________________________________________________________

**A/N:** Once again, you can blame this on **MarySuofYay**, who likes to send me random PM's to mess with my brain and force the bunnies to attack. As this has no mention of Prowl or Jazz at all, this isn't part of the Halloween challenge, but you guys get to see it here anyways.

Yes, Cliffjumper is a Starlight. Yes, this was ripped deliberately off of Naoko Takeuchi's _Sailormoon_ (even more so than usual). Yes, I really _am_ going to the Special Hell. …I'm dragging all of you down with me, FYI.

Also, SG!Soundwave is fragging _awesome_, and sadly, this fic does not properly show his awesomeness. I blame the crack that is Magical!Cliffjumper scrambling his processors. But he's totally righteous, man.


	10. Graveyard

**Graveyard**  
_12 of 13  
Follows "Crescent Moon" and "Black Cat"_

It was as silent as a graveyard on the battlefield. That was how the saying went, wasn't it? Something about a resting place for the dead, anyways. All optics were on the unassuming black feline perched on Jazz's shoulder, who in turn was staring at Prowl, her head tilted to the side.

"So…" the cat (Tranquility, Jazz reminded himself. Her name was Tranquility, even if she tended to be anything _but_) said slowly, her tone honestly confused, "you are _not_ in love with that one over there?" She pointed towards Starscream with her paw, and the Seeker narrowed his optics with a disdainful snort. "Or any other member of the opposite faction?"

"Certainly not." Prowl replied stiffly, his doorwings held high.

"And…" she looked up at Jazz, who was grinning down at her, "you harbor no such feelings for any of the Decepticons, either?"

"Nope!" Jazz replied cheerfully. "Sorry 'Screamer, ya just ain't my type."

"Somehow I think I'll survive the disappointment." Starscream's voice was dripping with sarcasm, and some of the tension started to slowly disperse from the two groups. Jazz's grin turned sharp as he tilted his head in the Air Commander's direction mockingly.

"So then… he must have unquenchable feelings for one of you two!" Tranquility said, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. Starscream's screech of rage was her only response, as there was a sudden mass clearing of intakes as nearly everyone in hearing mysteriously started struggling with their vocalizers.

"That…that'd be kinda creepy, actually." Jazz finally managed, trying to keep the wide grin off his face.

"But," Tranquility said desperately, her blue eyes wide as she flicked her gaze between her charges and their enemies, "but…that's not how it's supposed to work!"

"How, precisely, is it supposed to 'work', then?" Prowl asked icily.

"Cross-faction romance." She replied matter-of-factly. "It…it's _traditional_. One side falls in love with the other, and everyone tries to dissuade them, and in the end it's their love that turns the tide of battle and causes the downfall of whatever evil they're trying to defeat." Tranquility glared at them all. "That's the way these things work!"

"Welp, that wouldn't really work for us." Jazz explained. "'Cause if I took a fancy t' any other mech, Prowl'd get jealous. And if Prowler here decided he wanted t' jump some other mech, well." Jazz's grin turned downright feral. "I'd have t' take steps against the competition, y' see." He paused thoughtfully. "Unless he jus' wanted t' roleplay. That can be kinda fun." He leered at Prowl, who covered his optics with one hand.

"You're completely shameless, Jazz."

"Yeah, but I don't really hear ya complainin', babe."

There was a long pause as everyone on the field struggled with the mental images produced. Finally, Starscream broke the silence. "Ugh. That was more than I really needed to know about your interfacing life."

"You're just jealous 'cause you ain't gettin' any, Screamer."

"Like the Pit he's not." Skywarp grinned cheekily, and Thundercracker slapped him upside the helm.

___________________________________________________________________________________________

**A/N:** Honestly, I have nothing against cross-faction romances. They can be really fun. But mocking them can be really fun too XD  
And come on, how often does a bad guy from a magical girl series fall in love with the heroine, and (eventually) repent their ways? Or, at least try to kidnap them a lot. That happens too.


	11. Trick

**Trick**  
_9 of 13_

"He _tricked_ us!"

"Yes, Jazz, we've already clarified that." Prowl was as calm and unruffled as ever, his voice betraying not even a hint of annoyance at the fact that the two of them had been tricked and cajoled (and ultimately locked) in to the small room.

Really. A storage closet. Jazz was a little miffed. Some people just had no imagination.

Jazz whirled around to face Prowl, prodding his chestplate with a sharp jab. "We are locked in a storage closet! An' even _I_ can't get it open! There's somethin' seriously wrong with that right there." Prowl nodded agreeably, his optics on Jazz's finger. "I've gotten out of tighter places than this before, and yet _this_ fraggin' door won't budge. I'm about ready to toss an explosive at it."

"That might prove unwise." Prowl said mildly. "Ratchet would be most unpleased about repairing any self-inflicted damage it would cause, never mind the damage to the Ark itself."

Jazz blew air through his intakes derisively, and Prowl shuttered his optics briefly. "Well, maybe certain bots shouldn't go around lockin' us down! This is ridiculous, why in the Pit would Prime lock us in here in the first place? If this is about last—"

"Because I asked him to."

"—cycle, this is just beyond – wait, what?"

Prowl's lip plates quirked upwards at the pole-axed expression Jazz was wearing. "I said," he answered gently, poking the saboteur in the chest plate, "I asked Prime to lock us in here, secure enough that you couldn't escape for a few breems."

Jazz frowned. "Why wouldja do somethin' like that? If y'needed to talk to me, you could of asked."

"I could have." Prowl agreed. "But I wanted to make sure there were no interruptions."

"So ya asked Optimus t' lock us in a storage closet."

"Well," Prowl admitted, "it was originally his idea, but I don't think he was entirely serious about it."

"But apparently you were."

Prowl nodded. "Yes, it seemed to fit my purpose nicely."

"An' what purpose is that? Slag, Prowl, it almost seems like y'were plannin' something _nefarious_, like jumpin a bot—" Jazz was joking when he said it, but apparently Prowl was not, as he chose that moment to slip his fingers in to Jazz's grill and pull him forward in to a very firm kiss.

Jazz floundered for a moment, his lip plates going slack in surprise. Prowl pressed his advantage by slipping his glossa in to Jazz's mouth, and Jazz quickly lost all rational thought after that.

It was with definite reluctance that Prowl broke the kiss a bare few moments after. "Precisely." He murmured, and Jazz blinked at him in confusion.

"Bwuh?"

Prowl smiled slightly. "You were right. I _did _request Prime to lock us in here with the intention of 'jumping' you."

"You…"

"We've been dancing around each other for vorns," Prowl continued to Jazz's bemusement, "and Prime had been expressing some discontent about this fact. I agreed. I had refrained from saying anything prior due to the situation of the war, but Prime raised some very valid points, and I'm confident we can work things out properly." Jazz still didn't seem to have regained his vocalizer, so Prowl decided another demonstration was in order. He kissed him again. Jazz responded readily enough to _that_.

~*~*~*~*~*~

"Wait," Jazz gasped, pulling back out of the kiss. Prowl regarded him with an almost _sulky_ expression. It was…strangely attractive. _No, Jazz. Focus._ "You already _knew_? That I liked ya?"

"Well, yes. You were quite obvious."

Jazz wasn't certain if he should be offended by that or not. Prowl neatly solved that by pulling him back in for another kiss. _This looks like it might become a habit._ Jazz thought to himself, somewhat giddy. He couldn't really bring himself to complain. Prowl was a pretty decent kisser, for someone who was rumored to be practically a temple priest when it came to relationships. _All the more for me! _He decided gleefully, his hands sliding up Prowl's chassis as he returned the kiss with interest.

~*~*~*~*~*~

"So…" Jazz murmured, tracing lightly along raised doorwings. Prowl shivered in response. "A storage closet?"

"It seemed appropriate."

"Yeah? How so?"

"Well," Prowl began with a perfectly straight face, "Carly had mentioned something about the two of us needing to 'come out of the closet', and we couldn't really do that until we had been in a closet in the first place."

Jazz stared at him for several long seconds before letting out a loud peal of laughter. Prowl gave him a small smile in response, before leaning in and kissing the laughter away.

~*~*~*~*~*~

"Prowl?"

"Yes, Jazz?"

"I think we need to shove Optimus in a closet. Yanno, as revenge. We can drag Elita back from Cybertron an' shove her in with him."

"That sounds acceptable."

"Ultra Magnus, too."

"We might need some aid with that."

Jazz grinned against his helm. "Yeah, but I'm sure we'll get _lots _of volunteers."

_______________________________________________________

**A/N:** Because Optimus is a huge enabler. *nods sagely*

I have an unhealthy obsession with closet fics in any fandom, and I hadn't yet written one in _this_ fandom, thus, it had to be done.

As to the 'mechs kissing' debate, I'm pretty interchangeable. I mean, we share so much of the same body language, why not kissing too? I'll probably turn out something eventually with an alternative too, just to see if I can. I'm flexible like that.


	12. Spider Webs

**Spider webs  
**_9 of 13  
Follows "Crescent Moon" and "Thirteen"_

"Wow." Bumblebee gazed down with appreciation. His skirted teammates were crowded around him, looking on. He looked back up at Trailbreaker with a grin. "That's pretty neat, actually. Has Beachcomber seen it yet?"

Trailbreaker fidgeted, embarrassment written all over his faceplates. "No, not yet. I only just figured out how to do it properly. Hound was helping me."

Hound chuckled. "Not much." He said cheerfully. "You almost had it yourself, 'Breaker. A little longer and you would've got it down fine."

"I should probably work on my aim, though."

"I dunno." Sideswipe said. "I think your aim was _perfect._"

"You would." Wheeljack pointed out, and snickers broke out among the gathered mechs.

"Yes, while this is all quite fascinating," Prowl said from the ground, annoyance clear in his tone, "a little help would be appreciated."

Jazz grinned, prodding Prowl's side. He pulled his finger away, rubbing the sticky substance that clung to it thoughtfully. "I'll get you out of it, Prowler." He offered. "Jus' lemme get you back to quarters, first."

"If I let you do that, it'll be hours before I actually get free. Thank you, no."

Sideswipe and Sunstreaker let out twin catcalls, and the rest of the mechs snickered.

"Sorry, Prowl. I'll have you out in a moment. It shouldn't be that hard to remove…" Wheeljack hummed thoughtfully to himself as he regarded their superior officer.

"It really does kind of look like you're caught in spider webbing." Hound observed. "Arachnids trap their prey in material much like this."

"It bonds pretty tight, doesn't it?" Bluestreak noted, tugging at the strands clinging to Prowl's chassis. "It would be pretty useful for restraining someone. I mean, it's already restraining Prowl, and even you can't pull free from it, can you? Not without help, at least!"

Hound exchanged a look with Mirage as Bluestreak blithely chattered on. Mirage glanced down at their confined superior, and then gave the oblivious Trailbreaker a considering look. "Well," Hound chirped suddenly, grabbing Trailbreaker's arm, "I think we should give 'Breaker some more practice."

"Much more practice." Mirage added, taking the black mech's other arm and tugging him smoothly away from the others. "Far away from here."

"Uh, guys? I appreciate the help, but don't you think we should help—"

"Nah, we got this." Jazz said, as a few of the others started snickering. He smirked at the trio. "Have fun! Don't do anything I wouldn't do!"

"Because that narrows it down so much, Jazz." Sideswipe snorted to full-fledged laughter of the assembled mechs.

"Would you _please_ get me out of this?" Prowl demanded. Wheeljack just shook his head, lights blinking merrily as he bent back over the agitated technician. Jazz admired Prowl's prone form for a moment before opening a private comm. link to his lover.

::I still think y' should lemme take you back to our quarters.:: He teased. ::Yer hot all restrained like that.::

::Just keep talking,:: Prowl retorted, ::and your _libido _will be forcefully restrained.::

::Ooh, I love it when y' talk dirty to me.::

_________________________________________________________________

**A/N:** Trailbreaker is for Hecate_19 on LJ, and also because I decided that spider webs could be the equivalent of his force fields. I-it works in my brain, okay?

Hound/Mirage/Trailbreaker is _just because I can_. Because threesomes are the ultimate way to deal with love triangles.


	13. Treat

**Treat  
**_11 of 13  
Follows "Crescent Moon"  
Warnings for m/m and slight smuttiness, but nothing really graphic  
_

"Mm, you're all wrapped up like an energon treat. Guess I'll just have ta unwrap you."

"Jazz, we've – ah! – already established that the ad-additions to our armor c-caaaan't—"

Jazz chuckled, his voice smooth and low. "Yeah, but ya know what they say – 'if at first you don't succeed…'"

"'F-failure may be your style.'" Despite his words, Prowl arched as Jazz did _something_ in his seams. He bit back a whimper as Jazz smirked.

"Ooh, ouch. Them's fightin' words."

"I still don't see you succeeding in removing any of the upgrades." Prowl retorted bitingly. He was trying not to react, but slag if Jazz wasn't making it hard.

"Heh. Jus' be patient." The saboteur said, nimble fingers sliding up under Prowl's skirt. Prowl shivered despite himself; the armor seemed especially sensitive under the cloth. Curious, it had never—he gasped sharply as Jazz fingered the seam he encountered. "I wonder," Jazz murmured, "what'd happen if I overload ya while we're transformed. Since th' upgrades apparently have a lot t'do with will."

"Jazz—" Prowl began, but Jazz cut him off with an aggressive kiss, simultaneously twisting his fingers deeper in to Prowl's circuitry. Suddenly, thinking didn't seem quite so important anymore.

~*~*~*~*~*~

"Slag." Jazz murmured in to Prowl's audio sometime later. Prowl turned to give him a questioning look, his optics half-shuttered. He was halfway in to recharge already, and Jazz was about ready to follow him. "Was hopin' I could force a spontaneous transformation." Jazz explained. Prowl snorted in response.

"'Told you we couldn't without a proper transformation." He replied. "Speaking of which, we really should transform back to normal."

"I dunno." Jazz said thoughtfully. "I kinda like the sparkles, though." Prowl gave him a flat look, and pushed himself up off the berth.

"That's it, I'm transforming."

Jazz laughed and pulled him back down, wrapping his arms around his lover so he couldn't escape again. Prowl settled in to his embrace mock grumbling, but didn't touch his transformation brooch.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________

**A/N:** There is one more coming, but that'll be posted tomorrow morning. Somehow I managed to finish all of these with a half hour remaining before the deadline. Yay!


	14. Darkness

**Darkness  
**_1 of 13  
Follows "Black Cat" and "Orange"_

The darkness was absolute. It almost seemed to have a tangible presence, inky and thick. Even headlights couldn't seem to cut through it. Prowl hated to put the term to it, even now, but it almost seemed…supernatural in nature.

"Well," Jazz's voice came from somewhere to Prowl's right. He automatically tried to turn and focus on it. "Think it's time t' shine a bit a light around here." Jazz continued.

"C'mon Sunny, your turn!" Sideswipe was off to his left and a little bit behind him. So Sunstreaker should be…

"No." His voice was firm, resolute, and coming from Prowl's immediate left. There were other bots in the room as well, and Prowl was loathe to leave all of them in darkness any longer than they needed to be.

"Sunstreaker." Prowl said quietly. "I'm ordering you to use your upgrade."

There was a brief rebellious silence, and everyone waited in the darkness.

And then there was light. And a blindingly bright Sunstreaker, who was glowing fit to light up an entire city, a miniature supernova lighting up the space between his open hands. And an absolutely thunderous expression on his faceplates, just _daring_ anyone to say something.

"Here comes the sun…" Sideswipe dodged back as Sunstreaker lunged at him, laughing as he danced away from his glowing twin. "Here comes the sun, and I say it's all right!"

"Sometimes," Prowl said to no one in particular, "I wonder just _what_ factor was involved in each of our individual upgrades."

"'S like I always say," Jazz said cheerfully, stepping back to let the twins' race past him, "Primus has a whoppin' sense o' humor."

"Evidently."

"I'm walking on sunshine, yeah! And don't it feel _good_!"

"You won't be feeling good when I get through with you." Sunstreaker snarled, still carrying the light source. Shadows flickered rapidly around the room, momentarily leaving bots in darkness as the light was blocked. As a result, no one else saw Prowl's smile briefly light up his faceplates.

____________________________________________________________________________________

**A/N:** And that's the last one! Fitting that we end with the first prompt, don't you think?

The songs that Sides is singing are "Here Comes the Sun" by the Beatles, and "Walking on Sunshine" by Katrina and the Waves", respectfully. No copyright infringement is intended.

As for the Magical!Bots...I still have bunnies kicking around, so they'll likely return. I'm considering just continuing on this story ID, and changing the title to something more appropriate. Updates for that, however, will likely not be as quick as these were -- pretty much on a 'whenever inspiration strikes' basis. As well, I'm attempting my first Nanowrimo this year, so I'll be full up with writing for the next month. I might still get a few drabbles out, however -- probably whenever I get frustrated with the epic-in-the-making. It's supposed to be a Transformers fic - if you've read my 'Statistic', it's based on that 'verse. (Hopefully not quite as depressing, however. I'm not sure I can handle 50,000 words of that.) Wish me luck!


	15. Destiny

**Destiny**

It was a beautiful night. The clouds had parted, revealing a breath-taking full moon and a vista of twinkling stars scattered above in the heavens. Two mechs were out in a newly rain-washed field, enjoying the solitude. Or, they might have been, if it weren't for the orating cat.

"We have a grand Purpose," Tranquility was saying sanctimoniously, "to protect the innocent and vanquish the guilty; to uphold Truth and dispense Justice where and when it's needed. We must make a Stand against Evil wherever we might find it, even though it might cost us our lives."

"I'm too old for this slag."

"That's your excuse for everything." Jazz said cheerfully. Ironhide twisted around, tugging at the purple bow attached just above his aft.

"I _am_ too old for this." He insisted. "This kinda thing is more suited for you young mechs."

"What, the skirts? I think it makes you look _pretty_, 'Hide."

"Frag off."

"You have been chosen for a great Destiny." Tranquility continued over their banter. "Together with your friends, you must unite to protect the Earth from the Darkness that approaches. Only the Chosen fighting jointly as One can prevail!"

Ironhide ignored the preaching cat, and Jazz tuned her out with practiced ease. The speech had been interesting the first time, but Tranquility brought it out for every new mech inducted in to their team. She had never appreciated Jazz's attempts to spice it up, either. (Sideswipe, at least, had liked his rap. So had Bumblebee. Prowl had insisted he hadn't liked it at all, but Jazz wasn't fooled. He'd seen the minuscule smile that had nearly broken free.)

"This is stupid. Bumblebee shoots sparkles, for Primus' sake!"

"If it's stupid but works, it ain't stupid."

Ironhide grunted in response. "I s'ppose." He hefted the graceful red rod in his hands, eyeing it speculatively. "How'd ya say this here thing works again?"

Jazz grinned and slapped him on the back struts. "Welcome to the team, my mech."

"Are you two even _listening_?" Tranquility demanded.

* * *

**A/N:** And it lives again! Nano is seriously sapping my creativity -- and I don't even have the excuse that I'm getting a lot written. *prods at it*

Tranquility has the Habit of orating in Capital Letters. This is because it makes her sound Very Important. (Also, she hopes the capitalizing might make certain bots pay attention. So far it's not working, to her dismay.)

Jazz won't tell me exactly what he said in his rap, but he assures me it was much cooler than the Pokemon rap.


	16. Pink

**Pink**

"Why are we out here on this Primus-forsaken chunk of slag again?"

Starscream cycled an exasperated sigh through his vents. "Because," he told Skywarp testily, "We detected energy-readings similar to those ridiculous upgrades a few of the Autoscum are sporting. Our great and illustrious _Leader_ wants the power those upgrades grant for himself, so we're looking in to it."

"It's almost pretty from here." Thundercracker mused.

"What is?" Skywarp glanced around the moonscape. "All I see is rocks, rocks, and more rocks."

"The Earth, dumbaft." Thundercracker retorted.

"It's a planet." Starscream said dismissively. "Like thousands of others out there. Now are we going to get on with this, or are we going to stand around gawking like ground-bound glitches?" He transformed and jetted off in the direction of the highest readings. Thundercracker and Skywarp exchanged commiserating looks, and followed after.

Starscream wouldn't admit out loud that he, too, had once found the Earth pretty from space. But that was a lifetime ago.

* * *

The humans called this plain Mare Tranquillitatis, or the Sea of Tranquility. _Well,_ Starscream supposed ungraciously, _they got the 'Tranquil' part right, at least._ The basalt plains were as silent as death. They were some distance from any of the humans' landing points; it seemed the energy readings were coming from the exact center of the basin.

"Are we there yet?" Skywarp whined. Thundercracker slapped him upside his helm.

"Almost." Starscream said distractedly. The readings were suddenly screaming at him, and he searched the landscape for anything that seemed out of the ordinary.

"Well?" Thundercracker asked as Starscream came to a stop.

"It's coming from this point." Starscream replied. He scowled as he glanced around the near barren moonscape. The only thing in the area was a couple of large pieces of basalt tumbled haphazardly on the ground.

"There's nothing but a pile of rocks here." Skywarp said, and kicked the rocks in illustration. Starscream's readings suddenly skyrocketed, and a pillar of light erupted from the midst of the pile.

The seekers backed away from the light, weapons up and trained on it immediately. "Who's there? Show yourself!" Starscream demanded.

The figure that emerged looked very much like a human female, but even smaller than the ones they had come across on Earth. She was only about six inches in size, but with a fully adult body. She also didn't seem to have any issues existing within the thin to non-existent atmosphere of the Moon.

But the really surreal part would have to be the delicate butterfly wings extending from her back, fluttering gently and somehow keeping her aloft. _Since when are there tiny humans capable of flight?_ Starscream wondered somewhat hysterically.

"Greetings." The tiny woman said, spreading her hands before her. "I have been waiting for you."

Starscream kept his null ray on her. "Who are you? Why have you been waiting for us?" She smiled without a trace of fear. _Idiot._ Starscream scoffed to himself.

"I am the Guardian of this system." The woman replied serenely. "I have been waiting for you, as your coming has been foreordained."

Skywarp choked on a laugh, and Thundercracker elbowed him with a hiss. Starscream ignored them. "Foreordained? I don't believe in such nonsense."

"There is a great evil approaching." Obviously, she didn't care much _what_ he believed. "Will you be ready for it?"

"What kind of evil?" Thundercracker asked despite himself.

"Greater than anything the universe has ever seen." The woman replied solemnly.

Starscream snorted. "Right. Well then, how would you suggest we 'prepare' for it?" He sneered.

"Yeah, and what makes you think we care?" Skywarp piped up. "We follow the great Mega—" Starscream kicked him in the thrusters, and Skywarp shut up with a pout.

The woman merely smiled. "I have been waiting here, for you." She said. "To give you a gift, to aid you."

And then there was light.

* * *

"We return triumphant, oh great and _glorious_ Megatron!"

Megatron eyed his Seekers somewhat dubiously. "I see that, Starscream." He replied. "Those upgrades look as ridiculous on you as they do on the Autobots."

"Who cares what they look like, so long as they do the job?" Starscream retorted. He wasn't incredibly pleased with his new appearance (the pink and white skirts kept hiking up his aft, and it was a pain to fly in, never mind those ridiculous bows) but he certainly wasn't going to admit anything other than satisfaction to Megatron.

Skywarp seemed to actually _like_ his upgrade, the glitch. He kept twisting his hip plates back and forth, watching the purple and gold skirts flutter and flirt in the breeze. Thundercracker, on the other hand, kept trying to tug his red and gold skirts down, and looked quite embarrassed.

"Rejoice then, Starscream," Megatron said silkily, "for you will soon get the chance to prove that your new…upgrade…is worth the humiliation." Starscream bristled, but Megatron had already turned his attention to his waiting troops. "Decepticons, transform and rise up!"

* * *

The Autobots had been, at first, completely overwhelmed by the appearance of the upgraded Seekers, Soundwave noted in the midst of the battle. They rallied quickly, but the first few crucial moments while they gawked at the vibrantly skirted Seekers had cost them dearly.

"Thundercracker!" Megatron ordered, "Use your upgrade against the Autobots!"

Thundercracker shuttered his optics briefly, before stretching out a hand towards the handful of Autobots attempting to guard the lab-coated squishies and their machines. "Star Sonic Wall!"

"Thundercracker! What do you think you're doing?"

"It's not my fault!" Thundercracker insisted. The force field that had manifested as his upgrade stood strong against his attempts to bring it down, shielding the humans and their equipment (and their Autobot allies) within. "It wasn't supposed to keep us out, I swear!" He kicked at the shield, but that just seemed to make it stronger.

Starscream sneered. "Fool," he said haughtily, "You do it like _this_." He aimed his upgraded weapon at the shield and fired. A stream of pink energy burst from the modified gun and raced towards the shield.

Soundwave paused briefly in his assault on the Autobots. Were those stylized _hearts_ in the beam?

The workers within ducked for cover, the Autobots – the mini red one with the loud mouth and the especially human-loving yellow one, Soundwave noted briefly – shielding them with their own frames. They needn't have bothered. The bright pink beam bounced off of the shield and raced off at an angle – straight for Megatron. It impacted against the surprised Decepticon leader with a resounding _boom_.

For a moment, there was silence. Then: "STARSCREAM!"

"So," Jazz said conversationally, watching the Decepticon warlord, painted liberally with pink sparkles and heart marks, chase his skirted Second around the battlefield, "does this mean 'Screamer and the others are part of our team now?"

Prowl glared at him. "Don't even _joke_ like that."

* * *

**A/N:** Yeah, uh. Because Screamer's a prima donna? I-I don't even know.

For those wondering, the Magical!Seekers have skirts much like the Eternal skirts in the Sailormoon manga - the double-layer ones worn by the senshi. So, Starscream has pink top skirt and a gold under skirt, Skywarp has a purple top skirt with the gold under skirt, and Thundercracker has a red top skirt and gold under skirt.

As to _why_ the Magical Moon Fairy gave the Seekers their upgrades...well. You'll just have to wait and see! (W-what? There's going to be plot?)


	17. Rain

**Rain  
**_Precedes 'Pink' by a fair bit, but comes after 'Thirteen'_

The Decepticons had got them bad; a distraction earlier had drawn Prowl and his gang of lunar upgraded bots off to another corner of the Earth and kept them there. Cliffjumper and a handful of Autobots were attempting to hold off a second Decepticon strike force that was holding an elementary school hostage. While none of the children appeared to be hurt, they still didn't seem to be pleased with Blitzwing yelling at them. Cliffjumper had to admire the ones who were yelling back, even if it _was_ pretty stupid.

"Cliffjumper! Over here!"

Cliffjumper halted abruptly, scanning the field. "Who said that?" He demanded.

"Me!" A white blur bounced up in front of his optics. Cliffjumper cursed, backpedaling and bringing his gun to bear. "Hey," the blur said indignantly, bouncing up in to view again, "watch where you point that thing!"

"CJ?" Windcharger called.

"Here!"

The grey and red minibot ducked under enemy fire, making his way to Cliffjumper's side. Beachcomber was close behind. "Mech, we're in deep slag. I don't know how much longer some of those kids can—hey! What's with the bouncing white thing?"

"It's a rabbit." Beachcomber said, tilting his helm. "Hey, lil' fella."

"My name," the rabbit said firmly, "is Imbrium."

"I didn't know earth rabbits could talk." Windcharger said, his optics wide.

"I'm not really a rabbit."

"Maybe he's like Tranquility." Beachcomber suggested. He gently prodded at Imbrium, clearly fascinated despite the firefight going on around them.

"Yeah, yeah, look. We don't have time for this!" Imbrium jumped on to Cliffjumper's shoulder. "Okay. So you three have been chosen by the Powers That Be for a great and noble mission, yada yada yada."

"We already got a mission." Cliffjumper said, glaring at the tiny organic. He resisted the urge to flick him off his shoulder. "And that's blowing up the 'cons attacking the school. So unless your 'mission' includes that, I don't care if Primus Himself sent you."

"I'll be sure to pass that on to Him." Imbrium replied. "Lucky for you, your mission _does_ coincide with that. If you know Tranquility, then you know the gig she gave to your friends. This is pretty much the same deal."

"So why didn't she come to us?" Windcharger asked.

"Because," Imbrium huffed, "you guys are a bit different. She doesn't have the upgrades for you, I do." He jumped off of Cliffjumper's shoulder. "Now, are we gonna do this, or what?"

"Make it quick." Cliffjumper said, ducking and returning fire to an overzealous Astrotrain. "We're kinda in the middle of something."

"No shit?" Imbrium said sarcastically. "Brace yourselves." And then a brilliant light flared from a strange marking on his hindquarters. Before Cliffjumper could process that, the light had overtaken them and they started to change.

The transformation was much different than his normal transformation from root mode to vehicle or vice versa. For one thing, there was _light_. Cliffjumper was nearly blinded by it at first. His spark felt hot, like something inside it was burning to get out, and then rushed through wires and tubing to every part of his frame. It was like being remade. His frame was melting, twisting, _changing_ with an almost pain that was bordering on pleasure. As the light and heat fated, he flexed his new joints. He felt powerful. He felt strong. He…

…he was no longer a 'he'.

"What the _slag_?"

"Complain later!" Imbrium snapped. "Go kick ass now!"

Cliffjumper growled, her voice several tones higher than she was used to. "This had better be worth it." She snarled. "Where the frag is my gun?"

"Concentrate." Imbrium said. "Using that form is all about willpower."

"Like, feel the energy, CJ." Beachcomber said, shuttering her optics. "The Earth, it's within all of us." Powering up her optics once more, she crossed her arms out in front of her, palms towards the nearest decepticon. "Water Serpent!"

The three magical femmes watched as water burst out of the space in front of Beachcomber's hands in the form of a sinuous serpent, scales gleaming brightly in the late afternoon sunshine. It wrapped around Blitzwing and _squeezed_, bringing the triplechanger to his knees, before exploding in to a thousand tiny droplets. Blitzwing roared as the magically charged water shorted out his circuits, reducing him to a smoking wreck of a mech.

"Yeah, okay." Cliffjumper said in to the sudden silence. "Maybe it's worth it. What's mine?"

* * *

**A/N:** See? I do listen to people. You wanted Cliffjumper, I give you Cliffjumper. ...and a couple of others, too.

Also, see! I can _so_ pull from other magical girl series. Well. Maybe it isn't so evident quite yet. Just wait until the next chapter. For those of you who guess it, cookies for you! There's going to be one or two more parts to this 'episode'. After all, CJ and 'Charger still need to get their magic. *cackles*

Bonus points to anyone who gets where the title of this chapter comes from!

**EDIT:** I completely forgot: I caved and drew arts for this. FEAR MY PHOTOSHOP. Uh. I mean. Pretty Sailor Skywarp is currently starring at my (no longer empty!) Deviantart account. Either look up 'kaitekat' or remove the spaces from here: kaitekat. deviantart. com / art / Pretty-Soldier-Sailor-Skywarp-145649904 Go laugh at it or something. (And leave me comments! Even if it's only laughing at it!)


	18. Rain II

**Rain II  
**_Directly follows 'Rain'_

"_See if you can get the kids to safety while Blitzwing's down." _Windcharger zipped off towards the crowd of elementary students with Imbrium clinging to her shoulder, Cliffjumper's words echoing in her processor. What was she supposed to do? Even if she could transform in to car mode in this state (and according to Bumblebee, none of them could without losing the upgrade) she wouldn't be able to transportthe _entire school_ away from the battle.

"Any bright ideas?" She asked Imbrium, half-hopefully. There were an awful lot of children, and they were still a ways away. Why did a battlefield seem to make a normally small space so much _larger_?

"Use your upgrade!" Imbrium tightened his hold on the mini-bot. "Just focus on your spark. Can you feel the heat burning inside?"

"What do you know about inside my spark?" Windcharger retorted, but did as suggested. She _could_ feel something. Ducking behind a bright green slide that was miraculously still standing, she crouched down and tried to focus on the bright spot within. The warmth blossomed in to a fire, and Windcharger's optics flared as she _reached_ in to the power bubbling in her spark.

"_Winds of Defense!"_ The air around them thickened and shimmered in to ribbons of wind that sparkled green, coiling around them in thick ropes. Windcharger stood and motioned towards the pack of children, and the glittering wind raced towards them quicker than thought. It swirled around the surprised children and condensed in to a green dome-shaped shield that sparkled brightly in the sun.

Windcharger grinned eagerly and _reached_ again. Nothing else came up, and the dome started to shimmer. She could feel the threads of the shield starting to unravel, and the femme scrambled to gather them up again.

"Wait. That's _it_?" She demanded of the magical beast, pulling the winds tight once more. The dome solidified obligingly, and she cycled a sigh of relief.

"Seems that way."

"So I'm just supposed to stand here and hold up a force field?"

"Yup. You're wind, buddy. It's in the job description."

"I want a career change!" Windcharger huffed, before heading towards the children protected within her dome. Imbrium snickered at her and bounced off towards Cliffjumper.

* * *

The dome slid open obligingly to admit Windcharger inside, closing up neatly behind her. The strain of holding up the shield while simultaneously attempting to watch her own back eased up immensely. Windcharger rolled her shoulders back, rubbing at her neck cables. "Everyone all right in here?"

The children stared at her in silence. Tough crowd.

"It's okay," Windcharger said, "the bad guys can't get you in here."

"You got in here." A boy said from somewhere in the crowd.

"Well, yeah. But I'm one of the good guys."

More silence.

"Don't worry kids," Windcharger said finally, smiling tightly at the children, "me and the other two are magical warriors sent to protect you."

"Oh!" One of the younger girls clapped her hands, smiling brightly. "Like knights from the story today!"

"Yeah," the minibot replied, "sure." The crowd of kids shifted nervously, whispering amongst themselves.

"That's stupid." A boy scoffed loudly. "Who ever heard of knights wearing _miniskirts_?"

"Maybe _magic knights_ do." The girl retorted, flipping her red braid over her shoulder.

* * *

**A/N:** Are the references pointed enough? I might have been laying it on a tiny bit thick this time around. *innocent*

Also, constantly trying to remember that 'Charger is currently a femme is apparently beyond my abilities. I think I had to change every pronoun I wrote. -.-;;

Also, for those who read the last chapter within the first few hours of posting it and thus didn't see the edit: I caved and drew arts for this. FEAR MY PHOTOSHOP. Uh. I mean. Pretty Sailor Skywarp is currently starring at my (no longer empty!) Deviantart account. Either look up 'kaitekat' or remove the spaces from here: kaitekat. deviantart. com / art / Pretty-Soldier-Sailor-Skywarp-145649904 Go laugh at it or something. (And leave me comments! Even if it's only laughing at it! I have favorites and no comments, and it makes me a sad kitty :( )

**EDIT:** (Seriously, what is it with me forgetting things?) thepheonixqueen asked for a list of Upgraded bots last time around. So here we are, straight from my (edited) notes:

Magical Bot Team (cat familiar – Tranquility)

1. Prowl – (leader) - "Moon Shadow Sickle Revelation"  
2. Jazz – (scout, 2IC)  
3. Sunstreaker – (melee) - (light spell)  
4. Sideswipe (melee)  
5. Hound (scout) - (hologram spell)  
6. Bumblebee – (scout) - (sparkle spell)  
7. Inferno (melee)  
8. Wheeljack (inventor)  
9. Trailbreaker (scout) - (binding spell)  
10. Mirage (scout)  
11. Bluestreak (ranged)  
12. Ironhide (melee)  
13. SPOILER

Starlight!Minibots (rabbit familiar - Imbrium)

1. Cliffjumper – SPOILER  
2. Beachcomber – "Water Serpent"  
3. Windcharger – "Winds of Defense"

Magical!Seekers (? familiar - SPOILER)

1. Starscream – (pink/sparkly heart beam)  
2. Skywarp – SPOILER  
3. Thundercracker– "Star Sonic Wall"


	19. Lilac

**Lilac  
**_Precedes 'Thirteen'  
_

"I'm sorry, Prowl," First Aid said earnestly, pressing the glittering panel in to the tactician's hands, "but I just can't do this. I'm not your mech."

"What do you mean, 'Aid? Of course you are! You're one of us!" Bluestreak grabbed the panel from Prowl and pushed it back in to First Aid's hands. "I mean, sure, the cosmetic changes are kind of strange, and sometimes the sparkles get annoying, and you've got to be careful of certain 'bots upgrades or they tend to backfire in really spectacular ways—"

"Whoa, Blue, don't overload him with info." Jazz said. Bluestreak grinned sheepishly.

First Aid shook his helm. "I'm sorry," he repeated, "but there really must be some mistake. I'm a medic, not a warrior, and…"

"What's this about you stealing 'Aid? You can't have him. He's ours!"

"…and his brothers may have qualms with our claiming him." Prowl said dryly after Blades indignant shout.

"We're not _stealing_ him," Hound said, eyeing the bristling Blades and his escort of Streetwise and Groove, who, if not out-right antagonistic, were clearly defensive. "He'd still be a Protectobot. Nothing anyone can do will change that."

"Damn right." Blades grumbled. Streetwise nudged him, and Groove laid a soothing hand against First Aid's back. First Aid leaned in to the touch slightly before pulling away.

"I know." First Aid said quietly. "But even still, I can't join you. It doesn't change that I'm not a warrior, and you…well, you _are._ I wouldn't be any help to you at all."

"First Aid," Tranquility said gently, "have you tried using your upgrade yet?"

The medic looked down at the black cat. Even with her having the run of the base for several months now (and never very shy about voicing her opinion, either) it still seemed odd to hear her speak. Perhaps it was human prejudice rubbing off on him. "No, but…"

"But nothing. I think if you use it, you'll find you're not such a bad fit after all."

"I…" First Aid looked up at his brothers. Blades snorted, looking away, but Streetwise smiled encouragingly at him.

"Can't hurt to try, can it?"

"No matter what happens," Groove added, "you're still one of us."

First Aid nodded, and looked back down at Tranquility. "I'm not sure how."

She smiled a feline smile, and made a fantastic leap to his shoulder. "That's all right." She said, rubbing her cheek against his helm, "I'll teach you."

First Aid hesitantly put the panel back on his chest plate, allowing the transformation to wash over him.

"He looks like a flower." Sideswipe commented in a very audible whisper. "A…what do you call them?"

"A lilac." Sunstreaker grunted. "And no, he doesn't. Shut up, 'Sides." The lilac skirt and light green bows _did_ bring spring to mind, even if they were a little out of place against First Aid's red and white paint job.

"The upgrade is already inside you," Tranquility was saying, ignoring the twins with practiced ease, "you just need to bring it out."

"My spark feels…warm." First Aid said in surprise. His companion nodded.

"That's the feeling you want. Immerse yourself in it." First Aid's visor dimmed as he focused on the warmth. "You can feel it, can't you?" Tranquility coached. "Bubbling up inside you."

"Uh huh." First Aid murmured dreamily. His hands started to glow with a soft purple light.

"Speak the words and let it out. Don't be afraid."

"_Moon Healing Acceleration_." The soft light burst from his hands, spreading outwards until it touched every bot in the room. Metal sparkled with a purple sheen where the light touched, and armor that was dented and scuffed became new and whole. First Aid staggered back against the wave of exhaustion that swept over him. Streetwise and Groove were at his side instantly, supporting their dazed gestalt mate with careful hands and almost awe-struck optics.

"D-did I do that?" First Aid asked in to the silence, his voice trembling.

"You sure did, m' friend." Jazz said warmly, flexing his still sparkling arms in appreciation. "Haven't felt this good in vorns." He laughed, spinning quickly in an impromptu dance.

"We have plenty of warriors," Prowl told First Aid, "but we need someone who can heal, as well." He tilted his head to the side, a faint smile on his lip plates. "Won't you join us?"

"I…yes." First Aid raised his chin, his visor shining. "It would be my honor, sir."

* * *

**A/N: **Remember when I said there were _thirteen_ of the original magical!bots?

That's right. I used a gestalt member.

_Lilacs_ symbolize youthful innocence and confidence, both of which suit the Protectobots very well, I think. Although 'Aid could use a bit more confidence at times, poor thing. Field Lilacs (charity) would have suited First Aid better than Purple Lilacs (first love), but I wanted the purple for his upgrade.

Hot Spot is off doing leader-ish things. He'll find out later.

'Moon Healing Acceleration' is a blatant rip-off of 'Moon Healing Escalation' from _Sailormoon_. Although instead of purifying, it heals.

_Rain_ is still being worked on, since CJ still needs his magic, and I'm also working on a follow-up with the reactions of the rest of the Ark to the newest 'team'.


	20. Special: How the Seekers Saved Christmas

**SPECIAL: How the Seekers Saved Christmas  
**_Takes place quite awhile after 'Pink'_

"But…" the odd little green man was staring at the sailor-suited Seekers a little wild-eyed. "But, aren't you going to stop me? Don't you want to save Christmas?"

"Why would we want to save it? We don't even know what or who it _is._" Thundercracker replied.

"Christmas is the season of joy and caring." The man said, twisting his red hat in his hands. "It's when humans give each other presents and have great feasts and parties and are generally sappy and _loving_. It's disgusting!"

"And you want to destroy all that and take it away?"

"Well, yes."

"Right then. Have fun with that."

"But aren't you going to stop me?"

"Why should we?" Skywarp asked. "It's not like we care about the humans or anything. If you want to steal all their presents and make them all mopey, more power to you."

"But that's not how it's supposed to work!"

"You know," Thundercracker said to the wintry sky, "I'm getting really tired of that phrase."

"But…but it's not! You're supposed to be the _good_ guys. You're supposed to make speeches and attempt to sway me to your side, and generally just be a nuisance. You're supposed to—"

The two Seekers never did find out just what _else_ they were supposed to do, as at that moment, the little green man exploded in to a cloud of glitter and light, red and green sparkles mixed liberally with pink coating the ground where he had stood. Starscream, in all his pink-skirted glory, stood a few feet away.

"What do you know," he muttered to himself, giving his upgraded gun a suspicious look, "it actually worked_ properly_ for once."

"Hey 'Screamer!" Skywarp said cheerfully. "You just saved Christmas!"

Starscream stared at him, unimpressed. "I don't know what you two _think_ you're doing," he said testily, "but we have more important things to do than listen to some delusional creature ramble on about nothing."

"Not nothing," Skywarp said importantly, "he was rambling on about _Christmas_."

"Which will now continue on unimpeded, it seems," Thundercracker added, smirking, "since Starscream ended the threat to the humans."

"_That_ thing was a threat to the humans?" Starscream said. "My opinion of them just dropped several points. I didn't think that was possible."

"Apparently he was going to 'steal Christmas', or some nonsense." Thundercracker explained. "He seemed more interested going on about how we were supposed to stop him, though." He looked thoughtfully at the sparkly remnants on the ground for a moment. "Of course, technically we did, since you went and shot him."

"Will you stop nattering on about this 'Christmas'? It's getting annoying."

"The presents sound kinda fun, though. And the partying." Skywarp pointed out with a wide grin.

"You'll get a present from me soon enough if you don't cut it out. In the form of a null ray against your frame."

"Aw, 'Screamer," Skywarp said, dancing around him with widespread arms, "embrace the feelings of the Season!"

"I'll even give you a headstart. One."

And that was the year the Seekers saved Christmas. Nubium sighed, resettling her feathers. _Well, it's a start._ She mused to herself from her perch in a tree as she watched the Seekers bicker amongst themselves. _At least they didn't _join_ the little devil in his proposed rampage against humanity. Really, what else can a Guardian hope for with this lot?_

_Still, _she grumbled to herself as Starscream attempted to coat his loud-mouthed teammate with a new pink paintjob, _I bet Imbrium and Tranquility never have to put up with this sort of thing from _their_ groups._

_

* * *

_

**A/N:** Originally, this was going to be some sappy crack to do with the Autobots. Then Starscream started waving his sparkle-gun around. I decided it might be wise to let him have his way. Also, that would be the last mascot/guardian in this story. (Unless a new team reveals itself...NO, THAT WAS NOT A SUGGESTION, GUYS. *bats away the bunnies*) There will be more to do with Nubium later on. (I'm kind of surprised no one seems to have guessed where I'm pulling their names from. I guess I could just be that much of a geek.)

I swear I'll get back to Jazz and Prowl. Soon. (Since, you know, this is technically supposed to be about them...) Speaking of those two, _Playground Logic_ will not, unfortunately, be done for Christmas. Oops. I'm working on it, I swear!

Wow, not much in the way of reviews last chapter, but so many alerts and favorites! I'm glad you lot seem to be enjoying these :) Happy Christmas/Solstice/Kwanzaa/Hanukkah/etc everyone!


	21. Shiny

**Shiny  
**_Takes place long after Pink, in a future where the Magical!Seekers end up on the same side as the Magical!Bots._

"Frag it, 'Flight! What part of 'stay away from the Seekers' is so hard to understand?"

Fireflight glanced up from where he was not-molesting a bemused Thundercracker's wings. "But they're sparkly." He said simply.

"So are Jazz and the others!" Slingshot retorted. "And you're not climbing all over them!"

"Yeah," Fireflight said, smoothing his hand along a sleek blue wing, "but they don't have wings." Thundercracker gritted his denta against a moan, his optics at half-power. Fireflight hummed in response, tilting his helm to admire the play of light against the glittering blue paint as the Seeker shuddered under his ministrations.

Skywarp snickered from beside him, watching the proceedings with interest. "Yeah, hot stuff," he told Slingshot cheekily, not taking his optics off his wing mate and the little red jet, "so either come play with the big mechs or pipe down. TC's busy, but there's plenty of Skywarp to go around."

"_Who_ would want to play with _you_? You've probably got all kinds of viruses." Slingshot snarked. Skywarp just grinned at him.

"…we _are_ technically on the same side now…" Skydive mused suddenly. Air Raid grinned at him, and Slingshot whipped around to stare at them.

"What? Oh no. Not you, too—"

"JETPILE!" Skydive and Air Raid tackled Skywarp, bringing him down to the ground with a crash.

Slingshot cursed. "Hey! You glitches are…" he trailed off as the three began a very convoluted game of grope and tickle. His expression grew torn, optics flicking between the two groups.

"Don't be jealous." Skywarp said from beneath Air Raid. "I'm sure TC and the runt would be happy to share." Slingshot growled and threw caution to the wind.

Fireflight giggled as Slingshot shoved in beside him, his own hands sliding up over Thundercracker's vents. "I'm only doing this for tactical knowledge." Slingshot informed Thundercracker and the area at large. "You know, for when you and the other Seekers show your true colors and try to shoot us all in the aft. So I know your weak points."

"Just keep telling yourself that, kid." Thundercracker grunted.

* * *

::Prowl to Silverbolt.::

::Silverbolt here::

::You might be interested to know that your team is currently molesting two-thirds of the Seekers.::

Silverbolt cursed over the comm. ::I'll be right there.::

::Negative.:: Prowl told him blandly. ::Jazz has informed me your presence is not necessary.::

::Not…necessary, sir?::

::Indeed.:: Prowl shot the snickering Jazz an even look. ::He claims it might 'interfere'.::

::…I'll be right there, _sir_.::

::Acknowledged.:: Prowl replied, and Jazz broke out in full out guffaws, leaning heavily against the tactician.

"It's a wonder any of your troops can take you seriously." Starscream said dryly.

"I have never had an issue with respect from any of the bots under my command." Prowl said serenely. Jazz was now draped around his hip plates, his laughter drained in to helpless giggles.

"And Jazz?"

"Jazz is Jazz." Prowl said by way of explanation.

"Sadly, that makes perfect sense."

* * *

"See?" Later that night, Tranquility was perched on a now-calm Jazz's shoulder in the rec room. She wore a smug cat-grin. "Inter-faction romance! It's _traditional_!"

"Does it count if the romance came after the alliance?" Sideswipe asked.

"And if it's less 'romance' and more getting each other off?" Sunstreaker added.

"Yes." Tranquility said flatly. "Yes it does."

"Just checking."

"So, what happened after?"

"They finally decided it would be prudent to move to a more private location." Prowl said from across Jazz. He regarded the chess board set between them and calmly captured one of Jazz's pawns. Jazz retaliated by capturing his queen.

"Are they still at it?" Wheeljack asked.

"Yes," Silverbolt said wearily, "they are."

"Wow." Bluestreak said in to the sudden silence. "That's some stamina."

Starscream made a disparaging sound. "Autobots." He said dismissively. "You lot don't know the _meaning_ of the word 'stamina'."

Sideswipe grinned, his expression sharp. "That sounded like a challenge." He said silkily.

"It wasn't." Starscream replied flatly. "Just the truth."

"C'mon, Sunny." Sideswipe said cheerfully. "Let's show 'Screamer how we roll."

"It's Sunstreaker." The aforementioned mech said flatly, but he still gave Starscream a once-over, his helm tilted consideringly.

"Prowl, control your mechs!"

"Sideswipe," Prowl said from his seat, not taking his optics off his chess game, "please don't tear the Ark apart in your off-duty activities."

"Yes, sir!"

"That wasn't what I meant and you know it, Prowl!"

"Well," Prowl said, "I can't very well tell the Autobots what they can or can not do on their own time. It's not good for morale. That's not," he paused, tilting his helm to the side as he considered his next move, "'how we roll'."

"So instead you allow rampant hedonism and random propositioning of innocent mechs, so long as it's not during work hours?" Starscream asked incredulously.

"Rampant hedonism during work hours interferes with the running of the army, which makes more work for Prowl." Bluestreak said cheerfully. "Making more work for Prowl makes Jazz upset, which means Jazz has to…." He paused and considered the phrase "…'smack a bitch', I think Spike said it was. And that makes _everyone_ unhappy."

"If you didn't want to be propositioned," Prowl said placidly, "you shouldn't have made the challenge." He moved his rook forward. "Checkmate."

"Anyone else coming?" Sideswipe asked the room as he and his brother moved to flank the sputtering Seeker.

* * *

"Oh no," Bluestreak said cheerfully the next morning, "Starscream was willing enough. I think he just likes to complain. A lot. Sideswipe made it in to a game to see who could get him to stop complaining the longest."

"Who won?" Jazz asked. He spun idly on his chair in front of the comm. console, tapping his fingers against the armrests in time to a beat only he could hear.

"Blue did." Hound said, amused. "Did you know that Seekers are really sensitive right underneath their wing joints?"

Jazz grinned. "Like door wings?"

"Just like door wings." Bluestreak replied, his optics flashing brightly.

* * *

**A/N:** This was _supposed _to stop right after Tranquility was Miss Smug, but then Sideswipe stood up and demanded action. *headdesk*

Starscream and the 'bots won't tell me just how many were involved in their own little display of 'rampant hedonism', but 'Screamer's pretty smug.


	22. Troubadour

**Troubadour**  
OR _"What Can I Do For You?"  
Takes place long after 'Rain'  
_

"Can't I just shoot it?"

"Did it work any of the _other_ six times you've already tried it?" Imbrium said, giving the leather-skirted femme a Look.

"Seventh time's the charm!" Cliffjumper replied a little desperately. Sadly, the seventh shot did as much damage as the first six. Which is to say, none at all.

"CJ, c'mon now. Have I ever led you wrong?" Imbrium said, giving his charge his best cute rabbit expression.

"Would you like that alphabetically or chronologically?" Cliffjumper cursed as she dodged out of the way of a blast of something cold and dark. The thing he was fighting was like nothing he had come across before. According to Imbrium, it wasn't native to Earth. Eight feet tall, it resembled nothing more than a shrouded bi-pedal figure with glowing red eyes fit for a Decepticon. It was also capable of intangibility, and none of Cliffjumper's regular attacks – magical or otherwise – seemed to affect it at all.

"CJ!" Imbrium insisted.

"All right, all right!" Cliffjumper snarled, and pulled out a sparkling red stick from subspace. "For the record," she said as the light began to envelop her, "I really, _really_ hate this power-up."

"Noted!" Imbrium said, leaping clear of a blast of darkness.

The light twisted around Cliffjumper's frame, tugging on her skirt and ruffling through the soft red feathers on her chest plate. Her leathers morphed in to something red and shimmery, layer upon layer of seemingly delicate material cascading down from her hip plates into ruffles halfway down her thighs. The stick stretched in to a deep red microphone, the handle lengthening in to a rod about half her size. She twirled it around over her head and struck a pose, power coursing through her frame. "All right!" Cliffjumper flashed the monster a bright smile and _shimmied_. "Let's get this party started!"

The shadow monster hissed at her, striking forward with a burst of cold. Cliffjumper merely laughed, her voice high and bright. And then she began to sing.

"_It's just a jump to the left, and then a step to the right,"_ Cliffjumper jumped and sidestepped, twirling her microphone as she went. A long stream of sparkling light looped out and around, shimmering in the night air._ "With your hands on your hips, you bring your knees in tight," _the rope of light spun around the shrouded figure, trapping it within. It howled, the sound low and mournful, but Cliffjumper just smiled, and jerked the microphone towards her with a thrust of her hips. "_But it's the pelvic thrust that really drives you insaaaaaaane,"_ the shadow dissolved in to flecks of darkness within the shimmering light, and dissipated harmlessly in to the night air. Cliffjumper struck a pose, on hand on her hip and the other holding her mic up to her mouth. _"Let's do the Time Warp again!"_

"My kingdom for a camera." Imbrium said with a sigh. "And the opposable thumbs to operate it."

"I think Cliffjumper might prefer as little evidence as possible."

Imbrium twisted around, his eyes wide. "Prowl!" He exclaimed. "When'd you get here?"

"A few moments ago." The sailor-suited black and white mech regarded the dancing Cliffjumper with a bland expression. "I was about to offer my assistance, but I see it's hardly necessary."

"Prowl!" Cliffjumper said cheerfully (cheerfully! a corner of Prowl's mind said, stunned, and Prowl agreed) and leapt towards her superior, grabbing his hands in hers. "Prowl, dance with me!"

"I'd rather not." Prowl said stiffly. "Perhaps you'd like to transform back?"

"Oh, no." Cliffjumper replied, smiling, and twirled them around. "It's too nice of a night to _not_ dance. Come on, don't be such a stiff!"

"Cliffjumper." Prowl said, his voice deepening to his 'I am your commanding officer and you _will_ do as I say' tone. "Transform back to root mode. That's an order."

The red femme pouted, but dropped his hands and spun away. With one final shimmy, she tossed her microphone up in the air. Light surrounded her again, and the upgrade melted away. When the light faded, Cliffjumper was a mech again, back to his normal frame, with only a sparkly red stick as evidence of the gaudy upgrade.

"I really _hate_ that form." He cursed, subspacing the stick.

"Back to normal, then?" Prowl asked. Cliffjumper looked away.

"Yeah." He said shortly. "Thanks."

"That upgrade changes your personality."

"It's the nature of the transformation." Imbrium said, leaping up on to Cliffjumper's shoulder. "It doesn't do any harm; not really. But in order to produce the energy required, well…"

"It makes me giddy." Cliffjumper said bluntly. "It's almost like there's someone else taking over my processor. I know what's going on around me, but it's like I'm distanced. Everything is just bright and shiny and I get the urge to sing and dance with everyone."

"Are you capable of discerning friend from foe?" Prowl asked sharply.

"Yeah, that's easy." Cliffjumper shrugged. "You and Imbrium, you glow. That shadow thing was dark, so it made me want to make it bright too. That's what my 'attack' does."

"Hm."

"Prowl?" Cliffjumper gave him a sidelong look. "You're not going to…I mean…we don't _really_ need to tell everyone about this, right?"

"Actually," Prowl said, "I was going to request for you two to keep silent about this for the time being."

Cliffjumper and Imbrium stared at him, stunned.

"As soon as Jazz discovers your new ability," Prowl began, "he'll start pestering Tranquility and Imbrium both in to giving him the same ability, whether it's in their power or not. And he'll find a way to get it." He looked to the ceiling, a long-suffering expression on his face plates. Imbrium shuddered. "He always does. And I have no desire to see Jazz under the effects of the personality alteration your upgrade causes."

Cliffjumper's optics widened. "He'd be like a helio-hamster hyped up on rust sticks."

"So I'd like you to keep this ability of yours to yourself for as long as you can." Prowl told him seriously. "Please. For all of our sakes."

"You don't have to worry on _my_ account." Cliffjumper said fervently. "My vocalizer's silent on the subject."

"My lips are sealed." Imbrium added.

"Good mechs." Prowl paused. "Er. Mech and rabbit."

* * *

**A/N: **A troubadour, according to TheFreeDictionary(dot)com, was _'One of a class of 12th-century and 13th-century lyric poets in Southern France, northern Italy, and northern Spain, who composed songs in langue d'oc often about courtly love.'_

Any of you who may have played (or heard of) Final Fantasy X-2 should remember the Songstress dressphere. CJ's upgrade is based loosely on this. The inspiration comes from bbpuyo(dot)deviantart(dot)com / art / Cliff-in-drag-145550574, link graciously provided by **MarySuofYay**, who enjoys flinging bunnies at me (and likely snickering gleefully once they won't let go). There, see? I finally wrote it. All for you :P

_'The Time Warp' _is from _'The Rocky Horror Picture Show'_ and is seriously awesome and cracky all on it's own. 'Helio-hamsters' are apparently an actual animal in Transformers canon. I have no idea if they would get hyped up on anything, but mine do. 'Rust Sticks' are a type of treat I've seen in a number of places now, and I'm pretty sure they're a fanon concept only. I have no idea who to credit for them :( I'm equating them to pixie sticks, however. (You know, those little straws of PURE SUGAR that you beg your parents for, and then get ridiculously hyper on? ...well, I did, at least. Pixie sticks were only allowed at my house when it was sunny outside and my parents could kick me out once I started in on one.)

Cliffjumper would like it to be known that he does not approve of this chapter. At all. *shoves him in a closet*


	23. Allegiance

**Allegiance  
**_Follows "Black Cat"_

When Tranquility first came to the base, she insisted on keeping a low profile around the other bots. "It's important." She stressed. "To everyone else, I'm just a normal cat."

"To everyone else you're a normal cat." Prowl agreed. "Except Prime. He will ultimately decide whether or not you can stay in the Ark."

"Shouldn't be a problem." Jazz said cheerfully. "You'll see."

Tranquility shook her head. "He's not one of us!"

"He's our commanding officer." Prowl replied calmly. "So he will know everything."

"I don't think you quite grasp the meaning of secrecy." Tranquility said acerbically.

"And I don't quite think you grasp the concept that our allegiance belongs, first and foremost, to the Autobots." Prowl glanced down at her, raising an optic ridge. "It really isn't a hard concept to grasp." He added.

"Don't get us wrong," Jazz said, "we wanna protect the Earth and all, but Optimus is Prime. We can't really hide somethin' this big from him."

"You're going to have to." Tranquility spat. "I'm not going to talk to him, and you're not going to either. You can't. You're Guardians now. That's the most important thing."

"Well," Prowl said, "I suppose that's that." Tranquility smiled, pleased, until a round glittering gray panel dropped to the floor in front of her. A blue panel quickly joined it, shimmering gently in the moonlight.

"Told you." Jazz said, still smiling. "We're Autobots. If you can't accept that, then we can't accept these." He shook his helm. "'S too bad. I kinda liked the skirt." He sounded almost wistful.

Prowl nodded to the stunned feline. "It was a pleasure meeting you, Tranquility." He said. "Good luck in your future endeavors." They turned to go.

"Wait!"

They turned back, and she nudged the gray panel towards Prowl. "I'll talk to him." She said. Her mouth was twisted to one side and her eyes were flat, tail swishing madly behind her. "But _just_ him."

Prowl bent and took back his panel, handing Jazz his own. "Just him." He agreed gravely. He transformed and opened his front door for Tranquility, who made a dignified leap on to his front seat. Jazz transformed beside him, and they peeled off across the asphalt under a star filled sky, the crescent moon hanging low on the horizon.

"Slag," Jazz laughed as they headed towards the Ark, "but the bots are gonna _flip_ when they find out you've adopted a cat, Prowl."

"I think it would be more believable if we claimed _you_ have adopted Tranquility, Jazz."

"No way, mech. She's all yours. You both are two of a kind."

"Do I get any say in this at all?" Tranquility demanded.

"Not really." The grin in Jazz's voice was almost visible. "You're just a cat, remember?"

"You don't really know _anything_ about cats, do you."

* * *

**A/N: **Honestly, when I started writing this, I was planning on doing something with _Bluestreak_. Oh well. Also, for anyone confused with the way this thing keeps jumping around, there's a timeline over on my writing journal. You can find the link on my profile, if you're curious.

I'm currently in the process of writing an Epically Tragic Backstory for one of the characters, since all Magical!Girl series need at least one character with a Tragic Past. It may or may not be posted in this story file, depending on the length. (It's shaping up to be considerably longer than the drabble-ish chapters thus far.) Thus far, it includes Horrible Accidents, Drastic Career Changes, and Puppy Optics. Hopefully fandom won't kill me too badly when I finally get it out.

**Love Psycho**is currently issuing a challenge for anyone interested in the concept of Magical Girls and Transformers. Head over to her profile to check it out! And if you participate, drop me a line. I'd love to see the kind of crack it's sure to bring about!

Speaking of crack (and I'm almost done, I swear!) I posted up a new sketch on my Deviantart account, if anyone's interested. You know all that human!Transformers fanart floating around? ...yeah, I went there. Prowl's 13, all as Magical Girls. The link, as always, is in my profile.


	24. Rain III

**Rain III**  
_Directly follows Rain II_

"Okay," said Cliffjumper, "so how do you use this thing?"

Imbrium cocked his head to the side at the newly-minted femme. "It's as easy as breathing." He assured her confidently. Then he paused. "Or, well, whatever you lot do. Processing, or something."

"Can we get on with it?" Cliffjumper demanded tersely. She dodged out of the way of an incoming burst of laser fire.

"Hey there, pretty femme." Astrotrain crooned from across the field. "I don't know where you came from, but I know where you're going!" He cackled, and shot a few more times in Cliffjumper's direction. "Straight to the Pit, when I'm done with you!"

Imbrium looked at Cliffjumper. "Not the sharpest knife in the rack, is he?"

"Not the quickest processor, either." She replied. "Explosions? Sometime this decavorn would be _great_."

The little rabbit-thing snickered. "Okay," he said, "you need to focus on your spark."

"My spark?" Cliffjumper looked down at her modified chest plate. She put a servo over the the red feathers that fanned out just above her spark casing and tried to focus on it. "It's not working!" She insisted, frustrated.

"Willpower, CJ! It's not rocket scientist, just focus on the heat in your spark and—oh shit, there's a kid out here and that lug head is headed straight for him!"

Cliffjumper whipped around. She couldn't see the kid, but she _could_ see Astrotrain. Beachcomber and Windcharger were nowhere in sight. She didn't even think, and the power came bubbling up from somewhere deep within, a fire raging hotter than any star. "Fire Cannon!" She snarled, one finger pointed towards the advancing triplechanger. The concussive force of the blast was enormous, blasting Cliffjumper herself back a couple dozen meters. But as she pulled herself out of a minibot shaped crater in the ground, she saw that Astrotrain had definitely got the raw end of the blast. His frame was blackened with soot and worse, smoking heavily in the late afternoon sunshine. Cliffjumper nodded, satisfied, and then looked around. "Where's the kid?" She asked, dread washing over her frame. If she'd hit it...

Imbrium gave her a guileless look. "Kid?" He asked innocently. "What kid?"

"You said there was a kid out he—you lied to me!"

Imbrium snickered. "'Lied' is such an ugly world." He said. "Call it creative motivation."

Cliffjumper grumbled at him, but left it alone. "Guess it's clean up duties now...hey!" In the absence of her attention, Blitzwing and regained his bearings and somehow dragged himself over to Astrotrain. Heaving him up with a grunt, the two somehow managed to take off in to the air, wobbling heavily as they made a shaky retreat.

"Let 'em go, CJ." Beachcomber said, coming up behind her. "We've done enough damage today." Cliffjumper snorted and struggled to her feet.

"Yeah, you better run, you cowards!" Cliffjumper called after them, shaking a servo at them. "Try something like that again, and we'll wipe the floor with you!"

"_Cliffjumper?"_

Cliffjumper spun around, only to be greeted by the surprised face plates of Hot Spot, with the other Protectobots fanned out behind him in formation. She stalled at their stunned expressions, but quickly regained her bluster. Folding her arms over her slim chassis, the leather-skirted femme gave them her best disapproving glare. "You're late!"

"You're a femme!" Streetwise blurted.

"I hadn't noticed." Cliffjumper bit out.

* * *

**A/N:** Finally made it back to this storyline. There is one final part to this, and then we're done with the origins of the Starlight!Minibots.


	25. Rain IV

**Rain IV  
**_Directly follows 'Rain III'_

"Sideswipe, I swear to Primus, if you try to grab my aft again _I will end you."_

"Sideswipe, stop baiting Cliffjumper."

"But Proooowl…"

Imbrium jumped down from Beachcomber's shoulder and landed next to Tranquility. "Lookin' sharp there, kitty cat."

"Imbrium." Tranquility sighed.

"_Tranquillitatis._"He mocked, white ears twitching.

"It's _Tranquility_." The black cat hissed. Imbrium smirked back at her.

"Now, _Tranquillitatis_," the rabbit said in a saccharine voice, "don't tell me you're embarrassed about your name!"

"You will stop that inane chatter _right now_ if you don't want five claws up your furry white—"

"That will be enough, you two." Prowl said sharply. Tranquility turned her head away with an audible sniff.

"Tranquillitatis and Imbrium?" Spike said. "Weird names."

"Yeah? What's yours?" Imbrium asked.

"Spike."

Imbrium snorted. "You're one to talk."

"They're Latin." Jazz said. "English, and most o' the modern European languages, came about from that language. Not much use these days 'cept for science and religious stuff."

"They're also the names of craters on our Moon." Chip said. He brought up a map of the near side of the Moon on Teletraan-1. "See, look. _Mare Tranquillitatis_ or the Sea of Tranquility. It's also the site of the Apollo 11 landing. _Mare Imbrium_, or the Sea of Rains, is up here in the north-west, and was the site of the Apollo 15 landing."

"Both are prominent in your history of space exploration." Optimus noted.

"Both are great big shiny targets that attract attention." Imbrium said, jumping up on to the console. "Lots of magical energy coming from them. 'Course, the humans can't actually sense the magic on a conscious level, but give them a map with a bunch of locations to choose from, and they're more likely to choose the ones with magic. Magical nexuses like those tend to draw attention, no matter what."

"Magical Nexuses?" Perceptor asked sharply, his optics lighting up with interest.

"Points where the ley lines merge." Tranquility explained. "Magic flows through the Universe much like rivers do on Earth. Nexus points are where the rivers cross, and magic tends to pool in these areas before moving on. This creates a vast amount of Power that one can tap in to with the right knowledge."

"Fascinating." Perceptor said. "The ramifications for the scientific community could be astronomical with this new knowledge. Tell me, have any scientific personages studied this phenomenon? What is the energy output of these 'magical nexuses'? Is it possible to draw energies from the 'ley lines' as well?"

Tranquility blinked, and then shook her head. "I'm sorry," she said, "I was never the scientist of our group."

Perceptor looked disappointed, but brightened again. "There are more of you?"

The cat paused. "Once." She said finally. The rest of the room was silent at that quiet pronouncement.

"So," Optimus rumbled finally, "what's the connection with the Lunar Maria?"

"We were born from there." Tranquility said. "The magical energies in the _maria_ gave us form, and we took our names from our birthplaces."

Bluestreak canted his helm at Imbrium. "So…if Tranquillitatis – sorry Tranquility – goes by her English name, does this mean we should be calling you 'Rain'?"

"Just because Quill there likes to go by her boring translation, doesn't mean I do. Imbrium suits me just fine."

"It's _Tranquility_, you moron, and my name is hardly boring."

* * *

**A/N:** Aaaand that's it for the Rain Quartet! For those of you who guessed that they were named for the lunar maria, kudos to you! (Maria, to those confused, is the plural of Mare. Mare/Maria is Latin for Sea/Seas) Nubium is also named for a mare -- Mare Nubium, or 'Sea of Clouds'. There were no landings on Nubium, but I liked the name for the Seekers. I almost went with 'Procellarum' (storms), but that was a bit of a mouthful. (Although, I suppose I could have shortened it to 'Cella'...)

Please excuse the random magical theory-crafting, I'm a bit of a fantasy nerd XD; I considered going with 'nodes' instead of 'nexuses' (wiki claims both 'nexus' and nexuses' are the plural form, so I went with the latter for easier understanding) but in the end decided to continue with the Latin theme. Nexus is Latin for 'connection' or 'the center of something'.

Inspirations for the Starlight!Minibots! Obviously, the Starlights from Sailormoon -- their outfits are quite liberally ripped off, because I have no shame. Their abilities, however, are from Magic Knight Rayearth -- one of Clamp's earlier works, and a fantastic series. Imbrium the rabbit-thing is inspired from that series as well - although he's a great deal snarkier than Mokona. He's more rabbitier in appearance than Mokona is, too. Not so much a giant pork bun. (Fans of Tsubasa: Reservoir Chronicle will likely recognize him from that, as well, as Clamp brought him back for that series. But then, Clamp brought _everything_ back for that series.)

Cliffjumper and co will not be getting Mashin, as they don't really need them, being giant robots themselves.


	26. Honey

**Honey  
**_Follows 'Allegiance'_

"You're one of us," the little cat insisted, her green eyes wide and bottomless. Bumblebee shook his helm of the fog that seemed to be taking over his processor. He had to be imagining this. Prowl would have mentioned the fact that the cat he had adopted was capable of human speech. And that she was apparently his advisor for a team within the Autobots that utilized…magic? Granted by the light of the crescent moon? (What about other phases of the moon? It wasn't even a crescent moon tonight; the phase was just shy of a full moon, the great white globe hanging in the air like a child's attempt at a circle that came close but was still slightly off.) It was all too strange. The cat huffed in exasperation, and then did an impossible back flip, landing nimbly on all four paws. A large round panel clattered to the ground after her; gold and sparkling and embossed with a silver crescent moon. It was strangely compelling. "I'll prove it to you." She said somewhat grimly, and nosed the panel towards him. Bumblebee stared at the panel, and then looked at her again, not trusting himself to speak. "Well, come on then," she said impatiently. "Pick it up."

He bent and scooped up the panel, giving her an uncertain look. "What am I supposed to do with it?"

"Attach it just over your spark chamber. Quickly now!" She frowned at his skeptical look. "Don't argue, just do it!"

Uncertain as to just why he was obeying the odd cat, even if she _was_ Prowl's, Bumblebee did as he was told. The panel clicked in to place with a strange sense of familiarity that surprised him, and then the heat rushed over him.

It was as if everything he had ever done over his lifetime led up to that moment. He felt as if he had been missing a piece of himself his entire life without knowing it and only now was whole. Suddenly everything came together and his spark was singing with the pure and absolute rightness of it all. And even when the heat faded, that feeling of completeness didn't fade.

He onlined optics he hadn't realized he'd offlined in the first place, and looked down at the cat. And that's when he noticed the black bow and the gold skirt. "This is new." He observed mildly.

"Come on," Tranquility said a trifle smugly. "Time to go 'kick some 'con aft', as Jazz would say."

Bumblebee grinned at her. "Now you're talking my language!"

The sight of Jazz and Prowl similarly be-skirted didn't surprise Bumblebee all that much by this point, but his own entrance certainly surprised everyone else. Words rose unbidden to his mind, and Bumblebee smiled in to the stunned silence, his expression bright and cheerful and utterly without malice. "Moon Honey Spark Burst!"

Starscream, coated in what appeared to be a veneer of gold sparkles, crashed in to a nearby tree as his vision was compromised. Thundercracker and Skywarp wobbled in the air, and Prowl quickly fired off a couple of quick purple blasts from his scythe. As they fell ingloriously from the sky, Jazz grinned at the newest recruit.

"Nice duds." He said cheerfully. Bumblebee grinned back.

"Yours aren't too shabby either."

Prowl shuttered his optics once before turning towards the downed Seekers. At least _they_ were still somewhat normal.

* * *

**A/N:** This chapter is for Lucretzia, is requested way back in Chapter 14 'the discovery of Bumblebee's transformation~'. I don't know if you're still reading, but if you are, this is for you :)

(See! I can do requests! They just. Take awhile sometimes. *shifty eyes*)

If anyone's interested (and bored), I have a poll going on above my profile right now. Since so many people have mentioned a Tuxedo Mask-like character, I was curious as what would be the most popular. Fill it out if you're so inclined :)


	27. Hug

**Hug**

"It's unnatural." Red Alert groused with his arms crossed stiffly over his chest plates. Inferno bit back a wry smile.

"Might be," he agreed easily. "But if it helps us win the war, it can't be all that bad, right?"

Red Alert eyed the additions to Inferno's plating with obvious distaste. "I reserve the right to defer judgment." He announced, and Inferno laughed outright.

"Y' still haven't answered me yet." Inferno said mischievously.

Red Alert paused, obviously torn. Then, all in a rush: "I want _you_. Not this weird sparkly nonsense that hides your frame."

Inferno chuckled and let the magic dissolve his upgrade. "Sure, Red," he said, a smile playing on his lip plates. "Anythin' you say." He spread his arms wide. "Do I get that hug now?"

"You're insufferable." Red Alert retorted, heaving a put-upon sigh. That didn't stop him from moving in to the circle of Inferno's arms.

"Might be," Inferno agreed, still smiling as he pulled Red Alert close. The smaller mech's helm rested against Inferno's spark chamber, bright blue optics offlining. "Y' still love me, though."

"Hm." Red Alert's tone was noncommittal, but Inferno heard the agreement in it. They were silent for a few klicks before Red Alert spoke up, his voice once again testy. "Those sparkles better be _gone_, Inferno. I won't have them all through my quarters. Who knows what they'll do to the security feeds."

"You're the one who had to have an uplink in his quarters."

"_Someone_ needs to keep on top of things while everything else goes merrily to the Pit. Primus knows the lot of you needs watching."

"Whatever you say, Red."


	28. Enabler

**Enabler  
**_Directly follows 'Shiny'_

"The Aerialbots have all but adopted Thundercracker and Skywarp, and it appears as though they'll soon add Starscream, as well. Jazz informs me that Fireflight has been seen 'making optics' at him." Prowl reported, his optics on his datapad. The Prime's office was quiet but for the sound of his voice, the only other inhabitant's attention riveted solely on the doorwinged mech. "It is probable that this has something to do with his display with roughly one sixth of the current inhabitants of the Ark last night. The noise levels from the Twins' quarters grew quite loud, but as no one has put forth a complaint, no action was taken against them."

"No complaints? Really?" Optimus asked in a nearly perfect sober tone. Prowl still caught the slight hint of amusement lingering in his words and gave him a steady gaze.

"No," Prowl said calmly, "None at all."

"I'd wondered why Gears and Huffer were in the Med Bay."

"They indulged in a little too much high-grade last night." Prowl said neutrally. "As I understand it, Bumblebee and Windcharger had a time detaching them from the ceiling of the Rec Room."

"I wonder how they got up there." Optimus mused aloud.

Prowl gave him an even look. "I'm sure I have no idea, sir." After all, it was hardly the business of the officers what the crew got up to in their free time, so long as no one was injured or incapacitated. Generally this was fairly easy to achieve; no bot wanted to get on Ratchet's bad side.

The fact that the two mini-bots had accepted the doctored high-grade was their own fault. Even if it _had_ come from Bluestreak, which of course Prowl knew nothing about. Officially.

"The general atmosphere towards the Seekers has lightened considerably," Prowl continued, and Optimus returned his attention to the matter at hand. "There is still a sixty-seven percent chance that this trend will fade and sentiments will return to previous levels, but should the current conditions persist, this will drop as time goes by."

"As Jazz predicted." Optimus said shrewdly, his fingers steepled before his faceplate. Prowl inclined his helm in agreement.

"Jazz is confident that with enough repeated positive interactions the hostilities between Starscream's trine and the Autobots will subside." Prowl said. "I must admit I had my doubts, but thus far his assessment has been unfailingly correct."

"So the integration is going well, then?" Optimus asked.

"It appears to be." Prowl replied. "There is still a good deal of animosity at times, but last night's…activities…seem to have bridged some of the gap."

"It's nice to see our groups intermingling." Optimus said benignly. Prowl tilted his helm to the side, considering.

"And I suppose the fact that you had sent the Aerialbots out on maneuvers over the precise location in which the Seekers happened to be relaxing just before recalling Silverbolt alone for a briefing was a complete coincidence, sir."

"Of course." Optimus said, regarding Prowl with injured innocence. "You wouldn't imply otherwise, would you?"

"Of course not, sir." Prowl said blandly. "The idea is completely illogical."

* * *

**A/N:** Because (at least in my head) Prime has always been the biggest enabler _ever_. (And apparently Jazz is corrupting Prowl. o.O)


	29. Crossover: Introductions

**Crossover: Introductions  
**_This doesn't really fit in to the actual Magical!Bot timeline. (An AU of my AU? Have I really sunk that low?)_

The city was quiet; abandoned cars littering the streets from frantic civilians long since evacuated the area the Sailor Suited Seekers had been terrorizing. It seemed that all human presence was gone – but for five mini-skirted figures silhouetted against the skyline.

"I'll tame your heart with the whip of love! The soldier of love and beauty, I am Sailor Venus!"

"I'll cool your head with ice and snow! The soldier of water and intelligence, I am Sailor Mercury!"

"I'll make you repent with holy flame! The soldier of fire and passion, I am Sailor Mars!"

"I'll force your hand with lightning strength! The soldier of thunder and courage, I am Sailor Jupiter!"

"How dare you terrorize these innocent people in the guise of a Sailor Soldier! In the name of the Moon, I will not forgive you! The pretty suited soldier of love and justice, I am Sailor Moon!"

"_Together, we will right wrongs and triumph over evil. We are the Sailor Team!"_

"And that," Tranquility said with finality from the sidelines, "is how you do it." She stared her gaping team down with hard green eyes.

"That's how you get yerself slagged, y'mean." Ironhide retorted. "Ain't you ever heard of 'shoot first, ask questions later'?"

"That's what _you_ do, Ironhide." Bumblebee pointed out.

"Yeah, an' it works every time!"

"While this is all very interesting, don't you think it might be time to engage the enemy?" Prowl demanded.

"Oh no, Prowl," Starscream purred, "take all the time you need. This is quite enjoyable." He smiled, sharp and quick. "I am eager to hear _your_ little introduction."

"Moon Rhapsody Resonation!" A blast of sound and light slammed in to Starscream, and he toppled from the sky with a shrill yelp. "I think mine wins!" Jazz said cheerfully, his arms still outstretched.

"But you didn't even introduce yourself!" Sailor Moon pouted, her hands on her hips. "You _have_ to introduce yourself. Otherwise the enemy won't know who you are!"

"It's a little rude," Mercury agreed.

"Yeah," Skywarp called mockingly from the sky, "and you don't want to be _rude_." Mercury flushed in embarrassment and then glared hard at the Seeker. But someone else beat her to the punch.

"My name is Sailor Sideswipe. You killed my creator. Prepare to die!" With manic glee, Sideswipe blasted a sailor-suited Thundercracker out of the air with a well-timed blast of glitter as a startled Skywarp teleported away.

"No fair, that's cheatin'." Jazz said. "You stole that!"

"All's fair in love and war!" Sideswipe crowed.

"Can we trade teams?" Tranquility asked Luna and Artemis somewhat desperately. "_Please._"

"Hey," Luna retorted, unimpressed, "at least you don't have to deal with teenage hormones."

"You know," Venus said thoughtfully to Jupiter, "Sunstreaker's kind of cute. In a metal-ly kind of way."

"I don't know…" Jupiter mused. "But Skywarp kind of reminds me of my old boyfriend." She smiled dreamily.

"Your old boyfriend looked like a purple and black jet in a skirt?"

"Well…he was really tall. And he had really nice black hair. With purple highlights. And…"

"What about the skirt?"

"Everyone has hobbies."

"Can we _please_ stop fantasizing about the robots?" Mars demanded. "I thought we were supposed to fighting here."

"Don't act so high and mighty, Mars." Sailor Moon said hotly. "I _saw_ you looking at Mirage."

"I was _not_!"

"Are they always like this?" Bumblebee asked Mercury curiously.

"Always." The blue suited soldier replied with a resigned sigh.

* * *

**A/N:** **Eerian_sadow** of LJ requested _Magical!Bots meets actual Sailor Moon_ from my drabble request post awhile back and I really couldn't resist. As for how they got there...that's a whole other story ;) I tend to like the manga!characterizations better, but anime!verse is just so darned cracky, I couldn't resist. Also, the 'titles' that the Inners give themselves (soldier of...) are pilfered gleefully from the live action series, which is also some awesome crack. (Also it has Dark!Mercury. How can you go wrong with Dark!Mercury?)


	30. Legend

**Legend**_  
In which there is a history lesson, because Magical!bots r srs bzns. Post Pink, but prior to Shiny (aka, the Seekers are still the Bad Guys)_

_Long, long ago…_

"Wait," Sideswipe said, one hand up, "is this long ago as the humans reckon it? 'Cause that's really not very long at all."

"Yeah, Ironhide's older than the humanity itself."

"Mech, Ironhide's older than _everything_."

Ironhide slammed the helms of the two offending mechs together with a resounding _clang_. "Anyone else want t' comment on my age?" He demanded belligerently.

Tranquility glared at the group of mechs. "Do you want to hear the story or not?"

"You're gonna tell us anyways, no matter what we do." Cliffjumper pointed out.

"That's enough." Prowl said firmly. "Tranquility, please continue."

Tranquility sniffed. "As I was saying: _Long, long ago _–and far longer than humans reckon it, Sideswipe – _even before Time began, there was The One._"

"…this sounds strangely familiar."

"_The One spun two beings out of the ether to explore the newborn Universe, and each were opposite of the other in every way. And so one became 'Light' and the other 'Dark', and each went their separate ways in furtherance of their tasks. In time, Light realized that His opposite had become corrupt in His journeying and now sought to consume the entirety of the multi-verses. However, Dark had been imbued with a great power; and in combat Light could not match Him alone. Thus Light did seek to seal His brother away so that the multi-verses might flourish. Through guile and cunning, Light succeeded in sealing Dark within the form of a metallic planetoid, although the cost was that He Himself was sealed as well, for one could not be free without the other._

_In time, Dark learned to manipulate His prison until He could transform in to a bipedal form. Rather than fight a head-on battle against His physically stronger brother, Light instead created thirteen smaller Champions, which He imbued with His own power as well as the ability to change their shape, just as Dark could. For a time, the battle raged between Dark and the Champions of Light. However, just as Dark became corrupt, so could the Champions. One of their numbers fell to Dark's enticements, and he hardened his spark against his fellows. The battle seemed lost until the twelve remaining Champions pooled their strength. Together they created a massive black hole in to which Dark and the Fallen Champion were drawn, sealed away from reality._

_But because the Thirteen were not complete, so too was the seal incomplete. And so Light did cause Himself to fall in to a deep sleep, so that He might not draw His brother back in to the multi-verses by way of their shared link. But before He slept, He did direct His Champions to multiply against the eventual return of Dark, for in that battle the fate of the multi-verses would surely be decided. And thus the Champions did settle on Light so that they would be near Him when the time came, and, with the last of their Power, brought forth new life._

_And over time, the multi-verses did flourish and new peoples were created out of the ether. But always would Light's children stand fast against the time when Dark and His acolyte would return, a chosen few of them ready to take up the vestments of Power to defend creation once more against the Devourer."_

Tranquility finished her story to stunned silence. She was quite smug about the whole thing, although she hid it behind a veneer of seriousness. "And now you know." She said importantly.

"That…that sounded a lot like the old myths about Primus and the Chaos-Bringer." Mirage said slowly.

"Not myths," Imbrium said from his regular perch on Cliffjumper. "The names tend to vary according to who tells it, but the gist of it is always the same. Your race _is_ pretty old, after all."

"So what you're saying is that the Thirteen were the original Guardians? With the same Upgrades as us?"

"Yes," Tranquility said, "that's it exactly."

"What about all that stuff about the Moon granting us power?"

"It does," Imbrium said calmly. "Earth's moon takes its power from the Light."

"So if Unicron is the Dark…_Primus?_"

"Primus is hardly the only being of Light out there," Tranquility explained primly. "Simply the first. And the humans may be young, but that doesn't mean they don't have their _own_ celestial beings. Jazz and Prowl have already met Her."

"The fairy lady?" Jazz asked, somewhat bemused.

"_Gaea._" Tranquility said with a huff. "Honestly. _Fairy lady._"

"I don't think She'd really object, Quill." Imbrium said in some amusement.

"It's _Tranquility_ you insufferable rabbit, and it's the principle of the matter."

"Okay, back up." Jazz interrupted. "So the Thirteen were th' original Magical Bots, right? And Primus made them so they could change like Unicron."

"Yup. That's how the story goes." Imbrium said while Tranquility sulked.

"…does this mean Unicron was th' base model for our Upgrades?"

There was complete silence as both bots and the advisors processed that.

"Uh. Well, that's a good question. Maybe you should ask Primus next time you see Him!" Imbrium said glibly. Tranquility gawked at him.

"Can't you treat _anything_ with respect?" She demanded shrilly.

"Not unless I have to."

"So," Wheeljack leaned towards Bluestreak, "what do you make of all this?"

"I'm still trying to process the idea of Unicron in a skirt."

"Yeah. Kinda downplays the whole Most-Feared Nemesis thing, don't ya think?"

"The Dark God, the Planet Eater, the Chaos-bringer himself – in a pretty, sparkly mini-skirt."

"Can none of you take this _seriously_?" Tranquility demanded as a chorus of snickers swept through the room.

* * *

**A/N: **Thirty chapters and we finally get to plot! (Not that any of you are really here for the plot, but the bunnies insisted. Sorry.) The creation myth was stolen right out of canon, although I played a little fast and loose with it. (What's the fun of having an AU if you can't twist things?) This chapter is also brought to you by LJ's chickenperson52's plot!chickens, who caused her to randomly post on her LJ about Unicron really being a corrupted Sailor Cybertron. I'd already had definite plans for Unicron and the Fallen, as well as the original 13, but I couldn't resist the idea of Unicron in a sparkly mini-skirt. (Whether or not he actually wore one is up to you. Primus hasn't seen fit to inform me, and I'm not precisely on speaking terms with Unicron and the Fallen. Although I suppose if I ask nicely, Bluestreak and First Aid might see fit to use the puppyoptics on one or both of them...hm.) In any case, her post was the kick I needed to get this chapter out.

It was a toss up between Gaea and Selene, but in the end I went with the personification of Earth because while they're granted their power via the Moon, Gaea _is_ the personification of Earth and she's more equivalent to Primus in headspace. (I suppose I could have gone with the Latin Terra or Tellus, but the Greeks had more personality, anyways. Finally, MB!Gaea doesn't always appear as a pregnant woman in headspace, so there.)

Also, I really ought to go back and change any reference of Tranquility & co as Guardians...since the bunnies have informed me that's what the Magical!Bots are, and not the advisors.


	31. Just Dance

Just Dance_  
Before the war, Starscream hadn't _always _been a scientist…__(Starscream, I am so, so sorry. (Okay, maybe I'm not. Nyah, nyah!))  
Takes places after 'Shiny' and 'Enabler'_

It all started when Starscream caught Cliffjumper dancing.

To be honest, Cliffjumper wasn't very fond of dancing when he wasn't using his upgrade. (He wasn't very fond of using that particular upgrade, either, but no one could really blame him for that. A hyper Cliffjumper was a _scary_ Cliffjumper.) But Jazz had insisted he practice his 'moves' as part of combat training, and Cliffjumper refused to use the upgrade when it wasn't completely necessary.

The first few attempts had been dismal. Cliffjumper was stiff and surly, and the small crowd of bots that had come to gawk hadn't helped. Prowl ordered them all out of the room, following after them to leave Cliffjumper and Jazz in peace. But even with all Jazz's charm, the red minibot still couldn't seem to find his rhythm.

And that, of course, was when Starscream stalked by.

* * *

After Prowl had left them with dire warnings should any of them attempt to return and harass Cliffjumper, the bots had all trooped in to the rec room and set to work.

"Well?"

"It'll just be a click – there!" Windcharger stood back, and the vidscreen flared to life.

"Prowl probably won't like this." Bluestreak said anxiously.

"Relax, Blue." Sideswipe grinned, shark-like. "Prowl only said we weren't allowed to bug CJ. He said nothing about watching from afar."

"Hey, what's on the tube?"

Bluestreak glanced at Skywarp curiously. "'Tube'?"

"Human expression." Skywarp said, waving his hand at the screen. "Whatcha all watching?"

"Cliffjumper making a fool of himself." Sideswipe said cheerfully. "You in?"

"Slag yeah."

They all gathered around the big screen. The hacked security feed clearly showed Jazz and Cliffjumper in the training room.

"…are they doing what I _think_ they're doing?" Skywarp asked incredulously.

"It's training." Bluestreak explained. "Cliffjumper needs to learn to dance, so Jazz is helping him."

"But why does he need to…" Skywarp trailed off as Starscream appeared on screen. "Hey, quick, can you get sound on this thing?"

Windcharger was already scrambling for the controls.

"_Really,"_ Starscream was saying, "_that was the most pathetic display I've ever seen in my life._"

"_Get lost, 'Screamer. Your input ain't needed here." _Jazz said flatly.

"_Yeah, and it's not like you could do _better_." _Cliffjumper added with his fists clenched tight.

"_Please,"_ the Seeker scoffed. _"_Anyone_ could do better. You've got the timing of an overcharged dirt-pounder."_

"Granted, 'Jumper's dancing _is_ pretty bad," Sideswipe commented mockingly, "but it's not like _Starscream_ is any high-class dancer." The two seekers present hastily cleared their intakes as the majority of the room started laughing.

"Starscream could out dance any and all of you Autodorks, easily." Skywarp said derisively.

"He's telling the truth." The deep, quietly amused voice cut through the jeers instantly.

"Skyfire?" Bluestreak asked curiously. The big mech was leaning against the entrance with his arms crossed, a slightly nostalgic expression on his face plates.

"Starscream wasn't always a scientist." Skyfire said. "When I first met him, he was an entertainer. His designation wasn't Starscream back then." He smiled, shaking his helm. "It was Star_song_."

"Wasn't that the designation of one of the elite performers for the Towers?" Beachcomber frowned thoughtfully. "I remember seeing him on vids."

"Yes," Mirage said slowly, "he was quite well known. He disappeared from sight quite awhile before the war, however. No one was quite clear on what happened."

"There was an accident. The medics said his vocalizer couldn't be fixed. Even a complete replacement wouldn't give him back his voice." Skyfire said. He shook his helm. "With Starscream, it's always been all or nothing. If he couldn't sing, he wouldn't dance, either, or have anything to do with the entertainment sector. I convinced him to sign on for a term at the University." Skyfire chuckled. "Even bots who'd been studying for vorns couldn't keep up with him. He's always been a quick study."

"_Starscream?_" Someone muttered incredulously.

"Anyways," Skywarp said, waving his hand dismissively, "the accident may have fragged up his voice, but there's nothing wrong with his dancing. Why do you think TC and I put up with him? It's sure not for his charming attitude."

"Although he _can_ be perfectly charming when he wants to be." Thundercracker murmured.

"No_, you fool; you do it with a smooth forward slide. Honestly, I've seen more grace in a pack of turbo rats!"_

"Which isn't very often." Skywarp said cheerfully. Skyfire ruefully conceded the point.

* * *

**A/N:** ...yeah, uh, I have no excuse. I can't even blame this on anyone this time.


	32. Crossover: Bits & Bytes

**Crossover: Bits & Bytes  
**_Because apparently the girls weren't done playing yet. Takes place in the same AU as 'Crossover: Introductions' and thus is not part of the main story._

"Um," The tiny blonde girl said, her blue eyes huge.

Prowl took in the five human girls dressed in oddly familiar sailor suits, shuttered his optics briefly and activated his comm. ::Prowl to Jazz.::

::Heya Prowler. What's the happs?::

::We may have a situation.::

"I didn't know Sailor Soldiers could be _giant alien robots_." The pigtailed blonde with wings whispered loudly in something akin to awe.

* * *

Mercury was conversing with Perceptor, her eyes flashing and her cheeks flushed with enthusiasm. The other girls couldn't quite make out what they were saying, but knowing the blue-suited Soldier of Wisdom, it was probably complicated and contained a lot of big words.

"Wow," Venus commented, "I don't think I've ever seen Mercury this excited."

Sailor Moon exchanged glances with Jupiter and Mars. "Urawa." They said in unison.

The little blonde leader of the Pretty Soldiers suddenly grinned, her expression crafty. "Hey," she began, "do you think maybe…"

"No," Mars said firmly. "You are not setting _anyone_ up with any of the giant alien robots of this dimension."

"I'm sure Pluto would let them visit!" Sailor Moon wailed. "They'd have the Power of Love on their side! It would be _romantic_!"

"Absolutely _not_." Mars said. "And stop giving Venus ideas!"

* * *

"And then the twins decided to go crashing merrily in to enemy territory with _no backup_ despite the fact that they _knew_ there was an ambush waiting. 'We'll just spring it for them' they said. 'Don't be such a nag, Tranquility,' they said. 'It's only an arm off,' they said!"

Luna patted Tranquility's shoulder with a commiserating paw. "There, there. I understand completely."

"Oh, _please_." Sailor Moon muttered. "It's not like she's never done anything stupid before."

"Once Tranquility went after Starscream on a 'diplomatic mission'." Bluestreak said helpfully. "She was determined to 'make him see the light' since she claimed that none of us were willing to bring him to our side with the power of love, or something like that. I mean, it's not like anyone hasn't ever _tried_ to talk to him, but he's Starscream! Skyfire said he wasn't bad back when he knew him, but talking about Starscream always makes Skyfire upset and he's so nice that no one really wants to—"

"Um, Bluestreak?" Sailor Moon asked with wide eyes, "Tranquility?"

"Oh, right! Well, Tranquility went after Starscream and started talking to him – although really, it was more talking _at_ him and she was preaching something fierce because Tranquility is awfully good at that; she can make speeches for _ages_ and—" Mercury coughed discreetly and Bluestreak cheerfully veered back to the topic "and anyways, she was telling him how he needed to throw off the darkness or something like that and Starscream just laughed at her – _you_ know how he is, you've met him after all – and then Skywarp went to take a shot at her and we had to pull her out really quick and would you believe she actually got mad at us for doing so? She said she really thought she was getting through to him but Skyfire said before that Starscream can be awfully stubborn and he won't go anywhere unless _he_ wants to, and even then he sometimes won't because he's just that stubborn."

Luna blinked and looked over at Tranquility. "Wow," she said, amazed, "I didn't think _anyone_ could beat Usagi-_chan _for chattering when she's excited."

Tranquility was grumbling. "I still think I could have got through to him," she said, miffed. "_No one_ can stay stubborn forever."

* * *

"Oh, _wow_," Venus said almost reverently, "you really are the most gorgeous car I've ever seen."

There was a long pause as everyone processed that. Despite having no facial expressions in his alt-mode, Sunstreaker still managed to exude an aura of immense gloating.

"Hey," Sideswipe said, "I'm the same model. Doesn't that make _me_ the most gorgeous car you've seen too?"

"You're red," Venus said, flicking her fingers. "Sorry, but yellow is _much_ nicer."

"She's got good taste, at least," Sunstreaker said somewhat grudgingly as Sideswipe sputtered. "For an organic."

Venus flipped her hair over her shoulder. "Of course," she said nonchalantly, "I _am_ the incarnation of the goddess of beauty, after all."

"Primus preserve us," Ratchet said somewhat between amusement and horror, "it's a human Sunstreaker."

"You'll take me for a ride, won't you?" Venus asked, fluttering her eyelashes at the yellow Lamborghini, "Please?"

* * *

"What's t' discuss? We run in, shoot 'em up, and leave. Seems pretty simple t' me." Ironhide said, fingering his staff. Mercury restrained the urge to sigh and caught Prowl's optic, who only nodded slightly. She shot him a small wry smile.

"I like your style," Jupiter said with a large grin, "so what are we waiting for?"

"Jupiter," Mars said, slightly exasperated, "we can't just rush in without a plan."

"We have a plan." Jupiter said loftily. "We run in and blast 'em. Simple. Let's go!"

"I suppose every team requires at least one enthusiastic member." Prowl murmured to Mercury.

"She is not normally quite this bad," Mercury replied, her voice close to inaudible.

"I apologize for the appalling influence of my team." Prowl said solemnly. Mercury shot him a quick startled look before smiling shyly at him.

"That's all right," she countered, quiet mischief creeping in to her voice, "I'm sure mine will return the favor tenfold before we return home."

* * *

**A/N:** Characterizations are again anime-based. _Usagi _is the Japanese civilian name of Sailor Moon (as opposed to the English dub _Serena_), and _-chan_ is a suffix denoting affection. I try not to put too much Japanese in to English stories these days (as I used to be absolutely horrible about it) but names are a strange thing. Headspace isn't certain whether the 'bots have downloaded a Japanese language pack or if they all communicate via Magic, but it's leaning towards the latter simply because the former seems too prosaic for this story.

Next chapter shall return you to your regularly scheduled Magical!Bots. Promise.


	33. Just Dance II

**Just Dance II**_  
Directly follows 'Just Dance'  
_

"Yeah, but 'Screamer doesn't dance anymore." Skywarp told the assembled bots. "He says 'there's no need to bother' anymore or some slag."

"That's really too bad," Bluestreak said. "It would have been really neat to see, don't you think? Especially if he's as good as you and Skyfire and Mirage are saying. The war kinda made it so you don't see many professionals around anymore, and it's really too bad. I wonder if…"

Glances were exchanged as Bluestreak continued to wonder out loud. "Fireflight?"

"Fireflight."

"C'mon, Blue." Sideswipe said, cheerfully cutting the rambling mech off. "Got a mission for you."

* * *

"No. Absolutely not."

Somehow, Bluestreak's optics seemed to grow larger, and he shuttered them briefly a few times. "But," he said softly, wringing his hands, "we'd really like to see it."

"Yeah," Fireflight added (and oh, Primus, now _he_ was doing the big-optic thing!) "I mean, you're already so good at flying,"

"And Skyfire said you dance even nicer," Bluestreak continued,

"And I've never seen a real Cybertronian dance before." Fireflight finished wistfully. "Please, Starscream, sir?"

"Think we should've got 'Aid in on it?" Hound murmured to Wheeljack.

Wheeljack took in Starscream's near-helpless expression in the face of the two most devastating bots on Earth (and quite possibly beyond). The former Decepticon Second-In-Command was attempting to keep up a scoffing façade, but he was obviously slipping. "Nah," Wheeljack replied, "Those two have it in hand. That'd be overkill."

"Well," Starscream finally sniffed, "I suppose just one can't hurt. If you're going to see it, you might as well see it performed by a Master."

He was completely unprepared for Fireflight flinging his arms around him in an outburst of exuberance.

* * *

It seemed like half the Ark had shown up for Starscream's performance. Even those who weren't present wouldn't miss out – Jazz had seen several discreet recording devices set up already. He grinned to himself in anticipation. No matter what the outcome, it was bound to be entertaining.

"Is it really necessary for me to be here?" Prowl murmured to him from his side. Jazz shot him a quick smile.

"C'mon, Prowler," he said playfully, "y' gotta admit this is a unique opportunity. An' don't y' wanna see 'Screamer's dance first hand?"

"It doesn't matter much to me one way or another," Prowl commented, "but I suppose I ought to be here for the inevitable scuffle or altercation. It will save me the trip and second-hand reports, at least."

"See? Always a silver linin'."

Starscream made a haughty show of preparing himself before he started as a number of the Autobots snickered in the background. Then he nodded to Skyfire to start the player.

The music that issued forth was something old and stirring; it had been a song made popular at the height of the Golden Age. Jazz offlined his optics briefly in appreciation before focusing on the suddenly still Seeker. Then Starscream looked up and sprung in to action.

He never once activated his jets to lift in to the air, but somehow managed to give the appearance of flying anyways. He flowed over the floor like water; he flew across the surface like wind. One click he was advancing; sultry and smooth in the cool night air, and another he was retreating, beckoning his audience on as his wings dipped and his hands and feet flickered through delicate patterns across the smooth floor.

The audience had fallen silent within the first click. The only sound was the rising chords of the music and the soft growl of heated engines. Even Prowl was staring at the suddenly graceful Seeker, his own pump thumping alarmingly. Jazz was no-less affected, but he managed to regain enough presence of mind to observe his fellow 'bots. And Prowl's reaction gave him a wicked idea. He sent his fellow black-and-white a sideways smirk. "Maybe I oughta get 'Screamer t' teach _me _a few things." He murmured. "Then I can give you a private show."

Prowl abruptly started, optics wide. Within his processor, in perfect clarity, Jazz twisted sinuously in front of him, the very image of power and grace. Things went a little fuzzy after that.

"Prowler?" Jazz grabbed his shoulder and shook him. "Prowler!" Prowl continued to stare forward at nothing, mouth plates still slightly agape. "Whoops." Jazz muttered, and ducked under one of his partner's arms.

"Jazz?" Trailbreaker broke free of his reverie, concerned, "what's wrong?"

"Prowler's a little locked-up." Jazz admitted cheerfully. "Help me get him to Ratchet?"

"Is he going to be okay?" Hound asked as Trailbreaker grabbed Prowl's other arm and slung it around his shoulders.

Jazz waved it off. "Yeah, just give him a few. He used to get this all th' time when we were younglings. Happened whenever somethin' came up that his logic circuits couldn't process. Ratchet'll wanna look at him just in case."

"I suppose Starscream's talents surprised us all." Mirage said, canting his helm to the side as his optics narrowed on Prowl's unresponsive frame.

"Somethin' like that." Jazz snickered as they pulled the senseless tactician out of the room.

* * *

**A/N: **I really just wanted an excuse to give Prowl a processor lock-up. .;;; Well, you know, pretty seekers dancing and _then_ lovers casually mentioning that maybe they ought to learn to dance all sexy-like for a private performance could do that to a person. Bot. Bot-person.

Also, if Fireflight, First Aid and Bluestreak teamed up, they could take over the universe. Thank Primus they fight on the side of good.

Hidamari -- or yoake-mae on Deviantart -- sketched out Chapter 32! It is totally awesome and adorable and you should all go check it out now. You can find it at yoake-mae(dot)deviantart(dot)com / art / TF-x-Sailormoon-dump-156363000 or by clicking the link in my profile. Speaking of Sailor Soldiers, the girls have quite cheerfully taken up residence in my head alongside the 'bots, so there likely will be more chapters with them at some point. (Usagi, sweetheart, put away the giant cape. _Please_. Where did you even _get _that?)


	34. Science

**Science**  
_For Lucretzia, who wanted romance._

"Wheeljack?" Bumblebee called cautiously.

"In here!" There weren't any visible remnants of an explosion, but one could never be too careful in the lab. Wheeljack _sounded_ fine…

But then, Wheeljack sounded fine even when he was missing an arm. Or his entire lower body. Sideswipe had said once that he was a lot like that 'Black Knight' fellow from that British movie. Ratchet hadn't been amused, even if much of the rest of the 'bots had.

Wheeljack was standing at one of the long tables, fiddling with something small and shiny. "Hey, Bumblebee," he greeted, his blue optics warm. Bumblebee smiled back.

"Hey 'Jack. I see the place is still in one piece. And so is your uniform." Wheeljack laughed ruefully at that. Once he'd received the Upgrade, the other bots had quickly found that you could easily judge how much Wheeljack had done by looking at his skirt. Or rather, the tattered remains of his skirt, on occasion. Today, it was still fairly neat, with only a few scorches marring the green material. Bumblebee liked it because it meant that Wheeljack generally kept all of his parts where they belonged. Their upgrades weren't impervious, but they could (and did!) take a lot of damage that otherwise would have sent the 'bot to the Med Bay.

"Say what you want about them," Wheeljack said merrily, "but our Upgrades are pretty darn useful in the lab."

That gave him the perfect opening. The yellow mini-bot grinned up at the inventor. "You know," he said thoughtfully, "Jazz was experimenting the other day."

"Really? With what?"

"Our Upgrades." His expression was of such complete and utter innocence that any other bot would have thought it was genuine, but Wheeljack knew better. Bumblebee only got that look when he was planning something devious. "Or specifically, his and Prowl's. You know that the Upgrades are supposed to be controlled by will, right?"

"Yes..." Wheeljack said, curiosity peaked.

"Well," Bumblebee said cheerfully, "he decided to test it."

"And how did he do that?"

"By seeing if he could get Prowl to drop his by overloading him."

Bumblebee waited patiently as Wheeljack struggled to regain control over his intakes, which had mysteriously clogged up. His headfins flashing a dull pink, Wheeljack finally looked at the minibot. Bumblebee looked back at him, just a trace of impishness in his smiling expression. "Does Prowl know Jazz is discussing their interfacing life?"

"Do you really want to ask him?"

"Point," Wheeljack said, equilibrium restored as he grinned at Bumblebee. "So what made you decide you wanted to share?"

"Well, I was just thinking," Bumblebee said, "I'm not a science-bot or anything, but doesn't proper experimentation consist of repeated attempts?"

Wheeljack carefully set his latest toy down on the table. Then he turned towards Bumblebee, his expression suddenly intent. "And just what did you have in mind, 'Bee?" He asked, and despite the facemask, Bumblebee could easily see the heated smile in his expression.

"I thought we might want to run our own experiments," Bumblebee replied, tugging on the other's skirt with a mischievous grin. Then he boosted himself up on to a clear space of the table, his legs dangling over the edge.

Wheeljack's expression sharpened and he stepped up to the table, one hand on either side of the minibot. "Good science _is_ continual attempts." He decided with solemn dignity. Or it would have been solemn dignity if Bumblebee couldn't see the amusement in his optics.

"How many do you think we'll need?" Bumblebee asked somewhat breathlessly as the green-skirted mech slid clever fingers in to one of his transformation seams.

"We should probably be thorough," Wheeljack purred. "After all, it's for science."

"For science," Bumblebee agreed with laughter in his voice, and then there were no words at all.

* * *

**A/N:** Lucretzia asked for more romance but something unusual "like 'Bee and one of the bigger mechs". I don't think I've ever seen Bumblebee/Wheeljack so hopefully this is unusual enough? (They are...surprisingly cute. Even if 'Jack decided to suddenly turn all sexy-like at the end. That kinda surprised me, but you know. The bunnies know best or something.)

Final Fantasy XIII is currently eating my life, but I'm attempting to get writing done. _Attempting_. *starts inching towards the console again*


	35. Puppyoptics

**Puppy-optics  
**

"Here, kitty," Bluestreak was kneeling on the floor, one hand stretched entreatingly towards Prowl's black cat. "C'mere, kitty. You really ought to get out of there, you know. Red Alert will fritz pretty badly; he already thinks you're a bad idea to have on base. I don't, though! Even if Sparkplug says that black cats are bad luck. I wonder why that is? Jazz said it's an old superstition. Humans have really weird ideas, don't they? Sometimes they even…"

"Blue, whatcha doing down there?"

Bluestreak looked up. Sideswipe was watching him from the doorway with a curious expression. The red front liner's optics flickered briefly to the cat, and if Bluestreak didn't know any better he'd swear something (recognition?) passed between them. Then Sideswipe was grinning cheekily at him and Bluestreak decided he must have imagined it. "Prowl's cat," he explained. "She's under the console and you _know_ how Red Alert gets and I know he'd never hurt her or anything but it would be better if she'd just come out so he doesn't have a chance to get worked up in the first place because it really sucks slag when he does but she doesn't seem to like me at _all_ and I don't want to get Prowl for something like this because he always has too much to do to begin with and…"

"Hey, gotcha. But I don't think cats really think of themselves on the same plane as us. They'll do what _they_ want, when they want and not a moment before." He skipped a beat and grinned. "And Tranquility is prissier than most," he said almost gleefully.

The cat regarded Sideswipe for a long, chilly moment. Then she started vigorously tonguing her leg clean. Sideswipe chuckled. "Just leave her, 'Blue. She'll come out in her own time. C'mon, the game system's all set up, and you promised me and Sunny a rematch."

Bluestreak nodded and started after Sideswipe. Then he paused and looked back. "I really wish she'd let me pet her," he said mournfully. "Just a little bit."

The cat tilted her head to the side as she regarded Bluestreak with unblinking green eyes. Then she slipped out from under the console and bounded out the door, tail raised high like a banner.

* * *

The moon was high, the night was clear, and a little ways away Sideswipe and Sunstreaker were holding off the Decepticons in sparkly _mini-skirts_, of all things. But, as bizarre as that was, it wasn't what was holding Bluestreak's attention.

"You can talk!" he blurted. "Does Prowl know you can talk? I didn't think it was possible; the humans all say that cats are intelligent but I've never heard of one being sentient and you _sound _sentient but…"

"I can talk," the cat cut in. "But you talk enough for both of us, I think. You're part of our team now, Bluestreak, so you might as well get used to my speaking to you." She paused and narrowed her eyes. "And yes, I am _quite_ sentient."

"Um," Bluestreak said. "If I'm part of _your_ team, does this mean you'll let me pet you?"

Tranquility was about to say something scathing but was arrested by the combination of hope and longing on Bluestreak's face. She sighed. "_After_ you take care of the enemy." Bluestreak lit up; brighter than the white full moon hanging in the clear black sky. Tranquility suppressed a groan. _Jazz's right_, she decided, _I'm doomed. He really _is_ too cute to deny._ Then she considered the ramifications of Bluestreak's "puppy-optics" as Jazz called them. _I wonder if his Upgrade will reflect that look...?_


	36. Crossover: Tuxedo

**Crossover: Tuxedo  
**_Set in the same AU as 'Introductions' and 'Bits & Bytes' and therefore not part of the main storyline_**  
**

It wasn't, perhaps, the speech. The 'bot had made plenty of rousing speeches in the past; his charisma had always been one of his strong points, after all. It wasn't his perfect timing, either; he was known for showing up in the nick of time, time and again.

"_Optimus?_" Sideswipe squawked.

"What are you…_why_ are you…?"

"Well," Prime had the grace to look slightly embarrassed, "Sailormoon was explaining how her mate showed his support for her team back in their dimension. When I professed a desire to be of some use, she thought I might want to try it, since her, ah, 'Tuxedo Mask' does not have Upgrades, either."

"I see, sir." Prowl said neutrally. "I don't really want to know where you found a cape in your size, do I."

"She said it was important," Prime explained somewhat defensively.

"Everything hangs on the cape," Venus said solemnly. "You can ditch the hat, but the cape is _sacred_."

"What about the tux?" Jupiter asked.

"…I'm not sure it really would have worked in this case," Mars said. The girls all paused to consider the idea.

"It would have to be a really big tuxedo," Sailor Moon said with wide eyes. "Do you think you could special order one?"

"Oh yes. There are several suppliers who would think of it as a challenge, but not impossible."

There was silence for a moment before the crowd turned on the last girl. "_Mercury?_" Venus demanded. Mercury's cheeks turned bright pink and she looked at her feet.

"Um. I mean. One would _think_ that there would be such a mindset within at least some branch of the fashion industry, and um…"

"It is irrelevant," Prowl interrupted, and Mercury flashed him a quick smile of intense gratitude. "Optimus will not need such a garment, will you, sir?"

"No, definitely not." Prime said hurriedly.

"But Prime," Starscream said silkily from his lofty height, "I'm sure it would be absolutely _dashing_ on you. You do _so_ love human culture, after all. What is adopting one more inane custom?"

"Aw, don't be jealous, 'Screamer. Just because _you_ can't pull off a cape don't mean you gotta take it out on Prime." Ironhide called.

Sideswipe snickered. "I think you've got it wrong, 'Hide. After all, everyone knows 'Screamer's got a thing for the Boss-bot."

There was complete silence as Starscream sputtered. And then Tranquility, who had been quietly seated next to the visiting cats, suddenly straightened with a feverish light in her eyes. "Optimus! Quick, seduce Starscream!"

Starscream nearly fell out of the sky with a screech.

"I can't believe I didn't see it before," Tranquility was saying, a manic smile on her face, "but of course! The Guardians don't bring the Seekers over, the Companion does! It's so simple!"

"…I think you might be trying too hard," Luna said kindly. Imbrium covered his eyes with one paw, groaning.


	37. Picture

**Picture**

"Well, Optimus _is_ our leader, and I thought maybe he was starting to feel left out."

"So you waited until he was – uncharacteristically, I might add – recharging in the rec room after getting overcharged at the party last night."

"Yep."

"…come to think of it, that party was _your_ idea."

"Hey mech, it was totally Jazz's party. I just took advantage of the situation."

"Yeah, but you were th' one who just so happened t' mention we hadn't had a party in awhile. And that we had a perfect excuse what with beatin' up 'Screamer and his pals at that power plant."

"Heh. Hey Jazz. _You _were still the one to set it up."

"And you smuggled in that high-grade, don't deny it."

"Then I won't! Besides, it's not _my_ fault the 'cons decided to plan a morning assault on that research center. And how was I to know that Optimus would go tearing out after them without realizing he was wearing an extra accessory? We _tried_ to tell him to wait, but he didn't want to."

"I don't suppose the idea of calling 'hey Prime, your skirt is showing' ever occurred to you."

"Nope. But hey, next time I'll be ready!"

Cliffjumper was grinning despite himself. "You realize you're gonna get triple-duty for this."

"_So_ worth it." Sideswipe snickered. "Think we can get Megatron next time?"

"Mech, if you can do that, I'll see what magic I can work with the officers." Jazz offered. "Betcha Prime himself would be willing to call it even for that."

Sideswipe grinned at him and gave him a mocking salute. "You've got yourself a deal."

* * *

"He never said I had to do it myself," Sideswipe pointed out smugly.

"I'm always willing to assist with a worthy cause," Mirage said loftily. Cliffjumper just gaped at him.

"No, really. Who are you and what have you done with old Pipe-Up-His-Aft?"

"I'm sure I have _no_ idea what you are talking about." Mirage replied. "Now, I believe there was the matter of payment, Sideswipe?"

"Here you go," Sideswipe tossed him a sealed cube. It sparkled brightly in the mid-afternoon sunlight. "Vintage Towers high-grade, as promised."

"My thanks," Mirage said with a charming smile. "Now if you gentlemechs will excuse me, I have a date."

As the blue spy drove off, Cliffjumper shook his helm. "I swear things just keep getting weirder and weirder around here."

"At least it's never boring!" Sideswipe said brightly. He fanned the image-captures in his hand and grinned conspiringly at the minibot. "Want to come with to show Prime our hard-won prize?"

Cliffjumper barked out a laugh. "Now _that's_ something I want to see!"

* * *

**A/N:** Cara-shrane wanted Prime in a skirt -- and was, uh, quite insistent about the idea .; Prime getting Upgraded wouldn't fit in with my evil -- I mean awesome -- plot, so Sideswipe was happy to oblige.

New picture Deviantart is up! Pretty Soldier Sailor Thundercracker finally stopped being a glitch and allowed himself to be sketched. So check it out if you're inclined! There's a link on my profile, or you can look up 'kaitekat' on Deviantart.


	38. Crossover: An Acceptable Time

**Crossover: An Acceptable Time  
**_Set in the same AU as 'Introductions' and therefore not part of the main storyline_**  
**_For MajinBakaHentai__, who wanted two certain people to meet._**  
**

There exists a place deep within the mists; a place at once both far away and as close your own pulsing Spark. Regardless of its relative position, its quiet halls are as unreachable as the edge of the Universe. Unless, of course, one has a Key - then it is merely a prayer away.

Within the endless dark corridors is a place where the heavy fog thins and a soft light glows. Rising from the mists is the source of that glow: an ornate door that looms tall and is nearly always locked. And save for a single guardian, the door stands alone in the mists, a silent witness to the steady march of Time.

But, from time to time, this seemingly changeless place gains a few additions. After all, even guardians get bored.

At this particular moment in the space/time continuum, the huge door was accompanied by a small wrought-iron patio set. Seated at the table was an elegant woman with dark skin and long glossy hair, sipping gracefully from a delicate teacup. And across from the woman, dwarfing both her and the table, a gleaming giant sat in his own chair and nursed a beverage of something pink and glowing.

"Thank you for the company, Sailor Pluto" the large metallic being said. His optics flashed in the low light. "It's always a delight to speak with you."

"The pleasure is mine, Vector Prime," the woman replied with a slight smile. "After all, we are colleagues of a sort."

"We have had some visitors in my part of the multiverse as of late," Vector Prime said, "although I'm sure you already know of it." Pluto inclined her head in response. "I believe I must concede to your earlier comments. They are indeed quite…interesting, I believe you put it."

Pluto hid another smile behind her teacup. "I hope they are not giving your mechs undue trouble."

"Nothing they can't handle," Vector Prime replied with a wave of his hand. "And the sight of the smallest blonde coaxing the current Matrix-bearer in to a cape and…domino mask, I believe it was, was well worth it, in my opinion."

"My princess has always had a way about her."

* * *

"Good luck with your own Sailor Soldiers," Pluto said, her garnet-red eyes crinkling with humor. "They can be quite a handful."

"I firmly believe in Optimus Prime's excellent coping skills," the Prime replied piously. "After all, he's managed the Autobots for this long, and they're already quite a collection of misfits. Excuse me, a collection of _soldiers_."

"We're all misfits in some way," Pluto said.

"A point, madam."

Pluto took another sip of her tea. "In any case, things must be interesting right now."

"I believe that on Earth one would suggest the foodstuff called 'popcorn' at this point." Vector Prime said.

"I wonder what popcorn tastes like," Pluto mused thoughtfully.

"I haven't the faintest idea, my dear. Perhaps I'll ask the humans when I am next able to cross in to the physical plane. I'll let you know, at any rate."

"You're too kind," Pluto said dryly.

"I aim to please."

* * *

"I do wonder how your allies would react to the knowledge of our meetings."

"Surprise, I would expect. I am not known for having company."

"Besides stray princesses," Vector Prime observed.

"Hmm, yes. In any case, I doubt they would expect me to be hosting someone of your stature. Although really," Pluto said with faint amusement, "why _else_ would I have a Transformer-sized door?"

* * *

**A/N: **MajinBakaHentai asked for Pluto/Vector Prime, and I really couldn't help it. Most of my knowledge of Veccy comes from Wayward's Insecticomics and TFWiki, as well as a couple random episodes of Transformers: Cybertron, so I apologize if I messed up on him :/

Pluto's Time/Space Door appears to be about 2.5 times the height of a tall-ish human, or around 15 feet tall, I think. While this would fit _some_ Transformers, Vector Prime - at Voyager class size - would be a little too tall, I think. So I waved my Magic Author Wand and made the door bigger. _Just because I can._ Being a fanfic author definitely has its perks!

Plot is being stubborn, but I'm wrangling it in to shape. ...I hope.


	39. Rose

**Rose**

The fight was going badly. Bumblebee was down and Prowl was trying to cover both him and the two young humans who had accompanied them. Carly and Spike had been knocked back in to the bushes earlier, and were thankfully staying out of sight. Prowl had the brief thought that perhaps Carly was sitting on Spike to accomplish that, but he quickly put it out of his processor as he sent out another burst of purple light from his scythe.

Shrapnel dodged it, cackling. "You missed, _missed_!"

"Not much of an upgrade," Kickback added. "Maybe you should take it in for a refund."

"Or maybe he should try one of _my_ upgrades," Bombshell suggested, holding up a cerebro-shell. "I bet it would-" there was a flash, and the Insecticon's words were choked off in a cry of pain as he stumbled backwards, clutching his sparking hand. The cerebro-shell fell to the ground with a clatter, and something blue and sparkling struck the ground some distance away, all sharp edges and glimmering in the moonlight.

"It's another of them," Kickback said, grabbing Bombshell by his good arm and tugging him back.

"C'mon, let's scram, _scram_!" The Insecticons beat a hasty retreat as Bumblebee lurched to his pedes, one hand clutching his blaster and the other dusting off his tattered skirt. He looked up in to the trees and nearly stalled at the sight.

Their savior balanced easily on a thick branch of a massive tree, dark paintjob nearly invisible in the shadows save for a gleaming white visor. The strange bot was silhouetted against the moonlight for a brief instant, regarding them silently before leaping away and out of sight, with what appeared to be a long dark cape flaring behind. Prowl made as if to follow but stopped, his scanners aimed in to the darkness. "Gone," he finally said, turning back to his companions.

"Who was that masked mech?" Carly wondered aloud, pulling Spike up out of bushes.

"No one I know," Bumblebee admitted. "But it looks like he left something behind."

The small group crowded around the object embedded in to the ground. It was half as tall as Carly and about as thick as her forearm. Spike reached forward as if to touch it, but Carly snatched his hand back.

"No, Spike, we do _not_ touch strange objects, no matter how shiny they are." She said, exasperated. Bumblebee chuckled quietly as Spike flushed.

"Is that a…crystal?" Spike asked, holding his hands firmly behind him.

"Indeed," Prowl said thoughtfully. "If I didn't know better, I'd think it was a shard from the Crystal Gardens."

"Why wouldn't it be?" Spike asked.

"The Gardens were located in the city-state of Praxus, which was destroyed a long time ago." Prowl said. "To my knowledge, none of the crystals survived the destruction."

"Praxian crystals were special," Bumblebee explained. "Bots spent vorns tending to the clusters. The closest equivalent would be like your flower gardens."

"So basically, if this thing _is _a crystal from Praxus, it's like someone's flinging roses around." Spike said.

"Very sharp and dangerous roses," Carly amended. "I'd hate to be on the receiving end of _that_ bouquet. Worst date _ever_."

"Better make a note, Spike," Bumblebee said cheerfully. "No Praxian crystal bouquets for Carly."

"I'll keep that in mind, thanks."

Prowl knelt before the shining blue crystal and carefully pried it from the ground. It came loose easily, sparkling in the moonlight. "Perceptor will want a look at this," he explained, cradling the long shard in both hands.

"Hey, how come Prowl doesn't get in trouble for touching shiny things?" Spike demanded petulantly.

"Because Prowl has this thing called 'common sense'," Carly replied. "And he's much older than either of us."

"Don't worry, Spike," Bumblebee said cheerfully. "Give it a few million years and you'll be as wise as Prowl."

"Gee, thanks 'Bee."

* * *

**A/N:** Somehow I think that flinging gigantic crystal shards at people is a little scarier than flowers. Just sayin'.

I got bored and drew the Sailor Seekers as human girls this time. If you're curious, you can find the link on my profile, or go to kaitekat(dot)deviantart(dot)com. Now if you'll please excuse me, I need to go poke at the plot a bit more.


	40. Bridge

**Bridge  
**_Follows 'Rose'_

"That's right," Elita told the bot on the other side of the screen, "I sent a team out on a routine raid of the Decepticon base. That's when we found out that someone has been using the Space Bridge behind Shockwave's back." She frowned in thought. "I wish I knew just _how_ they were pulling off that particular trick. In any case, whoever it is _seems_ to be friendly towards the Autobots, at least…they've saved a number of my femmes on multiple occasions."

"So really, it could be from either planet," Optimus mused thoughtfully, "and we've no positive identification."

"No," Elita agreed ruefully. "None of my troops have been able to get more than a brief glimpse of our mystery savior. What we _have_ seen matches nothing on record."

Optimus straightened at that. "…does your mystery savior wear a short covering of an unidentifiable material over his hip plates?" he asked with growing dread.

"Not around their hip plates, no," Elita replied, puzzled. "Although they _do _have something attached to their shoulder mounts. It _should_ be tactically unsound – not to mention look utterly ridiculous – but somehow…"

"…somehow?"

"Well," Elita said, a small smile tugging at her lip plates, "it's been said by quite a few femmes that it's almost…dashing."

* * *

Elita closed down the connection to Earth with no little reluctance. Even with multiple layers of encryption, such calls were risky, and as such were few and far between. Still, after so long with no contact with the mechs on the Ark, it was wonderful to have some connection, however fleeting. She smiled faintly to herself, holding the memory of Optimus' voice close to her spark.

Flareup poked her helm in the doorway. "Hey, has anyone seen Arcee?"

"Not recently," Chromia replied. "She hasn't reported in from patrol yet."

Elita frowned. "She isn't late, is she?"

"She's been going a little further afield than normal lately," Chromia said. "She should be back within the next few breems."

"Thanks!" Flareup grinned at them both and pulled back from the door.

Elita turned back to her console, rubbing her nasal bridge. "All right," she said, "we should go over the reports of the sightings again. There must be _something_ we've missed."

Chromia frowned at her, her optics narrowed. "Be that as it may," she began and Elita looked up in some alarm. _That_ tone meant only one thing. "When was the last time you got some recharge?"

"Ah…"

"I thought so." Elita tried to look innocent, but Chromia wasn't buying. "C'mon, Elita," the blue femme said firmly, "it's time to get some rest. We can worry about our mystery 'bot next cycle."

"But…" Chromia glared at her and Elita managed to hold her gaze briefly before giving in. She really _was_ tired. "I suppose so," Elita sighed. Chromia smiled at her and patted her shoulder.

"I'll finish up here. I don't want to see you for at least a joor. Two would be better."

"Yes, ma'am," Elita replied in amusement and Chromia snorted.

"Off with you." Chromia watched her commander head out the door and then turned back to her own console, rubbing her helm tiredly. "I'll be happy when we figure this mess out," she muttered. "All of this rigmarole is giving me a processor-ache."

* * *

**A/N:** Flareup was never shown in the G1 Femme Contigent -- neither was Arcee, for that matter, she just randomly showed up on Earth in the cartoon -- but I always felt poor Elita needed more than the six that were shown on screen. Plus, it's fun to play around with more characters!

I fooled around with sketches and Paintshop again, so there's another piece of art up on my Deviantart account. It's the Twins and Bluestreak this time. The link is accessible via my profile, or you can check out kaitekat(dot)deviantart(dot)come.


	41. Sticky

_**Notes**: This chapter is proof-positive of why I should not be allowed anywhere near shoujo anime. Ever._

_

* * *

_

The Upgraded Autobots (or the Magical Thirteen, as Tranquility insisted on calling them) were not having a good day. The frantic call from downtown Portland earlier that morning had been bad enough (and hadn't _that_ been fun: the call in question had consisted of one very hysterical mayor and absolutely no visuals; it had taken a good ten minutes just to get him calm enough to explain the situation, as bizarre as it was, and another ten to discover it _wasn't_ the Decepticons, but more of those weird circumstances that kept popping up lately). But upon their arrival to the city, they discovered that the mayhem could and _would_ get worse.

It wasn't every day that previously inert machines grew arms and legs and started attacking people. Well, not on _Earth_, at least.

"It's a _vending machine_." Sunstreaker pointed out, his voice full of horror.

"Yeah, we already got that, smart aft." Ironhide retorted.

"It's a vending machine that shoots _sticky carbonated liquids_."

"Is anyone _else_ here concerned that something is transforming the humans' machines in to weird drones with super powers and super-sizing them while they're at it?"

"_It's ruining my paint job!_"

"Well, Sunny's worried about _something_ all right." Sideswipe replied cheerfully. Then the vending machine turned mechanical monster sprayed him with root beer. "Hey! Slag, how can humans _drink_ this stuff?"

"Is it just me," Jazz asked in amusement, "or does that thing kinda resemble Shockwave?"

"Well…it _is_ purple…and it _does_ have a single optic…" Bumblebee offered thoughtfully.

The machine in question stomped after Sunstreaker, spraying him liberally with cola. Sunstreaker yelped in outrage, flinging attack after dazzling attack at it. "Moon Sunshine Flare! _Moon Sunshine Flare! Moon-Slagging Sunshine FLARE, you spark of a fragging glitch!_"

"…and it _is_ pretty single-minded…" Jazz added. "Sunny's light show doesn't seem t' be affecting it all that much. Anyone else got any bright ideas?"

The vending machine stumbled past Ironhide in its pursuit of the yellow mech with what was apparently its signature battle-cry. "Pitspaaaaaaaaaaawn!"

"Aw, shaddup." Ironhide gave the back end of the mutated vending machine a hefty kick in disgust. The large purple machine groaned in response and slowly toppled over.

Sideswipe quickly capitalized on the unexpected development. "Moon Quake Vibration!" The maroon sphere shot out of his hands and barreled along the ground, smashing in to the downed vending machine with a burst of red sparkles.

The assembled bots glanced first at their adversary, which was slowly shrinking back to its normal size and shape. Then they looked at Ironhide.

"…you _kicked_ it." Bumblebee said slowly.

"Worked, didn't it?" Ironhide demanded. He rubbed the back of his neck cables ruefully. "Besides, it works well enough for the humans. They're always kickin' stuff that don't work properly."

"Better comm. Prowl an' the others to tell 'em the weakness. Then it's off t' find the other 'pitspawns' that're terrorizin' the city." Jazz said, already opening a channel to the tactician.

Sideswipe grinned. "Dibs on the crane game!"

* * *

**A/N:** The monster vending machine is not actually mine – it's from episode two of Fresh Pretty Cure! (and no, I am not planning another crossover. …yet). I watched the episode last night just after midnight and spent the next few hours cackling hysterically because the thing really _did_ remind me of Shockwave: it's a giant purple robot with what appears to be a single optic.

Portland is a city in Oregon, for anyone who's curious.


	42. Crossover: The Power Within

**Crossover: The Power Within  
**_Set in the same AU as 'Introductions' and therefore not part of the main storyline_**  
**

"Oh, _sweetheart,_" the pink-clad human said sympathetically, "that orange, like, totally doesn't do you justice."

Sunstreaker _glared_ and Sideswipe hauled him back. "Okay, Sunny," the red twin said cheerfully, "let's get you _away_ from the squishy fashion police."

"What's a fashion police?" Bluestreak wondered aloud. "Aren't policemen human Enforcers? Why would they need Enforcers for something like fashion? I thought fashion was just how the humans dressed themselves in funny clothes. It doesn't really seem like something that has laws."

"Hey!" The pink one said indignantly. "Fashion is not _funny clothes_!"

"Kimberley, you're talking to Giant Alien Robots." The yellow one said. "I don't think they have the same ideas about fashion as you do."

"Well, _obviously_, if they're wearing miniskirts and bows in _those_ colors…"

"So, we're the Power Rangers." Red told Prowl. "Sorry about the Pink Ranger," he added apologetically, "she's a little, uh, opinionated about some things."

"Jason! I heard that!"

* * *

"Man!" Black exclaimed, "That is a _sweet_ sound-system!"

"Thanks. I'd crank it up all th' way, but I don't think your ears could take it. Humans are kinda delicate like that."

Black sighed. "Yeah," he agreed, "it sucks big time." Then he brightened. "Hey, d'you know how to break-dance?"

Jazz gave him a full out grin. "I think we need to go find Blaster," he suggested, "and see if we can pry Raoul away from Tracks. And then it's _party time_." Black let out a whoop.

* * *

"So…miniskirts?"

"They weren't exactly our idea." Bumblebee said ruefully. The yellow-suited human nodded sagely.

"Yeah, the spandex wasn't our choice either. It _is_ easy to move in, though. You can't beat the flexibility!"

* * *

"It's okay," Wheeljack said cheerfully to the alarmed mechs and colorfully-suited humans who had crowded in to the open doorway of the smoking lab, "their suits are just as resistant to explosions as ours are!"

"Perhaps on the subsequent attempt we ought to decrease the energy output?" Blue suggested, pulling himself out of the remains of the boxes that had broken his fall.

"Billy, you just got _blown up_." Pink said. "Don't you think maybe you should – I dunno – _chill_ for awhile?"

"You know what they say," Blue replied, "You can't formulate an omelet without fracturing a few eggs! Or a transwarp device devoid of a few detonations, I hypothesize."

"Indubitably," Perceptor said happily.

* * *

"Do you ever feel like it's all too much? Like…you've been given this responsibility and it's a little overwhelming sometimes?" The red-suited human shook his head. "What am I saying? You're _Optimus Prime_. You're like a legend in your own time according to the other Autobots."

To his surprise, Optimus chuckled. "Believe it or not, I was young once too," he said gently. "And I was not built to be a war leader. I wasn't built to be any sort of leader at all."

"So what happened?" Red asked. He tilted his head up to regard his companion better from his vantage point on the enormous metal desk.

"I believe a human quote is appropriate in this context: 'some are born great, some achieve greatness and some have greatness thrust upon them'. I was of the latter category."

"That's…Shakespeare, right?"

"Yes. A very wise man, by all accounts." Optimus agreed. "When Megatron attacked, the Autobots needed a leader. And really, I just happened to be in the right place at the right time. I wasn't anything special."

"Kinda like us." Red mused. "Zordon chose us to become the Power Rangers. We were just ordinary teenagers before that."

"Ordinary is a misleading term." Optimus said. "I believe there is a measure of extraordinariness within everyone. It merely takes –" the door to Optimus' office burst open and cut the large bot off. He and the Red Ranger looked on in surprise as a grey and red mech nearly fell in to the room. "Bluestreak?" Optimus asked as the intruder hastily straightened and took two steps inside. "What's wro –"

"Prime! I'm sorry to interrupt, but Wheeljack has blown up his lab again – luckily, no one has lost any limbs this time but there's still a lot of mess. And Jazz and Blaster have taken over the Rec Room and turned it in to some sort of dance hall. Which would have been fine except that Sideswipe tried to drag Cliffjumper in too and then 'Jumper said a few things and Sunny took exception and the Pink Ranger was behind him and started yelling at 'Jumper about 'animal cruelty' or something – she really doesn't like his upgrade – and Sunny used that as an excuse to go after him so Bumblebee and Yellow tried to break them up but Sunny accidentally – I'm sure it was an accident, Prime, he wouldn't have hit a human on purpose! – but he kind of pushed Yellow with his elbow and she went flying but Ratchet says she's okay, just a little bruised, but that made Pink and Black upset and Pink started saying something about Dinozord power – at least I _think_ that's what she said – and I think maybe you better come?"

Red was already scrambling to his feet halfway through Bluestreak's report. "Dinozord power would be very bad," he said, and then added quietly "if it even _works_ out here, what are Kim and Zack _thinking_?"

"We'll be right there, Bluestreak, thank you for coming to me with this." Optimus said gravely. Bluestreak nodded and quietly left the room, doubtlessly returning to the scene in the Rec Room. Optimus waited a beat and then sighed. As Red looked askance at him, the commander of the Autobots covered his face.

"And sometimes a leader's job is attempting to prevent one's team from blowing up themselves," Optimus said in to his hand.

Red let out a startled laugh. "I guess some things are universal."

"Indeed," Optimus agreed somewhat ruefully. "Shall we?" Red stepped on to his offered hand and Optimus carefully transferred him to his shoulder. And together, the Prime and the leader of the Power Rangers headed for the latest disaster on the Ark.

* * *

**A/N:** ...I blame my childhood.


	43. Pet

**Pet  
**_Takes place after 'Pink'_

"You're doing it wrong."

Starscream whipped his helm around, his optics flashing in annoyance. "Who said that?" He demanded over Skywarp's snickers. There appeared to be no one in the clearing but the Seekers themselves.

"I did." A small grey shape detached itself from the tree branches above, fluttering through the leaves on pale grey wings. She – her voice was distinctly feminine, with a rasping undertone – settled neatly on a lower branch so that she was optic level with the seekers, her black-tipped talons closing around her new perch. An organic avian of some sort, Starscream noted. She was tiny in comparison to him, of course – her wingspan couldn't be more than five feet – but a decent size for an organic. A predator, with that hooked beak and sharp talons. She folded back her wings, the dark patterns on her feathers blending in with the trees so that she appeared to be almost a shadow-barred ghost with her predominately grey-silver coloring. "My name is Nubium," the bird said without preamble, "and I was sent here to guide you. You accepted the Upgrades, didn't you?" She didn't give them a chance to reply, raking the three of them with a scornful eye. "_Obviously_ you did, you wouldn't be in those ridiculous skirts otherwise. In accepting the Upgrades, you get me, too."

"Oh, at last, something _useful_." Starscream said. "Just what we needed: our own little organic filth that won't keep its mouth shut."

"I always wanted a pet," Skywarp said wistfully.

"You had a pet," Thundercracker reminded him. "Remember the retro rat?"

"Until Starscream stepped on him." Skywarp said mournfully.

"It wouldn't leave me alone!" Starscream shot back. "Crawling in to my vents, getting tangled up in delicate wires…"

"He was just showing you some affection."

"_It tried to eat my wings!"_

"He _liked_ you!"

"No, you just kept forgetting to feed it. And that's why you're not allowed a pet anymore," Thundercracker said flatly. Skywarp sniffed derisively.

"I am not a pet," Nubium informed them. "And I'm capable of catching my own dinner, thank you."

"Organics don't seem to do well with Energon, anyway." Skywarp said.

"If you're not going to be Skywarp's pet – not that you can _have_ a pet, Skywarp – why shouldn't we just blast you out of that tree and be done with it?" Starscream fingered his star-shaped brooch. "After all, there's nothing wrong with my null ray if I power back down."

"Or we can squish her," Skywarp said cheerfully. "Organics are kinda gross if you step on them, but a rock works just as well."

"It's disturbing that you speak as the voice of experience," Thundercracker muttered. Skywarp shrugged, non-repentant.

"Hey, those little masked furry things were annoying. Even you thought so."

Nubium paused briefly, suppressing the urge to shudder. _This_ is what she had to work with? "Because I have something you need." she said firmly.

"And what could _that_ be?" Starscream sneered.

"Information," she replied. "You don't know how your Upgrades work. _I_ do."

"And you would be willing to teach us how to use our Upgrades? Against the _humans?_"

"Your Upgrades won't work against the Earth or any organism on it," Nubium said. "As I'm sure you've already noticed. Any chance one of your attacks might hurt the Earth – or her children – it will backfire." _Thank the Light_ she added silently. Earth had enough problems already without psychotic skirted Seekers high on magic thrown in to the mix.

"So what good are they?" Skywarp asked.

"I realize this may be hard for your slow processor to understand," Nubium said bitingly, "but there is more out there than the Autobots and the humans. And when those enemies come knocking, you _don't_ want to be reliant on your sworn adversaries for protection, do you?"

"So what are these enemies?" Starscream asked, derision lacing his words. "What could _possibly_ be out there dangerous enough to take on the entire Decepticon army?"

"I don't know," Nubium replied. "All I know is that it's something big and dark and _old_. Yes," she added testily when Skywarp started to snicker, "older than you, even."

"Starscream," Thundercracker said quietly, "I think we should listen to her."

"Are you out of your processor?" Skywarp demanded. "I mean, more than usual."

"Are you? We're potentially throwing away a weapon here." Thundercracker replied. "If she can teach us how to use our Upgrades properly, we should give her a chance."

"You don't even _like_ the Upgrades." Skywarp muttered.

Thundercracker ignored him. "Besides," he added, "we can always slag her later."

"Charming," the bird said dryly. "But true enough, I suppose. Listen," she leaned forward on her perch, her golden eyes intent on the three Seekers. "I'm not here to make you in to something you're not. I'm not going to nag at you to make peace with the Autobots, or the humans, or anyone at all. Granted, it _would_ make things easier," Starscream snorted loudly at this, and Nubium tilted her head to the side, a smile creeping in to her voice, "but to try to force you in to something you don't want is stupid, and that's one thing I am _not_, thankfully. If you go to the other side, it will be _your_ decision, and not until then." And they would go, of that Nubium was certain. It would take time, but she was patient. They might not want to go, and they might complain about it, but in the end, they would go of their own volition. It was the sort of thing an advisor could count on.

"Hmph." Starscream gave her a once-over and then shrugged, his hands dropping from his brooch. "Well, _I_ don't care. Tag along if you want, just don't get in my way."

"Thank you," Nubium replied, barely able to keep the sarcasm out of her voice. Thundercracker regarded her silently before sighing in something approaching resignation.

"So, about these Upgrades…"

* * *

**A/N: **Oh Primus, it's plot. RUN.

Nubium's description was not pulled out of nothing; she's a gyrfalcon. A silver-morph, to be precise. Females tend to be 20 to 26 inches long (about two feet), and their wingspan is generally from 49 to 64 inches across - or about four to five feet. (Thank you, Wikipedia.) A fairly large bird by our standards, although probably not to Starscream.

Starscream might be somewhat mollified (and smug) to discover that gyrfalcons were considered royal birds in medieval times; they were generally only seen on the fists of kings and nobles among those who practiced falconry. (Of course, someone would inevitably point out that eagles were considered to be higher in rank, but shhh.)


	44. Evil

**Evil**

"The good news is we've found Bumblebee and Hound."

"…what's the bad news?"

"They're currently terrorizing City Hall in downtown Portland."

There was a brief pause before he asked, almost dreading the answer. "How bad is it?"

"They seem to be stowing human officials in dumpsters, sir."

Prowl pinched the top of his nasal ridge between two fingers. _At least they seem to be confining themselves to petty mischief for the time being, but that could change at any time,_ he thought somewhat resignedly to himself. "Thank you, Mirage," he said out loud, and Mirage's image in the viewscreen gave him an almost apologetic smile, the Portland skyline a dramatic backdrop to his skirted and collared form. "I believe the term 'I told you so' is appropriate in this circumstance," Prowl murmured in an aside to the bot standing next to him in the communications room.

Jazz smiled sheepishly. "Alright, so maybe pointin' our infected bots in the direction of th' cons and hoping they'd tear after them instead wasn't such a hot idea," he allowed. "Don't suppose Ratch' and 'Jack've figured out how t' reverse our latest mishap yet?"

"You would know as soon as I do," Prowl replied. "Wheeljack informs me it would be easier if he had the original device to study, but it seems that Hound and Bumblebee were fairly thorough in destroying it."

Jazz snickered. "That'll teach ol' Screamer to try to turn our bots evil."

"That may as well be," Mirage said over the comm., "but I do hope that Ratchet and Wheeljack discovers a way to return our comrades to their right processors soon. And I am afraid the situation has become slightly more complicated."

"Please clarify," Prowl instructed, leaning forward with his palms flat against the console.

"There's also a mob of humans gathering around them. They appear to be activists."

Jazz frowned, tapping his fingers against his crossed arms. "We'd better get them clear, too, in case 'Bee and Hound start on them."

"I'm not entirely certain that would be very well received, sir." Mirage paused. "The activists are encouraging them."

Prowl stilled, an expression of disbelief briefly flitting across his features. Jazz, on the other hand, let out a loud guffaw. "Hey, 'Raj, these officials," he said, "Politicians, right?"

"Yes, sir."

"So, out of all the humans they came across…'Bee and Hound are shovin' _politicians_ in the trash. An' the activists are cheerin' them on."

"This is hardly amusing, Jazz." Prowl said. Jazz snickered, waving his hand.

"Hey, we should lead them down to the law offices! Maybe they'll start on the lawyers, too!"

"No, Jazz."

"Aw, c'mon. The humans are always sayin' that lawyers are th' spawn of all evil along with politicians."

"Ah…your orders, Prowl?" Mirage asked. Jazz cackled helplessly in the background, but they both ignored him.

"Please attempt to contain them; preferably away from the humans." Prowl replied promptly. "I'll send Trailbreaker and Inferno to your coordinates to assist."

"Yes, sir."


	45. Breach

**Breach  
**_Precedes 'Hug'_

"The cat," Red Alert said quietly, "is _talking_."

"Now Red, let's not get hasty…"

"_No_, Inferno, we _must_ get hasty! This is a security alert of the highest degree! Jazz I could expect this from" – Jazz grinned openly at this – "but Prowl has obviously been compromised. I can't _believe_ you would go over both the Prime's head and mine on something so…" he trailed off and frowned at Prowl's almost guilty look. "Prime knows, doesn't he." It was a statement, not a question.

"Of course," Prowl replied. "It was necessary to limit the information, but as you said yourself, I could hardly hide such an occurrence from Optimus."

"But you could hide it from me!" Red Alert accused hotly. "I am responsible for the safety and security of the Ark, but I can hardly do my job to proper standards if such breaches are kept from me! You of all bots ought to know…"

"Red Alert," Optimus Prime said quietly, his huge frame quite suddenly filling the door, "that is enough."

* * *

"I don't know why you're making so much of a fuss," Tranquility said in to the tense silence that followed the Prime's entrance. The company of mechs turned to the small black cat, mouthplates agape. She continued her bath with seeming indifference, licking her paw damp and swiping it over an ear. "After all," she said, eyeing her spread claws critically, "you stand to benefit quite a bit by my being here."

Red Alert sputtered in indignation. Optimus sent his security director a quick look. "I don't suppose you'd care to explain that?" He said softly, a thread of command lacing through his query. Tranquility looked up from her ablutions and tilted her head at him, her eyes wide and guileless.

"I'm a _cat_. I can get in practically every crevice in the Ark." She smiled smugly. "_And_ I can now report directly to Red Alert each and every breach the Cassettes can get in to."

Red Alert paused, his optics flashing as he processed that bit of information. Seemingly coming to a satisfactory decision, he nodded sharply. "You. My office. Now." Prowl gave the security director a pointed look. "If you please," Red Alert added courteously. Tranquility blinked at him slowly, and then turned to give her tail a final once-over. Then she stood and stretched, her spine arching up and back as her paws reached forward against the slick metal table, her claws gleaming in the light. Only then did she docilely jump in to the clearly impatient Red Alert's palm. The two sailed forth in to his office, the door closing firmly behind them.

"Well," Jazz said after a moment, "that went well."

Optimus stared at the closed door with a slightly non-plussed expression. "Yes," he said faintly, "very well."

"Almost disappointing," Inferno said cheerfully. "He was working himself up in to a right state, and then the cat comes along and diffuses it, neat as you please. Not that I mind," he added, "but the surprise was sure something."

"Indeed," Prowl said dryly. "Let us hope that when the time comes to inform the remainder of the crew we will suffer similar disappointments." Jazz snickered and Optimus shook his helm, smiling.


	46. Hero

_Follows 'Bridge'_

"If Moonracer snickers at me one more time, I swear I'm gonna kick her aft," Cliffjumper muttered darkly. Sideswipe grinned cheekily at her.

"Well, you've got the pointy heels to do it," he said, and then danced out of the way as the Upgraded femme lunged towards him.

"Settle down, sparklings," Ironhide rumbled at them, and Cliffjumper mumbled something uncomplimentary.

"Sorry, sir, 'Jumper is just so _captivating_; I can't help myself." Sideswipe said with his hand over his spark, his optics bright and guileless.

"I'll give you captivating," Cliffjumper snarled. Ironhide intercepted her with a well-timed shove to her leather-clad chestplate, and then slapped the snickering Sideswipe over his helm.

"Behave," he said forcefully. Cliffjumper sulked.

"I think that's a little like asking Unicron to stop eating planets," Imbrium said cheerfully from his perch on Ironhide's shoulder. "Didn't Chromia say the rendezvous was somewhere around here?"

"Yeah," Sideswipe said, "Arcee should be meeting us." He leered at Cliffjumper. "Want us to leave you two alone so you can have some femme-time together?"

"Are you sure I can't shoot him?" Cliffjumper demanded.

"Not right now," Ironhide replied. "We're on a mission. Wait 'til we get back to Earth."

And that, of course, was when Shockwave's drones showed up.

* * *

The battle was well underway and the three Upgraded bots were making a decent accounting of themselves. (Imbrium had done as any sensible advisor does and turned tail and fled as soon as the drones arrived. He was currently tucked away in the shadows of a dilapidated building and watching his bots wreak havoc with no small amount of glee.)

Sideswipe and Cliffjumper were fighting side-by-side and had just downed their batch of drones; Sideswipe coming in low and Cliffjumper leaping over him, their attacks perfectly synchronized in to twin beams of destruction. The drones disintegrated in the face of the combined assault. Cliffjumper landed neatly in Sideswipe's outstretched arms and the minibot braced herself for the inevitable remark as Sideswipe opened his mouth, his optics alight with mischief.

Imbrium's shout of alarm interrupted whatever Sideswipe was planning, and both bots whipped around, Cliffjumper gripping Sideswipe's shoulder with one hand and using the other to ready another blast on the tip of her finger. Ironhide was taking out four drones with one glowing boulder but another four had crept up behind him. Cliffjumper fired off her shot ("Fire _cannon!_" she snarled, and Sideswipe stumbled back from the recoil, still cradling Cliffjumper in both arms) but only managed to take out two of them. The remaining two advanced on Ironhide, and Ironhide turned just a fraction too late, his hands glowing with an attack that still needed a few precious seconds to warm up.

And then there was a brilliant flash, and the neatly severed pieces of the remaining drones dropped to the ground, lifeless. Several meters away a long shaft of crystal quivered in the starlight, embedded deeply in to the ground. The three Upgraded bots and one magical rabbit looked up…and up…and up.

The mysterious caped bot that was their quarry perched confidently atop a nearby skyscraper, gleaming white visor aimed towards them for a brief moment. Then, with barely a whisper of wind, the figure was gone, leaving behind nothing but moonbeams and shadows.

They watched the sky for a long moment, the Cybertronian night quiet and still with the mangled and blasted corpses of the drones lying scattered around them in mute testimony to the battle that had raged fiercely mere moments before.

"You gonna let 'Jumper down any time soon?" Imbrium finally asked, eyeing Sideswipe - still holding Cliffjumper - with ill-concealed amusement.


	47. Elevator

**Elevator  
**_Takes place before the main army finds out about Prowl's 13. _

They were trapped in – of all things – an elevator. An incredibly well-built elevator of Decepticon design, no less. It was so well-built that their combined firepower couldn't blast them out; even when Cliffjumper pulled out his _big_ gun. They were rising slowly but there would no doubt be a very fast – and very messy – drop once they reached the top.

"This sucks slag," Cliffjumper announced, kicking the wall in frustration. Mirage couldn't help but agree.

As Cliffjumper started adjusting something on his weaponry and muttering under his vocalizer (Mirage tried not to listen; it sounded absolutely uncouth, whatever it was) Mirage ran careful fingers over the seams in the wall. _As we are now, it's doubtful we will be able to escape on our own. And help is still klicks away._ He frowned and shot Cliffjumper a quick look. _Tranquility was quite clear that we were not to let anyone else discover about our Upgrades. But short of decommissioning Cliffjumper for a brief time so I can deliver us both to safety, I don't see any other course of action. _As tempting as such a base action could be (Cliffjumper was a good ally, but could get on his last nerve on occasion) it would likely cause more problems than it would solve (starting with attempting to haul his unresponsive frame across enemy territory and ending with the likely repetition of another 'Decepticon Spy' episode, neither of which were very appealing at the moment).

"Hey, blue-boy," Cliffjumper interrupted his ruminations and he turned, startled. "Got any bright ideas over there?"

Mirage paused briefly, and then bowed to the inevitable. "Yes, actually. Perhaps, instead of applying heat, cold might prove a better medium to aid in our escape."

Cliffjumper snorted. "Can't hurt, I guess. What, you got some sort of freeze-ray hidden up your aft?"

Mirage smiled grimly. "Better, I think. If you could please shield your optics for a moment?"

Cliffjumper barely had time to shutter his optics before the elevator was awash in light. And then the sparkles consumed them both.

* * *

Much later, when both skirted and un-skirted mechs were finally clear of the frozen remains of the Decepticon death trap, Cliffjumper was still trying to cope with Mirage's explanation.

"But why the skirt and bows?"

"Unfortunately, I have yet to secure a satisfactory answer to that myself." Mirage said, his tone clipped.

Cliffjumper couldn't hold back the laughter anymore and Mirage folded his arms, long-suffering annoyance clear over every inch of his frame.

He almost looked forward to the lecture he was sure to receive upon their return to base. Surely it couldn't be any worse than _this_.


	48. Magic

**Magic**  
_Follows 'Black Cat'._

"Surely you must understand that our abilities will not remain secret for long," Prowl said reasonably.

"Of course they will," Tranquility said. "The magic will keep it that way, so long as you don't do anything _too_ obvious."

"But Jazz introduced himself on both occasions we clashed with the Decepticons while upgraded."

Jazz snickered. "Champion of truth, justice and rock 'n roll, that's me!"

"And besides that, the only changes to our plating while in that state are relatively minor. Anyone with a functioning set of optics will easily recognize us."

"Except that they won't," the small black cat replied smugly. "Did any of that second group tonight recognize either of you at all?"

"Nope," Jazz replied. He glanced over at Prowl, who was still regarding them both with a skeptical expression, and tapped the Upgrade panel attached to the armor over his spark chamber contemplatively. He felt that the panel itself was pretty obvious – deep blue with an engraved silver crescent moon that sparkled brightly in the moonlight, and a dark grey with the same silver moon for Prowl – but Tranquility had earlier assured them that no one would even notice it when they weren't using their respective Upgrades. "Woulda thought 'Screamer might have said something about it at the very least; he never can stop running his vocalizer."

"Perhaps he was trying to suppress the horrific experience," Prowl replied dryly. "In any case, we didn't really give them a chance for conversation. Our arrival left each group of Decepticons in a state of confusion to the extent of an extremely fast retreat once we attacked."

"Cause we're just that good."

"That, and they likely assumed Wheeljack has developed some sort of super weapon. I'm sure in subsequent attacks they will rally a more effective defense."

"Regardless of what they thought," Tranquility interrupted, eyeing them both, "The magic was doing its job. They might have been surprised, but trust me; none of your enemies recognized you. The magic would have distorted the name-dropping without being noticeable."

"Convenient, that."

"As long as no one sees you transform, the magic will keep anyone else from discovering your true identities," Tranquility explained. "Or, well, unless it's necessary for them to know," she added meticulously. "Then they won't be affected."

"But that makes no _sense_," Prowl said, and Jazz was hard-put to restrain the smile fighting to break free at the faint note of complaint in Prowl's voice.

Tranquility sniffed. "It makes perfect sense," she retorted. "It's _magic_."


	49. Glow

**Glow**

"Uh, Sunstreaker…did you know that you're…"

"Shut. _Up_." Sunstreaker, his plating glowing bright enough to be seen from Cybertron (or very nearly), gave Skydive a glare that could freeze an O-class star. Skydive gulped and flattened himself against the wall, his wing catching painfully behind him as Sunstreaker stalked past him and in to the Med Bay, the door slamming shut behind him. With his exit, the lighting in the hallway immediately returned to its normal levels and the three bots vented a sigh of relief.

"He's awfully bright today," Skydive remarked, wincing. Air Raid grinned sympathetically and hauled him away from the wall, and Fireflight soothed his aching wing with careful fingers. Skydive rumbled softly in gratitude, and the three shared a quick smile.

"Maybe it's that time of the month." Air Raid offered cheerfully.

"What time of the month?" Fireflight asked curiously. Air Raid shrugged.

"_That_ time. Spike mentioned it before about Carly. Whenever she gets especially glitchy, he just shrugs and says it's _that_ time of the month."

"Does she glow, too?"

"Not that I've noticed."

"Humans do that when they're incubating young." Skydive said sagely.

"How do you know that? _You've_ never seen a pregnant human."

"No, but the internet said so."

"The internet said what now?"

Silverbolt, standing at the end of the hall with his arms full of data pads, regarded the three with no little trepidation. Fireflight turned to him and smiled, his optics wide and innocent and full of absolute trust. "Is Sunstreaker _carrying_?" he asked eagerly.

"Carrying what?" Slingshot asked, poking his helm out from behind the perplexed Silverbolt. "Some horrible virus-ridden glitch?" He grinned with a touch of maliciousness. "That would explain his stupid, stuck-up attitude."

"Slingshot," Silverbolt reproved. Slingshot shrugged.

"Well, it would."

"Nope," Air Raid said cheerfully. "Sparklings. Wonder who knocked him up?"

"Knocked…" Silverbolt began, but he was interrupted by a loud crash from the Med Bay. All five bots turned as one to observe the closed doors in silence.

"I bet it was Ratchet," Slingshot said suddenly, snickering. There was another _thump_ from behind the huge double-doors, and then what sounded like their CMO letting loose in a full-blown diatribe, his individual words muffled and indistinct to the Aerialbots' sensors.

"I bet it was Bluestreak and that's why Ratchet's blown a fuse," Air Raid suggested after a beat.

"Ironhide."

"Arcee."

"Bumblebee."

"Tracks."

"Sideswipe!"

"_Prime_."

"That's it," Silverbolt said loudly over the suggestions that continued to pile out in a gleeful clamor, "no more _All My Children _for you lot." Their immediate appeals for reprieve were drowned out by another loud _thump_ from the Med Bay. They paused, staring at each other, before collapsing to the ground in a fit of giggles and snickers. Silverbolt alone remained standing, his optics shuttered and his face set in an expression of long suffering.

Even still, he couldn't quite help the corner of his lip plates twitching upwards at the antics of his wingmates.

* * *

**A/N: **I'm not entirely certain how _typing class_ managed to inspire this. All I know is that I had to pause in my Speed and Accuracy I in order to write out the bones of this and then email it to myself so I could polish it once I got home. (Also, school is eating my brain. I have so much medical terminology stuffed in my poor head; I'm surprised it hasn't burst yet.)

There's another picture up on my Deviantart for this series - this time of the Starlight!Minibots. The link, as always, is accessible via my profile. (If you've visited my DA in the past few weeks, you might've already seen it.)


	50. Frozen

**Frozen  
**_For curse-of-the-cat, who wanted to know about Mirage._

When Mirage rejoined the land of the functioning, there was no sign of Hound or the strange organic creatures that had attacked them. Of course, the thick fog that that had appeared with the creatures and still hung heavy in the air wasn't helping at all. The last thing he could remember before he had blacked out was Hound's voice shouting something incomprehensible, and then something lighting up the fog sparkling a brilliant green. All trace of that strange green light was gone, and Mirage wondered if he might have imagined it.

Then he realized he was not alone.

"What in Primus' name…?"

"Wrong deity," the cat – she certainly _was_ a cat, he thought, despite her mastery of speech – mumbled around the edge of a large, enameled panel. She gingerly released the object from her mouth and nudged it towards him with her nose. "Here, take this."

"You are Prowl's cat." Mirage said in surprise. "But how did you get so far from the _Ark_? And…forgive me, but I was unaware that Earth felines have the ability to acquire human languages."

Tranquility sniffed. "I am my _own_ cat, thank you," she told him primly, "and I am quite capable of 'acquiring' as many languages as I would like." He noticed that she didn't bother to answer his first question. "But that can wait for later. Take the panel. Quickly now, there isn't much time."

Mirage eyed it distastefully. "_Must_ I?" The round item glimmered quite prettily in the moonlight – pale blue with a silver crescent moon embossed in the center – but it had still been dragged through the dirt; not to mention that part of it had been in the animal's _mouth._

"If you want to save your friend, then yes, you must." she retorted.

"Hound!"

"Precisely. He's still hanging on, but he needs your help. Now pick it up and affix it just over your spark chamber, and repeat after me…"

* * *

Later, after the battle was won and explanations had been made – briefly, because Tranquility had done as cats are wont to do and disappeared fairly quickly – Hound and Mirage sat side-by-side in a sheltered overhang as they watched the stars come out. The pervasive fog had started dispersing as soon as the last creature was dispatched and now only a few stubborn wisps clung to the cool night air.

They had finally managed to report back to the _Ark_ via comm. link, and received orders to return to base by dawn. Mirage was surprised, but Prowl had simply said that he might appreciate some time away to adjust, first. He'd also said something about recharging in the moonlight, which had puzzled Mirage, but Hound had simply laughed and promised to explain later.

But as curious as the orders were, dawn was still some time away, and it was very nice to sit in the starlight; just two ordinary mechs enjoying an ordinary night out with the waning moon and stars as quiet company.

Mirage's fingers grazed the new transformation plate adorning his chestplate. _Well, perhaps not so ordinary._ The power that had welled up so easily in Spark was like nothing he'd ever felt before. Even without the Upgrade activated, he could still feel the coldness of the ice sliding against his palms as he had flung shards like javelins at the slimy organic mutations, still taste the sudden sharpness in the air like a glacier breeze as the power swirled around him and settled like a second set of plating over his frame. It was both unsettling and glorious. He clenched his hand in to a fist, and he could almost see the pale blue sparkles swirling around it.

Hound seemed to notice where his attention had strayed, because he chuckled softly. "Ice, huh?" he said. He looked back up at the glittering stars. "It suits you."

"Cold, aloof and unfeeling?" Mirage asked dryly. Hound shook his helm.

"Beautiful," he said instead, looking back at him with a smile. And just like that, Mirage could feel warmth well up within his Spark that quite overwhelmed the cold and magnificent power of earlier, making it seem like a faint summer breeze in comparison.

* * *

"I'm glad you're with us now," Hound said. "Maybe it's selfish of me, but I feel better with you by my side. And now I don't have to hide this part of me from you anymore."

"I'm glad that I am with you, too." Mirage admitted. "I knew that there was _something_ different with you and the others, but I couldn't fathom what it was. I suppose I'm simply not used to you being involved in covert operations without me."

"Were you jealous?" Mirage turned to regard him in surprise at the question, but Hound was grinning mischievously.

"Oh, yes," Mirage replied, deadpan. "I was certain that Jazz and Prowl had commandeered you for their nefarious purposes. A giant harem, I'm sure, with you caught neatly in their net."

Hound snickered. "Jazz, sure – but Prowl?"

"Prowl is sneaky," Mirage explained loftily. "It's always the quiet ones, after all." Hound started laughing in earnest, and Mirage permitted himself a small smile.

After all, it was only the truth.


	51. Change

**Change  
**_Follows 'Evil' _

"The good news is: we've restored Bumblebee and Hound's personalities!"

A cheer went up among the bots waiting outside the lab. However, Prowl alone remained quiet. When the clamor died down, he regarded Wheeljack with steady optics. "And the bad news?"

"Uh, well…" Wheeljack twisted the hem of his skirt in his hands sheepishly. "They're not exactly…in their right bodies anymore."

"It's okay, Wheeljack." A high, feminine voice that was remarkably familiar piped up from behind him. "I'm sure you'll get it right in no time."

There was silence, and then Sideswipe grinned widely. "You turned Bumblebee into a femme?"

"Well, _sort_ of…"

Eagerly, Sideswipe pushed past him into the room and looked around. He automatically dismissed Perceptor and the human girl on the other side of the lab as unimportant, scanning the room with increasingly puzzled optics as his search failed to reveal his quarry. The high orange walls revealed no flash of yellow paint or invitingly curved chassis.

"Down here, Sides'," the voice said in amusement. Sideswipe looked down and yelped, stumbling back against the wall in surprise.

"Bumblebee? Is that you?"

The very small, very human girl smiled up at him, her twin blonde pigtails swinging cheerfully behind her. "Hiya," she chirped. Her blue eyes were much brighter than that of any human Sideswipe had ever seen, almost glowing, even in the bright light of the lab. But the short gold skirt and the gold sailor collar with black bows that she wore left no question to her identity. "Hound got zapped too," she said, jerking back with her thumb at the green haired girl perched on Perceptor's leg. Sideswipe finally noted the green skirt and orange bows she wore: the exact same that Hound was wearing when he – she? – hadn't been so…squishy.

"You're _human_," Sunstreaker said in horror, peering in through the doorway. Bumblebee laughed.

"It's not so bad," she said. "For now, at least. It took a little bit to get used to walking without stabilizers, though."

Hound was staring at her outstretched hands in bemusement. "I always wondered what it would be like to be organic," she said, wiggling her fingers. "I never thought I'd get the chance, though."

"I don't suppose you know how long they'll be like this," Mirage asked Wheeljack, pained. Wheeljack laughed ruefully.

"Let me get back to you on that. I still haven't figured out _why_ they changed…something to do with the magical fields the Upgrade produces, maybe…?"

"But you can reverse the process, correct?" Prowl asked.

"Um. Yes, of course. I mean, I should be able to." Wheeljack glanced at the device on the table that had caused the mess. "Hopefully."

"With time and study, anything is possible," Perceptor offered cheerfully. "Now, Hound, if we could return to our previous discourse regarding your current condition…"

Bumblebee grinned mischievously. "So…can I go find Spike now?"


	52. Overgrowth

**Overgrowth**

"Well, look what we have here. If it isn't one of the pretty-skirted Autobots, all alone and far from help." Runabout grinned nastily. "What do you say, Runamuck? Should we see if he bleeds sparkles?"

"Heh, I bet he'd make an awesome explosion," Runamuck replied, his optics alight.

_I don't want to hurt anyone! _First Aid thought desperately, backing away from the grinning Decepticons. _Please, just give me something to stop them!_

At his feet, the bed of wildflowers began to glow.

* * *

When Ironhide arrived in response to First Aid's distress beacon, he had thought he was ready for anything. However, the sight of First Aid untouched and the Battlechargers wrapped neatly in gigantic vines with supersized wildflowers sprouting around them struck him dumb, and he skidded to a stop to gape. Then he shrugged and raised his rod, preparing to finish the job.

"Don't hurt them!" First Aid called frantically. Ironhide stared at him, his rod wavering in his hands.

"The 'cons?" he asked incredulously, but First Aid shook his head.

"The flowers!" he wailed. "They're alive too, and it's not their fault!"

Ironhide took in the furiously struggling Battlechargers (who just seemed to be tangling themselves further, but he was hardly going to tell them that) and then turned back to First Aid. "'Aid," he said impatiently, "m' Upgrade is _fire-based_.What do ya want me to do?" Then he looked back at the plants, this time in grudging admiration. "How'd that happen, anyways?"

"I made the flowers grow with my Upgrade," First Aid replied sheepishly. "They didn't like being stepped on."

"…Huh. Can you make 'em ungrow?"

First Aid shuttered his optics briefly, and then looked at the tangled mess of vines and Battlechargers. A bright yellow buttercup waved merrily at him from above Runabout's helm. "…um. I don't think so."

Ironhide sighed and turned on his comlink. :Ironhide to Base…got a bit of a weed-problem here.:


	53. Switch

**Switch**

"No, no, Prowl's not _Prowl_," Mirage insisted.

"Yes, I am," Prowl said. "Of course I am; I'm black and white and I have a stick up my…"

"_Sideswipe,_" Sunstreaker said, warning clear in his voice.

"No backtalking your commanding officer," Prowl retorted, his expression far too gleeful, "or it's off to the brig with you!"

"Don't you _dare_ send my frame to the brig, you aft. I just got it polished." Hound looked down mournfully at his green paintjob, his hands flicking disdainfully against his chassis. "Unlike _this_ one…why couldn't I get switched with Mirage? _He_ at least knows how to take proper care of himself…"

"Thank you," Wheeljack said, amused. "I have been attempting to pass on such habits to Hound, but the progress is slow-going."

"There's more to life than the washracks," Sideswipe said philosophically.

Seven of the Upgraded bots had crowded into the medbay. That in itself wasn't unusual these days; Ratchet could expect any number of them in or out of their Upgraded transformations on a berth throughout the week from a bewildering array of damages that had occurred in the heat of battle. Sometimes the damage was normal, like scrapes or dings or someone's arm getting torn off. Again.

And sometimes it was Sunstreaker, mad as a cornered turbofox and covered in glitter from helm to pede. (And wasn't _that_ a repair and a half: dealing with both the ridiculously sticky glittering substance and Sunstreaker's howls of outrage that he was going to _get_ the glitch, just see if he didn't, and Bumblebee prudently staying as far away as possible.)

The point was that Ratchet had seen a lot. Nothing Prowl's team of 'magically' Upgraded misfits could do should surprise him anymore.

He really should have known better than to tempt Primus.

"Sideswipe is Prowl is Sunstreaker is Hound is Sideswipe," Mirage said when prompted about the predicament that had landed them all within the medbay. He was fidgeting, seemingly ill at ease in his frame, which in itself was odd; Mirage was normally the epitome of calm control. This, however, seemed insignificant in the face of the fact that he had not stopped running his vocalizer since he had entered the medbay.

_Mirage_. Acting very not-Mirage-like as he scattered words like the skies above Portland scattered raindrops. (Which was to say, not so much 'scattered raindrops' as poured a lot of water down from the sky for a fair amount of the year. He was no Hound to get all soppy about weather patterns and organic life, but this planet could be pretty damn amazing in its own way.)

Ratchet resisted the urge to reset his optics. "Will someone please explain to me what happened?"

Sunstreaker – or whoever – opened his mouth to reply, but Mirage beat him to it. "See, there was a bright light when we were out fighting those shadow-things – the ones that are kinda like drones in that they're pretty weak and stupid but there's tons of them so you have to be careful not to get overwhelmed – and we beat them, of course, but then there was that light and everything went all sparkly and then everyone got mixed up and we don't know how so Prowl said we had to come see you immediately before Sideswipe started abusing 'the power implicit in his borrowed frame' –"

"I would not abuse my power," Prowl said sulkily. "No one ever lets me have any fun."

"Because we _know_ you," Bluestreak pointed out. Prowl huffed.

"—and Jazz went to go report to Optimus 'cause his group didn't get zapped and Prowl wanted us all to stick together, even Sunstreaker, which really upset him 'cause he said – Sunstreaker said, I mean, not Prowl 'cause Prowl wanted us here so you can fix us – anyways, Sunny said that he had more important things to do –"

"Like getting to the washracks and having a good, _thorough_ scrub," Hound said tightly. "I have…there is…_do you ever even use the washracks?"_

"Of course I do," Sideswipe said mildly, "but before the fight, Trailbreaker and I found this little copse with the mostinteresting life forms underneath a fallen log, and…"

"I. Don't. _Care_."

"—and anyways, you can fix us now, because you're _Ratchet_ and you can fix anything," Mirage finished in a rush, smiling brightly. "Like that time when Sideswipe got stuck in a tree and got bark stuck up his tailpi—"

"Blue!" Prowl grabbed Mirage's shoulder, a look of horror crossing his faceplate. "That _never happened_, remember?"

"Okay," Ratchet said, resisting the urge to beat his helm against the wall. "Thank you for that, Bluestreak. Now, which one is Wheeljack?"

"Here, Ratch'," Bluestreak said cheerfully. "I tried to get a scan of the light that caught us but the readings are looking pretty weird."

"You all appear to have undergone a mass personality transfer," Ratchet said dryly. "Somehow I'm not surprised that the cause of it all seems 'weird'."

* * *

**A/N:** For the horribly confused:

Prowl is in Sunstreaker's body  
Sunstreaker is in Hound's body  
Hound is in Sideswipe's body  
Sideswipe is in Prowl's body  
Bluestreak is in Mirage's body  
Mirage is in Wheeljack's body  
Wheeljack is in Bluestreak's body.

Yes, I am a horrible person and not at all dead as I may have appeared to be. (Done! College! YAAAAAAAAAY. Now off to be a responsible adult or something.)


	54. Uniform

**Uniform  
**_Follows_ '_Change'_.

Hound tugged at edge of her pleated skirt uncomfortably. Bumblebee gave her a not unsympathetic smile. "You shouldn't worry at it too much," she offered.

"I didn't expect it to itch so much," Hound said, half a complaint and half an explanation. "It was never a bother before."

Bumblebee shrugged philosophically. "Well, it _is_ a little different than before. But you're right, I didn't really think of it that way before now, either. It's the collar that gets me." She tugged at it to demonstrate. "It's so confining!"

"And the bra," Hound added with a rueful smile. "It pinches. I can appreciate the support, I guess, but does it have to feel so uncomfortable?"

"Apparently you get used to it. Still," Bumblebee sighed somewhat wistfully, "I can't wait 'til we get home and we can take it all off."

"I'm not even sure I'll be able to get it off." Hound fingered the dip between her breasts in memory. "The clasps were hard enough to put on to begin with! I had to get Carly to help in the end, and she's working late tonight so no help there."

"I'll help with yours if you help with mine," Bumblebee offered cheerfully.

* * *

The two transfer students veered into a classroom, still chattering cheerfully. The four boys following behind them had somewhat wild eyes.

"Not used to bras," one of them said, swallowing.

"Or skirts," another added.

"Or maybe clothes?"

They stopped outside the door to consider that. Almost as one entity, they peered inside the classroom. The cute pig-tailed blonde and the one with funky green hair were perched on desks with their legs spread wide and skirts hitched up. Their skirts were barely preserving their modesty until one of their female classmates hastily mentioned something to them that made them close their legs and fix their skirts. Their cheerful smiles never faltered as they apparently thanked the interfering girl. The boys ducked back outside.

"I heard they're _foreign_," the last said in a low, reverent voice.

"Wherever they're from, I want to transfer there," the first said, and his friends nodded hasty assent.

* * *

"So, how went the mission?" Jazz asked them later when they had returned to the Ark.

"Success," Bumblebee confirmed, stretching her arms out with a pleased smile, finally free of the constraining uniform. "As we figured, the music teacher was a monster. We took it out with none the wiser and found the real teacher locked in a closet, disoriented but generally well."

"Any problems getting back?"

"A few of our temporary classmates were a little too enthusiastic about escorting us home," Hound said. "We managed to lose them before we left town. I felt kinda bad about it; they really wanted to make us feel welcome."

"The kids in that town are sure friendly," Bumblebee agreed. "The ones at St. Luna's High School especially." She held up the pleated skirt and pressed white blouse and tie that made up the girls' uniform for the school thoughtfully. "I wonder if Carly would want this."

"Dunno what she'd do with a catholic school uniform," Jazz said. Then he laughed. "Then again, she might just find a use."

* * *

**A/N: ** ...yeah, I was just looking for an excuse to shove 'em in the uniforms. I dunno how the boys snuck in; they just did. St Luna's High School is completely made up. Any resemblance to any actual schools is purely coincidental.


	55. Sidekick

**Sidekick**_  
Follows 'Hero'_

"Where is Arcee, anyways?" Cliffjumper muttered, dusting off her skirt and pointedly looking away from Sideswipe. For once, Sideswipe's vocalizer was blessedly silent, though he gave Cliffjumper a considering look. Imbrium watched them both, his leporine lips twitching upwards.

"Not like her to be late," Ironhide commented. "No, wait…there's an Autobot signal approaching. Now why ain't she shielded? This ain't exactly friendly territory."

Sideswipe looked in the direction of the approaching signal and frowned. "That doesn't look like…"

"Chromia!"

* * *

Unfortunately, Chromia, dusty and strangely disoriented, had brought friends. A formation of drones buzzed angrily behind her. In her bewildered state, she barely seemed to notice them. "'Hide? Didn't you lot head out to meet Arcee?"

"Chromia, down!" She flattened immediately at Ironhide's terse order and the Upgraded bots fired at will. Ironhide made his way to her side as sense rapidly returned to her optics. Pulling out her gun, she started firing on the drones even as Ironhide pulled her to her pedes.

"This isn't the base," she commented steadily.

"Nope," Ironhide replied. "Quite a ways from it."

"I have no idea how I got here," Chromia admitted.

Despite their determined efforts, the drones seemed unending. "Retreat!" Ironhide ordered, backing up with one hand on Chromia's shoulder to steady her. "There's a bit o' cover to regroup in. Head to it!"

* * *

Behind the barrier, the Upgraded bots plus one femme continued to fire on the drones. Imbrium, perched on Cliffjumper's shoulder, ignored the battle and regarded Chromia thoughtfully.

"So," he said casually, "been getting these blackouts a lot lately?"

Chromia jerked in surprise, her latest shot going wide. "How did you know?"

Imbrium just nodded as if it made perfect sense. "Sideswipe," he called.

"Yeah, boss-rabbit?"

"Do me a favor and jump out in front of the 'cons?"

Sideswipe grinned at him cheerfully. "Sure thing, boss!" And with a kamikaze yell, he leapt out from cover. The staccato sound of laser fire accompanied the red mech's whoops and Ironhide cursed, getting ready to leap over the barrier.

"Wait," Imbrium ordered tersely, his eyes never leaving the blue femme.

Chromia's optics flared and she doubled over as a bright light enveloped her frame. The bots had to shutter their optics against the glare. When the light subsided and they could see properly again, a sleek black femme stood in Chromia's place. A gleaming white visor covering her optics was the only bit of brightness on her. But what stood out the most was the long, swirling black cape that hung from her shoulders.

"Chromia…?" Ironhide demanded incredulously. The femme looked towards him briefly before turning back towards the barrier. She cleared it with a single leap, materializing a long crystal shaft as she went and throwing it in one smooth motion.

The battle was pretty much a rout after that.

* * *

Arcee caught up with them not long after all the drones were dust. She regarded the Upgraded Chromia with suspicion at first, and then outright surprised exasperation once her identity was explained.

"I've been tracking her for a few cycles now," she explained. "I could never figure out where she'd disappear to, though, so it's been slow-going." She rested her gun against her shoulder, cycling air through her vents in a huff. "Elita wanted to know who's been saving our afts and to make sure it wasn't some sort of 'con trick."

"Not a 'con trick," Imbrium said reassuringly. "And your friend's random blackouts should stop now, if the lore is right. And it generally is."

"So you _knew_ about this?"

"Eh…sort of," Imbrium replied. "A 'companion' as she's called doesn't show up too often. And it really could've been a trick as Lady Pink here suggested." He nodded to Arcee. "Anyways, we had to make sure. According to tradition, once the companion's identity has been discovered the memory loss and blackouts stop."

"Never should have started in the first place," Chromia grumbled, staring at her hands. "Primus, I look like Jazz and Prowl's love-sparkling. How do I go back to me?"

There was a long pause before the Earth bots and their rabbit cracked up laughing. It took awhile before Imbrium had enough breath to explain the process of reverting to a confused and impatient Chromia.

* * *

**A/N: **Yup, still writing. I have a job writing for an Indie game now, though, so I don't have a whole lot of time for fanfiction at the moment :(. (If you're interested in RPGs and fantasy settings, check out dominionarts(dot)blogspot(dot)com. Our current release schedule is for March next year, but we update the blog weekly with content so people can get a look at what we're doing. Yes, this is a shameless plug.)


	56. Activate!

**Activate! Part I**

The explosion from the power plant rocked the battlefield, and Optimus could only be thankful that all the human personnel had already been evacuated before the Energon blew. Even still, his Autobots were losing badly, and he only had one card left to play.

::Prowl, Jazz,:: Optimus said over a private channel, ::I hate to ask this of you, old friends…::

::No, Prime, I believe you are correct.:: Prowl looked over the battlefield where their forces were valiantly fighting a losing battle. ::The time for secrecy is over.::

::The kitty cat ain't gonna like this,:: Jazz said wryly.

::She will have to understand the necessity.:: Prowl replied. Then he opened a seldom-used channel, to which he, Jazz, and eight other special bots were linked. ::All those with Upgrades are to activate those Upgrades now, by order of the Prime.::

"Shadow Power, Activate." Prowl snapped out loud, the panel over his chest plate turning grey as his Upgrade began its activation with a flurry of sparkles. All over the battlefield, similar fields of light flared up in a rainbow-hued glory. When the light died down, ten mechs in brightly colored skirts and bows stood out amongst a rain of multicolored glitter. Prowl, clad in a dark grey skirt and bright red bow, lifted his crescent-moon glaive in readiness.

"Holy Heterodyne!" Breakdown raised his gun at the still shining beskirted Prowl. "I don't know what you've done, but if you think that that gaudy display could possibly take _me_ down—"

"Moon Shadow Sickle Revelation." Prowl swung his glaive in Breakdown's direction, and a dark shadow of purple and black swept through him with frightening ease, sending him flying for parts unknown. Prowl gave a swift nod and went to search out the rest of the Stunticons, his glaive trailing bits of shadowy darkness behind him.

* * *

::Magical Bots, Upgrade and kick aft!:: Jazz whooped just after Prowl's order. He subspaced his gun and tapped twice over his chest plate. The hidden panel blazed to life in shimmering blue brilliance. "Music Power, Activate!" A blue skirt swirled around his hips and a bright red bow bloomed over his chest plate. He struck a pose with one hand on a jauntily cocked hip and grinned cheekily at Soundwave as the sparkles settled into his plating.

"Display: Futile." Soundwave said. "Autobot destruction: Imminent."

"Moon Rhapsody Resonation!" Jazz called out in lieu of answering, swinging his left hand wide in a move reminiscent of strumming a guitar. Soundwave tried to block, but the blaze of blue light and sound rammed into him, scattering his cassettes wide.

"So many sparkles. Why are there so many sparkles?" Frenzy demanded belligerently. Rumble just groaned from his prone position beside him.

"Query: Mass hallucination induced from prior Energon explosion." Soundwave suggested as he attempted to pull himself up. Jazz just cackled merrily.

"No hallucinations here, Sounders. We're the Pretty Skirted Autobots and we're gonna kick your afts all the way back to Cybertron!" He brought his hands into position once more, a determined grin on his face. "Now, stay _down_!"

* * *

**A/N: **Finally getting over my Christmas cold apparently resulted in my sitting down and working out transformation phrases and attacks for all 13 of the original Magical!bots. Prowl and Jazz's attacks have been shown before, but the next parts will have the new attacks of the other 8 of the first 10. Since this part (and the big reveal!) comes prior to Wheeljack, Ironhide, and First Aid's initiation into the ranks, there are currently only 10 Upgraded bots.

*prods at the story* Where the hell have you been, anyways?

Here's hoping this New Year will get my aft in action for writing!


	57. Activate! II

**Activate! Part II**

_::Magical Bots, Upgrade and kick aft!::_

Sideswipe fired a quick round at Starscream, who dodged it easily while shooting off derisive comments on Sideswipe's aim. "Fragging _finally_!" Sideswipe whooped, ignoring Starscream for the moment. "Sunny, you ready for this?"

"_Must_ we?" Sunstreaker asked, and Sideswipe laughed.

"You heard the mech!" He tapped twice on his chest plate, and the hidden panel obediently flashed maroon. "Rock Power, Activate!"

Sunstreaker sighed heavily. "Sunbeam Power, Activate," he muttered, tapping quickly so that his own panel flashed orange.

The twin Lamborghinis, transformed, stood back to back in their skirts, collars and bows, with Sunstreaker in orange and maroon and Sideswipe in maroon and orange, crescent moons highlighting their helms.

"You!" Starscream screeched, waving an accusing finger at the twins from where he hovered. "You're those things from before!"

"Moon Sunshine _Flare_!" Sunstreaker retorted, and a ball of glowing orange light appeared between his palms. He forced it outwards and up, and it burned in the sky like a miniature sun.

"My optics!" Starscream wailed, and lost several meters in altitude as he struggled to reboot his vision. Sideswipe saw his chance and took it.

"Sunny, gimme a lift!"

Sunstreaker obligingly grabbed his twin and chucked him at the Seeker. Sideswipe grabbed Starscream around the waist and forced him to the ground. "Moon Quake Vibration!" he called, one hand punching the ground and forcing a large maroon sphere to explode in sparkles beneath them, catching Starscream across his wings and tossing them both back up into the air.

Starscream landed in a heap and Sideswipe, hooting with laughter, landed in Sunstreaker's arms. "Slag _yes!_" he cheered, and Sunstreaker dropped him on the ground.

"We're not _things_," Sunstreaker told the still smoking and clearly dazed Starscream venomously, "We're _Autobots_."

Sideswipe picked himself up and dusted his hands together. "_Upgraded_ Autobots," he added, "and don't you forget it!"

* * *

"'Scuse me, Ratchet, I'll be right back, I promise," Bluestreak said, backing away from the medic a few steps. Ratchet shook his head with a grunt, still working away at a groaning Smokescreen.

"That time, huh? Go get 'em, kid. And try to keep your own injuries down!"

"You bet!" ::Bluestreak complies!:: he told the channel cheerfully, and then tapped his chest plate twice. The small circular panel hidden within it flashed baby blue, the inset crescent moon lighting up. "Amity Power, Activate!" A bright flash, and a baby blue skirt and collar and light pink bow appeared on his frame, heralded by a rain of blue glitter. A crescent moon gleamed on his helm. Bringing his hands together as if to form a gun, Bluestreak aimed carefully upwards at a low-flying Skywarp. "Moon Affection Assault!" A cloud of azure glitter burst out of the space in front of his pointer fingers and spiraled towards the startled Seeker. Before Skywarp could teleport, it knocked him from the sky. Bluestreak grinned and went hunting for another target. "I'll be nearby, Ratchet, just sing out if you need me!"

"Don't go too far!" Ratchet hollered back.

"Doc? I think I'm hallucinating," Smokescreen groaned. "I just saw Bluestreak strike down Skywarp with glitter while wearing a sparkly skirt."

Ratchet snorted. "Join the club. Now hold still so I can fix this."

* * *

**A/N: **The amount of switching around I have had to do to the timeline to make things fit, I tell you. As it stands, I have 'Ratchet finds out' coming at some point as he will be one of the ones to find out prior. That, the rest of the 'Activate!' series, and Hound, Trailbreaker and (possibly) Wheeljack's origin stories should wrap up the first arc.


	58. Activate! III

**Activate! Part III**

"I'm sure glad Spike isn't here today," Sparkplug said tightly.

"Don't you worry, Sparkplug," Trailbreaker said as he maintained his force field, "we'll get you and the others home safe, you'll see."

Sparkplug patted one of Trailbreaker's large, black legs, smiling up at him. "I know you will."

"I wish I could have your faith," one of the engineers rescued from the power plant said. He looked quickly up at Trailbreaker. "Not that we're not glad you're here or nothing…"

"My friends are very strong," Trailbreaker assured him. "I might not be able to do much myself besides this, but…"

"But nothing," Hound, ducking down near the force field with gun in hand, shot him an encouraging smile. "We're strong together, all of us. And you—"

_::All those with Upgrades are to activate those Upgrades now, by order of the Prime.::_

"Hound!"

"Yeah, I heard," Hound's smile turned into a grin. "Time to turn the tables!"

"I have to drop the force field in order to use my Upgrade," Trailbreaker said.

"Yeah. I'll go first and then cover you." Hound subspaced his gun and tapped his chest plate twice. The hidden round panel flashed green, and he called out, "Illusion Power, Activate!"

Sparkplug let out a startled oath and stumbled backwards into Trailbreaker's leg when a sparkly green fog enveloped Hound's frame.

"Don't think a bit of weird cloud cover will save you!" Vortex called out. "Take this!"

A few spins of Vortex's rotors dissipated the last of the fog, and Hound stood before them in a green skirt and collar with an amber bow over his chest plate, and a gold crescent moon on his helm. "What the hell...?" Sparkplug managed.

"It's okay," Trailbreaker said, "it's an Upgrade."

"He's wearing a skirt!"

"That's part of the Upgrade."

"Yeah, okay, that's weird," Vortex allowed. "Hey Brawl, what do we do with weird slag?"

"Smash it!" Brawl leapt forward to do as such, and Hound brought his hands up and laced his fingers loosely in front of his optics, palms outwards.

"Moon Dreaming Delusion!" Hound's optics flashed a brilliant green, and a matching green fog seeped out of space in front of Hound's palms and quickly coated Brawl's helm.

"What the…?" Brawl spun around, confused. "There!" And he barreled forward into his quarry.

"Slag it! Brawl, what d'you think you're doing?" Vortex jumped back, engaging his rotors.

"Stay _still_, Autobot scum!"

"Now!" Hound called out, and Trailbreaker dropped his force field.

"Get behind me," he ordered the startled humans. Tapping his own chest plate twice, from which it emitted a brilliant red, Trailbreaker called out "Web Power, Activate!" Red, sparkling mist surrounded him and when it faded, he was wearing a red skirt and collar with a yellow bow. A crescent moon gleamed on his black helm.

"No, really," the engineer said, looking at his hands which were coated in red sparkles, "what _is _this stuff?"

"Moon Resinous Rampart!" With thumb, index and pinky fingers extended, Trailbreaker spread his arms wide, and steady streams of pale red thread spread outwards and upwards until he and the startled humans were covered in a faintly glowing dome.

"It's…sparklier than your normal force field," Sparkplug noticed.

Trailbreaker smiled, slightly bashful. "Well, about that…"

"Hey!" Hound called out, his optics reverting to their normal blue. "Decepticreeps! We're over here!"

Brawl's helm came up, the green fog disappearing from his optics. "You!" he roared and turned to head for Hound.

"No! You idiot, it's probably—"

Hound, displaying far more agility than normal, leapt neatly out of the way, and Brawl ran smack into the red dome. He snarled and braced his hands on the dome to push himself away and soon discovered that the red threads making up the dome wouldn't quite let him go.

"It's stickier, too," Trailbreaker said mildly.

* * *

**A/N: **Coming up with attack names was pretty much my abusing an online thesaurus until it gave me words I liked. (Fun fact: Hound's was originally 'Moon Dreaming Deception' except I decided that it was a little too much 'Decepticon'.) Trailbreaker's ability here isn't the same one as the one he uses in 'Spider Webs' - that one now occurs in a later arc.

Mirage was originally going to be in this bit but it started running a little long. I'll do him next. Spike likely would have shown up here too except that I already wrote his reaction to the uniforms and, well, I didn't want to spoil the surprise for him ;)


	59. Activate! IV

**Activate! Part IV**

"Well, it's about time," Cliffjumper huffed when Mirage relayed the orders he'd received. "Just don't get your sparkly slag all on _me_."

Mirage offered him a faint smile. "I will endeavor not to," he offered, and gently tapped his chest plate twice. The hidden silver panel flashed periwinkle blue, and Mirage murmured, "Ice Power, Activate." Pale blue glitter swirled up around him, concealing his frame, and then dissipated into nothing, leaving him clad in a lavender blue skirt and collar and a violet bow pinned with the hidden panel, now a pale blue to match the skirt, inset with a silver crescent moon. The crescent moon on the crest of his dark blue helm flared a brilliant gold contrast.

As promised, the blue glitter remained on his frame and not at all on Cliffjumper's red paintjob.

"Moon Glacial Barrage," Mirage said softly. Flurries of soft pale blue snow swirled into his cupped palms, and when he blew cool air through them and spread his hands, the intricate flakes of snow clumped together and hardened into icicles. The gleaming daggers of ice flew directly at his quarry with speed, quickly surrounding a startled Blast Off in a glacial pyramid. Almost immediately, the trapped Decepticon transformed and turned his rocket boosters on his prison, but the magical ice miraculously held.

Cliffjumper made a rude noise through his intakes. "I don't know why you don't just blast the slaggers with the ice chunks instead of trapping them."

"Don't be crude," Mirage said almost absently. "And this way is just as effective." He focused on something some distance away before nodding and pursing his lip plates. "I believe my services are needed elsewhere, if you can hold the line here?"

"Hmph. I don't need your skirts to get the job done," Cliffjumper boasted, and brought up his cannon, sighting on a few (thus far) unmolested Decepticons.

* * *

"Sugar Power, Activate!"

"Aqua Power, Activate!"

Two pillars of sparkling power, one gold and the other navy, shot up out of the ground. When they subsided, two Autobots, beskirted and beribboned, stood ready amongst the sparkles.

Bumblebee, in gold skirt and collar and black bow, grinned cheerfully at a dumbfounded Brawn. "We'll take care of this," he told him, and curved his hands in front of his chest plate, forming the outline of a heart with fingers and thumbs. "Moon Honey Spark…" he clapped his hands together sharply, and in the space between his palms, golden syrup condensed into a shining heart. "Burst!"

Brawn stared at Onslaught, who was now stumbling around, blinded, liberally coated helm to pedes in gold sparkles. He looked back at his fellow mini, who was still smiling cheerfully. "Bumblebee? You…how…huh?"

"Good job, 'Bee," the tall red Transformer in the navy skirt and collar said, and Brawn was startled to recognize _Inferno _of all mechs. "Let's put him out for good for this battle, huh?"

"All yours!" Bumblebee chirped.

Inferno crossed his wrists in front of his chest plate – now sporting a bright, fuchsia-pink bow – and then pulled them apart, fingers spread wide, framing the gleaming navy and silver round panel attached to the bow. "Moon Hydro Rush!" he called and a great fount of water frothed between his hands and pulsed outwards, barreling straight for Onslaught.

The large navy Combaticon went down immediately.

"I don't know what's going on," Brawn said slowly, looking at the downed Onslaught. He grinned up at Inferno. "But I think I like it!"

* * *

**A/N: **Cliffjumper finds out about Mirage in _Elevator_, but as of _Activate!_ has yet to meet Imbrium and thus has not yet earned his own skirts.

I. I just really like CJ, okay? ALL OF THE CLIFFJUMPER/MIRAGE FRIENDSHIP FIC. Or shipping fic. Oh Transformers, why must I ship all of you with all of you?

One more part of Activate! to go!


	60. Activate! V

**Activate! Part V**

All over the battlefield, pillars of sparkling light sprang up, transforming sorely pressed Autobots into triumphant and powerful warriors wielding incredible powers who mowed down the Decepticon threat.

They were also dressed very strangely, but there had to be a price to pay _somewhere_, Optimus thought. "You've lost, Megatron," he said aloud. "For the sake of your army, surrender now."

"Is the mighty Prime so weak that he allows others to fight his battle for him?" Megatron asked mockingly, motioning at the brightly clad Autobots. "A leader who would give up power to his inferiors isn't any kind of leader at all."

But Optimus just smiled. "A leader knows to accept the help of his friends," he chided gently. "We are stronger for the bonds of trust that run between us. And that is why the Autobots will never lose to you. We value our comrades too dearly."

"Sentimental nonsense," Megatron spat.

"Perhaps," Optimus said mildly, "but it doesn't change the fact that, according to my _friends_, seventy-five percent of your forces on the field are no longer in fighting condition."

::Decepticon forces now at twenty-two percent capacity,:: Prowl said over the comm, despite the fact that he was currently on the other side of the battlefield and had no insight to the current conversation. Optimus silently blessed Prowl's near miraculous capability of knowing exactly when information was needed. ::Bluestreak has since taken out Thundercracker, removing the Seekers from battle.::

"My mistake," Optimus continued, smiling, "Seventy-eight percent."

"This isn't the end of it, Prime," Megatron snarled. "Decepticons, retreat!"

As Megatron blasted off into the sky, his battered army staggering behind him, across the field the Autobots cheered their success.

::Operation: Crescent Light complete, sir.:: Prowl said quietly over the comm.

::Thank you, my friends,:: Optimus told the special channel that routed out to the ten Upgraded bots. ::It is due to your efforts that we were able to deal such a mighty blow to the Decepticons today.:: He paused, and then added curiously, ::But why 'Crescent Light'?::

::Tranquility,:: Prowl admitted. ::She has a speech she has prepared for each induction of a new member in which she claims we must 'fight together in secret by crescent light'.::

::So much for the secret part,:: Jazz added cheerfully. ::Think she'll be mad?::

* * *

**A/N: **And that is the end of the Activate! series. There are a couple more pieces that I want to put in to finish off this arc; namely Wheeljack, Hound and Trailbreaker's first transformations, and the 'Ratchet and Wheeljack find out' bit which will take place a fair time before 'Jack gets his Upgrade. Once that's all done, I'll likely post the first and second arcs in order up on AO3.


	61. Pretty

**Pretty  
**Takes_ place after 'Orange' but before 'Puppyoptics'._

"What in Primus' name did you do to your plating? Did you jump into a vat of glitter? Have you _any_ idea what that kind of thing does to your circuits?"

Tuning out Ratchet's ranting with the ease of long practice, Wheeljack poked at the shimmering maroon stuff attached to Sideswipe's hips. "What's its purpose?" he asked curiously.

"It makes me look pretty," Sideswipe said cheekily. "Don't you think so?"

"You're very pretty," Wheeljack agreed, laughing. Sideswipe, laid out on the table in the Med Bay with a completely busted leg, visibly preened.

"It's an Upgrade to augment combat abilities," Prowl explained, standing stoically in his own grey skirt and red bow. "The existence of which is highly classified, you understand."

"Do you mean to tell me you lot have been fooling around with unapproved upgrades and didn't think to let the Chief Medical Officer – the bot who is in charge of _fixing_ your sorry afts – know about it?" Ratchet asked dangerously, whirling on Prowl.

"As I said, the existence of these Upgrades are classified, and –"

"And we're lettin' you know now, ain't we Prowl?" Jazz added quickly, slinging an arm over Prowl's shoulder. Prowl twitched under his arm, but didn't refute this statement.

Jazz, Wheeljack noted, was also in a 'pretty' skirt. "So how many of you are there with these – ah – Upgrades?"

"There are currently five Autobots, including ourselves, with the Upgrades." Prowl replied.

"Sunny and 'Bee, too." Jazz said cheerfully.

"And is this likely to become a widespread condition?" Ratchet demanded. "Sideswipe, lie back down. I can't fix you if you keep twitching all over the slagging place."

Sideswipe slumped back down under Ratchet's hand with a huff. "The cat said there're more of us but she doesn't know who yet. Slag, doc, just because I like it rough in the berth doesn't mean I—"

"The cat," Ratchet said flatly. "You mean the little black cat that's been following Prowl around lately?" He ignored Sideswipe, who pouted but subsided for the time being.

"What, really? I didn't know Earth cats could talk," Wheeljack said thoughtfully. He poked at the orange ribbon on Sideswipe's chest plate next, and Ratchet swatted his hand away with a muttered curse.

"Tranquility is…unique." Prowl said. "In any case, she has indeed claimed that there are more to be Upgraded, although she has yet to reveal just how many."

"Prowl tried," Jazz explained. "The kitty cat's real good at disappearing when she don't want to answer."

"I vote for Grimlock as the next Upgraded bot," Sideswipe suggested. "Don't you think _he'd_ look pretty?"

"I think I need a drink," Ratchet muttered.


End file.
